OK, dear it might fix my headache

The Australian ^ | October 3, 2003 | George Gordon

[demlosers]

WOMEN are duty-bound to provide their husbands with sex on demand, claims a controversial book on achieving wedded bliss.

Wives have a "loving obligation" to have sex whenever they are asked for it - even if they are not in the mood, says American author Dr Laura Schlessinger.

The 56-year-old sex therapist and radio host says marriages will survive and improve if men are viewed as a "gift from God".

And she urges women to stop nagging and whining, saying: "Be honest girls, that's what we do".

Her book, The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, will not be published until January, but it has already been labelled "outrageous" by feminists, marriage experts and psychologists.

Dr Schlessinger, who has a PhD in psychology, has written 60 books on marriage and attracts 100 million listeners every week to her radio show.

Her moralistic views have often clashed head-on with those who view marriage as an equal partnership.

In her latest book, she writes: "If husbands are expected to go to work and earn money and visit relatives they don't like, why can't wives put out on demand?"

Marriage counsellor Jennie Bergat condemned Dr Schlessinger's remarks.

"It is outrageous. Women have a right to be tired and if a woman is not in the mood, a man should respect that," Ms Bergat said.

"When you sign a marriage certificate you don't surrender privacy and rights. She is declaring that women are chattels to be used at the man's whim."

The Australian

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

Dear, I'm also homeschooling a very sick child AND taking care of my home AND helping my husband AND helping a daughter in a search for a college AND, just like you, I prefer my job to anyone elses - it's better than the full time job I was doing while supporting the family the past year - still found time for my husband and myself....

[hopespringseternal]

One reply in 64 posts? Looks like the answer is "No."

Women use sex to men. They use guilt to keep them.

When I was getting married, nearly every man I talked to counseled me that marriage was more akin to a trap than anything else. The especially good men would just say that it involves a lot of sacrifice. Men simply have no clue that the thing they will be asked to sacrifice is exactly the thing they got married for in the first place.

[Polybius]

Hate to tell you this, your wife is taking you for a ride. Unfortunately, its not a naked ride between the sheets either. What does she do with her time if she isnt taking care of kids or cleaning? And how on earth is she too tired after doing nothing?

How dare you ask that? That's "abuse".

That is the answer I would get a couple of years ago when she was neck deep with a feminist "therapist". The house was a mess as the cleaning lady could only dust her piles of "stuff" all over the house. Dinner was often at 9:00 PM. Of course, it was all my fault as I was always "angry". Gee, I wonder why?

Then I got myself a divorce lawyer and had to go 60 miles out of our left-wing, tofu-eating, chrystal-channeling Pacific Northwest town to find a marriage counsellor that did not ask you how your Inner Child was.

I had reached the point where I was asking myself:

"O.K. My family loses everything in Cuba. We come to this country. My father, who used to be a hospital administrator of the largest hospital in Havana, has to drive a taxi to put food on the table for years before he dies of cancer leaving me fatherless and broke at age 16 but with a good Jesuit education. I work like a dog and give up my 20's to get an M.D., give up my 30's to become a specialist and give up my 40's to pay 6-figures in Federal income taxes for what?........ So that this American-born spoiled brat of Democrat parents can whine about what a tough life she has and wallow in her victimhood?"

So, I gave her 90 days after we started counselling to either shape up or go our separate ways.

Now, two years later, I must admit, she has made a 120 degree (not yet 180 degree) turn.

The mess in the house is almost gone. Dinner is now at a reasonable time and the word "abuse" has not crossed her lips in 20 months.

Last night she said she had had trouble sleeping for several days and I got a rain check.

So, things are much better now than they were 2 years ago.

However, sometimes the old resentment of the old feminazi days still surfaces and it spills out as it did in my post.

She just called. Dinner is ready and it is 7:18 Pacific Time.

Life is definitely better.

[xzins]

Perhaps they haven't seen or read it.

But you are correct. It appears that if sex on request accomplished all those positive things that women would not be willing to go the route of sex on request.

Would it make a difference if I said "daily sex" instead of "sex on request?"

[PFKEY]

Well said.

[OMalley]

***Dear, I'm also homeschooling a very sick child AND taking care of my home AND helping my husband AND helping a daughter in a search for a college AND, just like you, I prefer my job to anyone elses - it's better than the full time job I was doing while supporting the family the past year - still found time for my husband and myself....***

Soccer practices, games, band, chior....its the greatest job in the world and Ditto, I still find time for my hubby too.

