The Autobiography Of A Freshman (STUNNING Al Capp Essay Written When He Was 12)

My Well Balanced Life On A Wooden Leg (Autobiography) | 1922 & 1923 | Alfred Caplin (Al Capp)

[PJ-Comix]

I

When I endeavor to look back into the past, a vision, a dim vision, obstructed by dark clouds comes back to me.

I am in a garden, a beautiful garden where there are sweet-smelling roses and grape arbors with their luscious fruit hanging temptingly. There are apple trees in the garden, apple trees overladen with myriads of red fruit, and the grass is green. There is Happiness in that garden.

For ten happy years I dwelt in this garden, unconcious of the evils outside its gates, kept busy with study and recreation. I had companions in this garden, other children, red-cheeked children, crowing, joyful children.

But one day, one sad day, I ventured out of this garden, hand in hand with the false siren Curiousity. I walked, amazed at the clanging noisy world---not at all like the peaceful garden that I had left behind me---forever.

There came a great noise---a great cry---a crash---and darkness.

And the gate of the garden closed.

II

Months passed---a year came and was gone in what seemed to me an age. It was an age of Whitness. A white bed, white-clad nurses, white-clad doctors, shining white instruments---white ---a horrible ghastly age of Whiteness.

III

When the year passed, I arose from my sick-bed and hastened to the garden. I saw there the same companions of my childhood playing in it. I hammered at its gate. The children ran to the fence and spoke a few words of pity to me and then resumed their frolics. And to this day, I sit at the gate, vainly waiting for the day when I may enter. Sometimes the children come to the edge of the gate and speak a few words of pity to me---but not for long. They hear the call of health and, hastening back, resume their play.

[PJ-Comix]

I found this essay in an autobiographical book, My Well-Balanced Life On A Wooden Leg, about Al Capp containing some of his writings. I was absolutely stunned when I read this essay by Capp alluding to his accident when 9 years old when a trolley car severed his left leg just below the thigh. Remember, Capp was only 12 years old when he wrote the first part of this essay in 1922 and 13 when the rest was written in 1923.

Do you know of ANY 12 or 13 year-old kid who could write with such great style and perception? OK, maybe it's just me but this essay really grabbed me bigtime.

[PJ-Comix]

FYI. BTW, didn't Capp live in your neck of the woods?

[LiteKeeper]

read later

[PJ-Comix]

I still can't get over the fact he was only 12 when he wrote this essay (the rest completed when Capp was 13). Of course, after he lost his leg at the age of almost 10, Capp read quite a bit.

[gcruse]

Wow. Did he waste his life on cartoons with a mind like that? We'll never know.

[PJ-Comix]

I still can't get over the fact he was only 12 when he wrote this essay (the rest completed when Capp was 13). Of course, after he lost his leg at the age of almost 10, Capp read quite a bit of literature.

[PJ-Comix]

Wow. Did he waste his life on cartoons with a mind like that? We'll never know.

Did you ever actually READ Li'l Abner? They were the GREATEST cartoons ever created. The parody and satire in those cartoons were the BEST. So why do you say he "wasted" his life on cartoons?

[Aquinasfan]

Do you know of ANY 12 or 13 year-old kid who could write with such great style and perception?

No. Not many adults either, including myself.

I wonder if he would have attained his celebrity if he hadn't suffered.

[gcruse]

With a mind like that at 13, great as Li'l Abner was, what else was Capp capable of? SWINE (Students Wildly Indignant about Nearly Everything) may have been an underachievement.

[saminfl]

They were the GREATEST cartoons ever created.

Absolutely correct.

[PJ-Comix]

With a mind like that at 13, great as Li'l Abner was, what else was Capp capable of?

Creating the GREATEST satirical comics ever. For decades the FIRST place where millions of people went when first opening up their newspapers was to see Li'l Abner.

SWINE (Students Wildly Indignant about Nearly Everything) may have been an underachievement.

Huh? This was only ONE of the many things Capp did in his comix. Ever hear of Sadie Hawkins Day? Or Kickapoo Juice or Shmoos or Fearless Fosdick (parody of Dick Tracy)? What's your problem with Capp?

[gcruse]

Good gawd, PJ. Did I say SWINE was all he ever did? I am a Capp fan, too. Simmer down, now.

[Oatka]

And don't forget the immortal

"A rousing cheer, a few Hurrahs and hip hip hip Hooray! What's good for General Motors, is good for the U.S.A!"

[PJ-Comix]

OK. Sorry. I misunderstood you. BTW, after reading this Capp essay, I am more determined than ever to go on with my Al Capp writing project. This essay was part of the materials that I have gathered. There are some INCREDIBLE things in Capp's life that a lot of people don't know about. Part of the reason for my project on Capp is that a lot of people of today have forgotten about Al Capp yet he was BY FAR the most influential cartoonist ever.

