Staying fair and unbalanced for the election season [Dave Barry]

Miami Herald ^ | 9/14/03 | Dave Barry

[Slings and Arrows]

People often ask me: ''Dave, as a leading candidate for president yourself, can you be unbiased when you write about the other candidates?''

Yes. When I believe that my opponents are wrong, I will point that out. But, by the same token, when I believe that my opponents are having carnal relations with livestock, I will point that out, too. ''Fair and balanced,'' that is my legally trademarked motto.

[Slings and Arrows]

The column also zings John Kerry, who according to some reports served in Vietnam.

[genefromjersey]

Thanks for posting ! My local paper printed half-said " continued page G2"-only no second half appeared.( A clear case of media bias against Mr. Barry's campaign ! )

[robertpaulsen]

John Kerry. Didn't he serve in Vietnam?

[Slings and Arrows]

You are quite welcome. Oh, by the way, I hear that John Kerry served in Vietnam.

[Slings and Arrows]

This just in: At 11 am AST...1500z...the center of hurricane Isabel was located near
latitude 23.7 north...longitude 66.3 west...John Kerry served in Vietnam.

[Ole Okie]

John Kerry. Didn't he serve in Vietnam?

Gee, I hadn't heard that he served in Viet Nam.

Well duh! I served in World War 2, which obviously makes me more qualified than Kerry for the presidensity.

I did hear that he won a Gold Medal in the "Throw Someone Else's Medals Over the White House Fence" event.