Put 'er there, pal (Practical Jokes, etc.)

Ever short sheet a bed? Put salt in the sugar bowl? Glue a silver dollar to the sidewalk? All common in the world of the PRACTICAL JOKE

Some practical jokers load a sleeping bunkmate's hands with shaving cream, then tickle him. Others slap a "Kiss Me" sign on a friend (junior high school, anyone?) or write an incriminating memo ("Thanks for last night!") on a check. The more devious replace a news-hound neighbor's newspaper with yesterday's edition or loosen the top on a salt shaker. Targets, masterminds — all enjoy a good laugh.

Practical jokes are tricks done with a hint of mischief, resulting in a small amount of discomfort and embarrassment along with a great deal of shared laughter.

Take my husband's oh-so-serious law office. The occasional practical joke eases tensions and gives rise to admiration for ingenuity. There are rules — clients and judges are off limits, as is tampering with legal documents.

Example? One attorney left his credit card on a restaurant table; the waitress returned it to another attorney. Back in the office 30 minutes later, the target received a telephone call (placed by an accomplice outside the building). Purporting to be an account activity verifier, the caller asked about unusual charges ("Two Jet Skis and a four wheeler, sir? And just now, another charge at a Congress Avenue coffee shop is coming in."). Discovering the card was missing, the attorney sprinted for the door shouting, "Hold the perp there! I am coming to get my card!" The howling pranksters met him at the elevator with his credit card. Everyone came away laughing. It is a tale often retold.

Curious about who pulls practical jokes? Know what makes them successful? Have an inkling when a joke has gone too far? Wonder if they are appropriate in the workplace? Read on. You will learn much about this simple entertainment and besides, you deserve a good laugh on Saturday morning.

Most folks point to the introduction of the new calendar in the 16th century. Moving the date of New Year's Day from April 1 to Jan. 1 was controversial. Those who knew about the change ridiculed those who did not, calling them "April fools." April Fools Day has since institutionalized the mayhem of playing tricks.

But I am sure practical jokes had an earlier beginning. Not hard to believe the first whoopee cushion was made by a snarky caveman who had an extra animal bladder and a little time on hand.

A successful one includes several elements, advises local comic and practical joker Dana Smith, who says, "If you can look someone in the eye and smile, they will believe almost anything." Smith enjoys masterminding as well as being the target of practical jokes.

Like a good lie, a good practical joke has to be believable and contain an element of the unknown as well as a grain of truth. Finally, notes Smith, "you have to believe it and keep going even when the target seems to catch on."

One of Smith's favorite ruses is done in concert with fellow comic Jimmy Roulette at the Capitol City Comedy Club. Patrons at the entrance witness Roulette bound out from backstage and excitedly proclaim, "He's out again! Have you seen him?" Patrons immediately check the floor around their feet not knowing what "him" is — a snake, a monkey or a disgruntled employee? The unknown heightens the experience.

Small potatoes for a man who during his days as a waiter often played "Who can tell the biggest lie about themselves to customers?" and perfected his comic deadpan by recommending nonexistent restaurants and bars in faraway cities to travelers at Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport. The targets experience a little discomfort and confusion before realizing they have been had. Chuckles usually follow.

"Hard to be angry and laugh at the same time," says Robert Seidel, clinical social worker and psychotherapist.

Both the joker and the target can benefit from a healthy practical joke. How so? The target enjoys being the center of attention and feels accepted as an initiated member of a group. In addition, it is an honor to be gently roasted by your peers. The joker uses the event to relieve stress, possibly deal with some aggression, or "take the person who is full of him/herself down a peg." Working in a group, practical jokers use the pranks to initiate new members — campers, co-workers, etc. — and to bring folks together. Bonus: A clever practical joke brings a bit of admiration and status. Acid test? "What you really want is to have everyone, especially the recipient, smile and laugh each time they recall the event in the future," said Seidel.

Not exactly, advises Seidel. The intimacy created by a healthy practical joke does not exist in a hurtful one, which creates pain and distance.

Practical jokes should not be destructive to property or smack of vandalism. The moment of doubt or misery or dread should be short-lived. Do not let someone swing in the wind too long. In addition, Seidel says, "You must know the person well to pull off (a joke) and for it to be OK." Peers are the best practical joke targets and the best locations are familiar places.

Acid test? Will the practical joke be remembered fondly by all concerned? "Keep it fun and not be destructive, hurtful, hateful or malicious. It is something to make you closer to the person and the person closer to you," says Seidel.

Generally, practical jokes with a sexual innuendo are off limits, as are jokes that may result in bodily harm. Do not hint a co-worker's girlfriend has been unfaithful just to see if he hires a detective. Turning signs or soaping the handrails on the stairway may cause more than laughs — too dangerous.

Your memory may not be at fault if you cannot find your car. Did you by any chance leave your keys within the reach of Kathy Price, Zilker Elementary music teacher and practical joker?

"I returned a fellow teacher's lost keys but moved his car first," admits Price, "and stopped him before he called the police to report a stolen vehicle." Sometimes Price includes the students in a prank, like hiding from another teacher for a moment. A little bit of fun does no harm, "and the students have talked about it for years."

That philosophy is shared by Joe Conway, screenwriting instructor and English teacher at St. Stephen's Episcopal School. One spring Conway left faux pink telephone message slips in the in boxes of his fellow teachers. He listened (and guffawed) as they returned the calls to the zoo ("I am returning the call of Mr. G. Raft"), the public library ("Is Warren Peace in?"), etc.

They may have been let loose on the St. Stephen's campus during the annual senior prank. Such antics are not new to this campus. Chickens and balloons have been liberated there, too. The headmaster has found his office furniture switched with another administrator. You get the idea.