[EagleMamaMT]

I believe he was the greatest ever cartoonist, too. I wish the newspapers would rerun Li'l Abner. It would beat by a country mile the insipid pap they call comics today.

[pt17]

They were the GREATEST cartoons ever created.

Yes, indeed. They were brilliant. Oh that we had someone of Al Capp's ability today to skewer the politicians, elitists and scoundrels in a context like he did.

[Tauzero]

bttt

[aruanan]

Do you know of ANY 12 or 13 year-old kid who could write with such great style and perception? OK, maybe it's just me but this essay really grabbed me bigtime.

Only three: a niece, a nephew, and a student from a really bad neighborhood in Brooklyn. Even those who may have the capacity have been crippled, for the most part, by a school system that appears to be dedicated to creating a lot of little one-legged students in the pursuit of intellectual equality.

[Alouette]

What's good for General Motors, is good for the U.S.A!"

Wasn't that General Bullmoose??

[SamAdams76]

I'm not a big fan of the comic strips but I am aware of L'il Abner and remember that strip when I was a kid. Another strip I was familiar with as a youth was called "Andy Capp" and that was always a bit confusing. I wonder if the creator of that strip was trying to cash in on Al Capp's fame.

Anyway, Al Capp was from New Haven, CT. I've been down there frequently and it's a typical New England industrial town, similar to where I grew up in the Boston area.

Here is an example of Al Capp's work that I found on a website:

(1) THE SHLEMEEL- IS THE WAITER WHO IS SPILLING THE HOT SOUP ON THE CUSTOMER. THE SHLEMEEL ISN'T A BAD GUY_ _ _ HE DOESN'T MEAN TO DO ANYTHING BAD_ _ _HE'S SIMPLY INCAPABLE OF DOING ANYTHING GOOD. LOOK HOW REGREFUL HE IS THAT THE SHLEMOZZEL (2) IS BEING BOILED ALIVE.

(2) THE SHLEMOZZEL-- DOESN'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TO CAUSE A DISASTER _ _ _ ALL HE HAS TO DO IS BE SOMEPLACE_ _ _ AND THE DISASTER FINDS HIM.

(3) THE SHNOOK- IS THE FELLA WHO IS SURPRISED TO SEE THIS HORRIBLE THING HAPPENING_ _ _BUT WHO IS DELIGHTED BECAUSE IT ISN'T HAPPENING TO HIM. HE'S THE GUY WHO TOSSED THE WET CIGAR BUTT ON THE FLOOR THAT THE SHLEMEEL (1) IS SLIPPING ON. A SHNOOK DOESN'T DO MEAN THINGS DELIBERATELY. IT'S SIMPLY THAT EVERYTHING HE DOES TURNS OUT TO BE MEAN_ _ _ AND HE ISN'T SORRY.

(4) THE SHTOONK - IS THE ONE WHO IS LAUGHING AT THE POOR SHLEMOZZEL (2). A SHTOONK ENJOYS MISERY BUT HE'S TOO YELLOW TO CAUSE IT HIMSELF.

(5) THE SHNORRER - IS A CHAP WHO NEVER MISSES AN OPPORTUNITY _ _ _ EXCEPT AN OPPORTUNITY TO SPEND HIS OWN MONEY. HE'S TELLING THE WAITER TO QUICKLY PUT HIS DINNER ON THE SHTOONK'S (4) CHECK BECAUSE HE FEELS THAT ALL THIS HORROR IS MAKING THE SHTOONK (4) FEEL SO GOOD HE WON'T NOTICE THAT HE IS PAYING DOUBLE.

(6) AND (7) THE SHLOOMPS AND SHLEPPERS - THE SHLOOMP (6) IS VERY MUCH LIKE THE SHLEPPER (7) _ _ _ EXCEPT THAT HE IS NOT SO HOPEFUL. THE ONE THING A SHLOOMP AND A SHLEPPER HAVE IN COMMON IS THAT NEITHER OF THEM CAN DO ANYTHING. THE SHLEPPER (7) IS ARISING FROM HIS TABLE IN A SORT OF DAZED EFFORT TO DO SOMETHING _ _ _ AND NO MATTER WHAT HE DOES _ _ _ IT WILL MAKE MATTERS WORSE _ _ _ BUT THE SHLOOMP (6) IS SMART ENOUGH TO REALIZE THAT HE'S TOO STUPID TO DO ANYTHING_ _ _ AND SO HE JUST SITS THERE.