et moi, à quoi je crois? (And me, what do I believe?)

Off the Record ^ | September 1, 2007 | Diogenes

[NYer]

Now this is sad.

"Toupie" is a serialized French picture-book ("for ages two through four"), of which I came upon a ten-year-old Christmas-themed issue. One of the vignettes (click here and here) shows a living-room scene with the kitten Pikou cozily enjoying Christmas Eve with Momma and Poppa cat. The following dialogue takes place:

-- Why have Grandma and Grandpa gone out tonight? asked Pikou.
-- Grandma and Grandpa go to Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve.
-- Why don't we go with them, Momma?
-- Because I don't share their religion, said Momma.
-- What? There's more than one religion?
-- Yes, said Poppa, there are many religions.
-- And, added Momma, there are people like me who don't believe in God.
-- Do you believe, Poppa?
-- Yes, I believe in God, but I don't feel their need to go to church.
-- What about me, when I grow up? asked Pikou.
-- When you grow up, it's you who make the choice. Your ideas are your own.
-- OK, said Pikou. As for me, I'll just wait for Santa Claus!

The moral falsity of this vignette hinges on its ostensible purpose, i.e., to address (and satisfy) a child's naive curiosity about religion. But it doesn't do that at all. In reality the rationalizations are addressed to heathen parents -- no practicing Catholic would read this tripe to his children -- and intended to comfort prosperous and lazy post-Christians vexed with a bad conscience about their own captious laicism and spiritual sloth.

It's noteworthy that the Pikou Curieux of this fiction is conveniently incurious about the Why of his parents' belief and non-belief, and so the truly awkward questions remain unasked. Further, beyond the inert sociological datum that different people believe different things about God, the child-hearer of this story is given no help to understand the mystery that pulls his grandparents out of the house at midnight and is somehow connected with the unusual festiveness of the season. Framed in a context of self-congratulatory tolerance ("it's you who make the choice ..."), the lesson in fact insinuates an agnostic point of view, inasmuch as every young child intuitively understands his parents would never withhold anything they believed was really important to his well-being. God can't be a big deal, if those who love me most are so comfortable in their contradictions about Him.

In posting Pikou I'm less concerned about its effect on the faith-lives of French toddlers than about a subject closer to home: the way in which its clandestine agnosticism mirrors the hesitations of the typical Catholic university -- hesitations deftly summarized by R.R. Reno in this excellent post on the First Things blog. In brief: if the academics who govern and comprise the faculty of Catholic universities cannot affirm that reason leads us to God and godliness, then the students who sit at their feet must draw one of two conclusions: 1) God is not important enough to matter; or 2), the university's "search for truth" is a scam. Those Doctors of Philosophy, after all, have scaled the academic peak and are perched at the top. If they tell us there's nothing reason can see from that vantage point, why should we bother to make the ascent ourselves?

[Khepera]

Well happy birthday Jesus!

[NYer]

When you grow up, it's you who make the choice. Your ideas are your own.

Let me assure you right up front, "children" who grow up with this choice, NEVER make one! My stepfather is in this group. His parents were both baptized into the Lutheran Church but never baptized him because they believed the choice was up to him. He is now 75 and remains unbaptized. He has been on my perpetual prayer list since I was a small child.

I have several co-workers who also fall into this category. Without some faith foundation, grownup 'children' are hard pressed to pick a religion. This is timely and sad.

[lightman]

Romans 10:14-17

But how are they to call on one in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in one of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone to proclaim him? And how are they to proclaim him unless they are sent? As it is written, ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!’ But not all have obeyed the good news; for Isaiah says, ‘Lord, who has believed our message?’ So faith comes from what is heard, and what is heard comes through the word of Christ.

How are they to “choose” without having been catechized?

[AnAmericanMother]

It could be worse . . .

I have two examples, unrelated and unknown to each other, but curiously almost identical, of what can happen to the children of agnostic or atheist parents.

In one case, father was Jewish, mother Catholic, they compromised on Unitarian (i.e. a liberal social action club rather than a religion) but rarely attended. Daughter became a Pagan (Wiccan) High Priestess.