Mike Davis, head of the Upper School at St. Stephen's, says such shenanigans by the senior class every spring release tension and promote community. The students' first ideas may not be the best, so teachers guide them. Putting cooking oil on door knobs is amusing; slathering it on a gym floor is not.

All this tomfoolery is taken in stride on this small, private school campus. A large, public school campus might not be as charmed by roaming fowl or any spring high jinks.

Certainly works in some offices. "Practical jokes in the workplace can be a connective thing if they promote shared laughter," says Patt Schwab, a national workplace consultant. The underlying message should be positive; the overriding rule is respect for others. A workplace without humor tends to be "high in attrition and low in creativity," says Schwab.

Rarely does a good practical joke cross supervisory lines. Managers can pull the legs of managers; worker-bees, of worker-bees. And above all, warns Schwab, be sure of your target and the consequences. Some folks do not like practical jokes.

"Don't humiliate someone — unless you are confident that you will never have to work with them, or anyone who cares about them, ever, ever again. Even then it's risky," says Schwab.

A fictional character in many of the practical jokes played by Coby Garner, a member of Austin's high-tech and high-jinks community. Garner's participation in high school and college athletics meant he was steeped in team initiation rites. Run-of-the-mill jokes included planting several hotel remote controls in an innocent teammate's duffel bag during an on-the-road stay and stealing a sleeping teammate's shoe and placing it on an airport luggage carousel.

Dave Tarpley is a useful, fictional fellow for Garner. During a move within Austin, Tarpley, supposedly an employee from the rental van office, called the renter of the moving van to say that if the van was returned several hours early, the rental fee would be waived because the van was needed for another move. The target cajoled his friends into speeding things up. Proudly returning the van early, the target was shocked to learn the rental was not free. And, surprise, no employee named Dave Tarpley could be found. The move was not free but was finished early. No harm done.

"It is not about being cruel, it is about having fun and having stories to tell later," says Garner, who admits he should sleep with one eye open considering his penchant for practical jokes.

The plethora of candid camera-type stunts has led to litigation, some of which involves the latest revival of the father of practical joke shows, "Candid Camera."

Allen Funt's original "Candid Camera" debuted in 1948. Viewers were amused by mild-mannered pranks such as bowling balls returning to bowlers without holes, stranded drivers who turned out to have engineless automobiles. The predicaments as well as the unsuspecting targets' reactions were ended with a congenial "Smile, you're on 'Candid Camera.' "

Some targets in reality television shows today are not smiling. The most recent version of "Candid Camera," starring Peter Funt, is being sued by a traveller who claims to have been injured while sliding through a fake security conveyor belt at an airport.

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My favorite one (dont ever tell him I said so though) is when my husband took some black electrical tape, and taped the handle squeezed shut on that sink squirty hose thing. I turned on the water and instantly got drenched, so did half my kitchen. He was cackling and guffawing all the way through mopping up the mess.

At one office I worked at, we had a client (client A) who had a point of contact with us who was a royal pain in the behind to our team leader because she didn't have a clue what she was doing, but was very bossy and demanding.

She eventually got canned, but a few months after that (on April 1) I faked an email to my team leader making it look like an announcement from another client of ours (client B) that they hired her. I made the email way over the top and was sure that he would see it was a joke, but he fell for it totaly. On top of this, right after reading it he got a call from client B! When he asked about them hiring her and got a 'what the heck are you talking about' response he realized the email was a joke and covered his tracks pretty well. Lucky for me he thought it was funny and wasn't mad about it.

Then there was the time in Grade 6 when there was a thick blanket of perfect 'snowman snow' all over the schoolgrounds. Before long I had every boy in Gr. 6,7 and 8 pushing on a 6 foot diameter snowball that we just happen to leave in the parking lot in such a way as to block in the Vice Principal's car. By the time he found out, it had frozen to the ground and it was easier to move the car sideways by hand then remove the snowball. He was REALLY mad and I was scared someone would tell him I was behind it but everyone kept quiet, including the teacher who saw us do it!

A local radio show in the SF Bay Area, Lamont & Tonelli, does phone pranks on Fridays. A very embarrassing insight into human female nature is how often they get young women to offer their "services" to "look the other way". I must admit it might have something to do with Lamont's good look sounding masculine voice.

The latest time he called an art college student claiming to be a lawyer from the RIAA, about to charge her $180,000 for swapping files on Kazaa. Within about 2 minutes she was offering to "do anything" to get out of her jam. I feel bad, she must just about die of embarrassment when she finds out she’s on the radio.

Men don't really have this as an option, but women have a built-in get out of jail card available to them. I'm sort of curious how often they use it in real life. How often does a woman about to lose her job end up keeping it?

Just for everyone to have a good laugh.

Not me. I loathe practical jokes, concept and execution. They are particularly abominable because they play on others' genuine benevolence and reasonable expectation that they will be dealt with truthfully.

They also, despite the caveats in this article, all too easily shade into sheer cruelty. I vividly remember a "joke" played by the repo men at the bank where my father worked. They used their skeleton keys to move his older car around the parking lot, putting signs on it saying such witty things as "I Am Ready To Go." He was humiliated. Especially since he had been desperately trying, at the same time, at another bank, to get a note for buying a newer and better (not new, we couldn't afford it) car to replace it, with his own employers having turned him down. They wouldn't give him the raise he deserved, either, to allow him to "better represent" his employer by the car he drove.

Don't forget, either, that Allen Funt was the target of frequent fists and black eyes, as well as litigation, for his stunts -- none of which was seen, of course, by the viewers.

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