I know a lady who is constantly complaining her husband is critical of her (the house, spending ect) yet she never considers that this is a result of the man not getting lucky for nearly 2 years!

From what my husband says sex for a man is equivelent of cuddling for a woman, it makes them feel loved and cared about (its not the only thing, but surely a big thing)

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

Excellent explanation! And if I might add, men like for their wives to be the ones to initiate sex too - makes them actually think we might enjoy it a little!

[Khurkris]

"Yeah, but she's still pretty good. I don't think most of us could do her job as well as she does."

Respectfully I do not agree. IMHO she is a side-show sadist. She is an abusive egoist. She has made a shambles of her life and vents her bitter spleen on those who sadly seek advice fom her.

But thats just my opinion.

[OMalley]

**Unless there is a medical problem, any marriage in which sex "occurs" about once a month is probably a sick marriage.**

I was recently given a book to read from a friend on "holiness living" and when I got to the sex part I had to LOL.

It said exactly the opposite of your post. that sex was not an important part of marriage and that you should find more "holy" things to do.

if you found yourself wanting sex more than occasionally, or thought of it often you were to consult your doctor to see something was physically wrong with you. If there wasnt you simply needed more prayer and dicipline.

She asked me what I thought of the book since she found it wonderful, I didnt know what to say.....

[OMalley]

***Excellent explanation! And if I might add, men like for their wives to be the ones to initiate sex too - makes them actually think we might enjoy it a little!***

LOL, Yep! I dont think women realize what a big pile of moosh they can make thier men with a little initiative;)

[hopespringseternal]

Women use sex to men. They use guilt to keep them.

Make that:
Women use sex to get men. They use guilt to keep them.

[fqued]

Now that is bizarre.

I am an evangelical Christian, and I believe that God designed pleasure and fun into being a human being.

Frankly, Dr. Laura is close to the truth on the matter, the point being that sex, although not a necessity of life [some would disagree], is very high in the second tier.

Most teenage guys think about sex somewhere around 142% of the time. that diminishes somewhat over time, but not much.

Ever noticed that when a pretty woman walks by, ALL the men look, no matter what the age? [okay, not all, but 98%]

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

If we were smarter, we could rule the world......lol

[OMalley]

**Ever noticed that when a pretty woman walks by, ALL the men look, no matter what the age? [okay, not all, but 98%]***

I think if a man is being treated like a man at home, hes less likely to look.

As I said a woman has the potential to turn her husband into a big pile of moosh...If done right he doesnt have time to look or think about other women cuz he is in a state of bliss from the one he has;)

Ive seen my hubby look a few times, but always says "gee Darlin' that outfit would look great on you" hey it earns him a few brownie points anyway;)LOL

[OMalley]

**If we were smarter, we could rule the world......lol**

HeHe, Yep LOL

[CaptainK]

I have a relative who decided to be Mr. Mom because his wife made fairly big bucks. By the end of the year he hired a nanny and a housekeeper. Wasn't as easy as he thought. And it cut into his golf game.

[OMalley]

**I have a relative who decided to be Mr. Mom because his wife made fairly big bucks. By the end of the year he hired a nanny and a housekeeper. Wasn't as easy as he thought. And it cut into his golf game.**

Lol, My sisters husband asked her "what do you do all day" because everyday he came home and everyday the house was clean, as if the house cleaned itself and the kids too. She went "on strike" for a week, he never said it again;)

[hopespringseternal]

That is the answer I would get a couple of years ago when she was neck deep with a feminist "therapist".

The human mind is incredible. You can decide to miserable in any circumstance and you can decide to be content in any circumstance.

The great preponderance of men have made peace with sexual frustration. They realize that is just the way it is going to be, no amount of whining will change it, and forcing the issue will only cause pain and suffering for all.

But then they aren't facing a deeply committed lobby telling them to be miserable all the time no matter what.

Women tuned into feminism are plugged into a network that drains the contentment from their lives and convinces them that no matter what, job or no job, maid, 5000sqft mansion, $80k car, and a husband committed to doing her wishes is only cause for a pity party. And it's all his fault.

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

LOL...... it has it's ups and downs...... but still beats fighting traffic and putting up with some of the crap in corporate America........lol...of course the pay sucks, big time....... lol

[patton]

I think if a man is being treated like a man at home, hes less likely to look.

BINGO. We have a winner.

If girls only knew...