In the second case, father was atheist, mother agnostic. Daughter became a Wiccan High Priestess.

I guess if you're going to rebel against parents who have no religion, you have to get REALLY weird . . . .

[terycarl]

no one is baptized into the Lutheran Church....If you recieve a valid baptism, you are a Catholic....there is only one true Christian religion, and Catholocism is it....you may make the choice not to practice the Catholic religon, nonetheless you are a Catholic.....welcome back!!!

[guinnessman]

I have a good friend of mine whose father was Catholic and mother was Lutheran. They had three kids, two boys and a girl. They decided to raise one boy Catholic, the other boy Lutheran, and let the girl decide for herself.

Fortunately for the family, the boy, who was raised as a lapsed Catholic, became interested in Medjugorje, started to say the rosary daily, and converted the rest of the family.

[Biggirl]

How true. Even if the baptism takes place in another church community, as long as the part of baptism practice is to baptize invoking the most Holy Trinity, one not only becomes a Christian but also a Catholic.

[NYer]

How are they to “choose” without having been catechized?

Bingo! I truly believe that parents who intentionally neglect the Baptism and religious education of their children, will be held accountable by God. The pastor has placed me in charge of the Rel. Ed. program at our parish. Letters of invitation went out on Friday. He has cautioned me to expect 'challenges' from parents whose children don't want to attend. One letter was addressed to the parents of 2 girls, aged 9 and 11, who have never been baptized. These same parents spare no expense outfitting their children for secular schools, yet send them into the maelstrom of this world with no armor to protect their immortal souls.

[NYer]

the boy, who was raised as a lapsed Catholic, became interested in Medjugorje, started to say the rosary daily, and converted the rest of the family.

Awesome story! Thank you for posting it.

[NYer]

welcome back!!!

Thanks but I never left :-) In marrying my mother in a Catholic Church, he promised to continue to raise me Catholic (I was 8 and enrolled in Catholic school). Over the years, he occasionally attended Mass with me and my mother and paid for my Catholic school education. I have tried to encourage him to explore the Catholic faith but my mother, for some odd reason, feels he should remain true to his 'Lutheran roots' ... huh? He is a better 'christian' than many I know but does not like organized religion.

[starfish923]

I have a good friend of mine whose father was Catholic and mother was Lutheran. They had three kids, two boys and a girl. They decided to raise one boy Catholic, the other boy Lutheran, and let the girl decide for herself.
Fortunately for the family, the boy, who was raised as a lapsed Catholic, became interested in Medjugorje, started to say the rosary daily, and converted the rest of the family.

What an INCREDIBLY stupid, immature, stupid, selfish, self-serving, stupid, spineless set of parents that poor friend of yours had.

By the way, the ongoing miracle of Medjugorje (1981) was no less than the miracle of your friend's siblings.

[PAR35]

I guess if you're going to rebel against parents who have no religion, you have to get REALLY weird .

And what about those kids who are brought up in a group like the Episcopalians. Some of them turn out RC ...

[AnAmericanMother]

Heh-heh. I've heard of that happening . . . .

(of course, when I was coming along, some Episcopalian rectors still believed.)

[fortunecookie]

In my largely Catholic area, I know of 3 such families off the top of my head. One Catholic parent, another Protestant (one Methodist, one Baptist, another non-practicing). In all 3, kids raised Catholic. But 'open' to the other parent's faith and interchanging Mass or Sunday worship, upon whim. Most of their 7 collective kids are non-practicing, 2 are Wiccan, 2 openly antagonistic to 'organized' religion. Perhaps there is a theme.

Curiously, 2 of the non-Catholic wives are actively involved in the Ecumenical movement locally. One is very proud of helping to convince local Catholics and clergy to be more 'open minded'.

[AnAmericanMother]

From a religious point of view -- as in so many other things, from discipline to charity -- parents need to present a united front. And they had better get their waterfowl aligned before the babies start coming along.

If parents are two different religions (or no religion at all), they have to make accommodations and sweep a lot of important discussion under the rug. Which demonstrates to the kids that religion isn't that important. Bad idea.

[JeepInMazar]

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