I have failed in my attempt to fully capture the catholic experience. I am shamed.
The only question is whether it’s a venial sin I can pray away, or a mortal sin that must be burned off in purgatory. If it’s mortal, I’m having my the pockets of my funeral suit stuffed with hotdogs and marshmallows.
For twenty years I listened to my Mother-in-Law lament about the way her son, the former alter boy had fallen away from the Church & she reminded him more than yearly about the time the Monseigneur had washed his feet. Ex said that the Monseigneur would stop Mass to stare down any late arrivals. He was NOT a Priest to trifle with.
Since I'd never gone to a foot washing, I felt that I'd managed to miss one of the main events.