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Memo to Fox: Hire Al Franken (Coulter mentioned)
BusinessWeek Onlin ^
| Thu Sep 4, 8:29 AM ET
| By Ciro Scotti
Posted on 09/04/2003 11:12:34 AM PDT by Forgiven_Sinner
Is that boo-hooing I hear coming from Fox News, just across 48th Street from BusinessWeek headquarters in New York? Well, maybe I'm hearing things. But it sure is heart-warming to imagine Fox's supersized boss Roger Ailes and his fair-and-balanced band blubbering from the slap in the face a federal judge delivered to them recently.
Fox had sued left-wing comedian and political satirist Al Franken for using the words "fair and balanced" in the title of his new book, Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right. The network that has wrapped itself, mummy-like, in the flag tried to deny Franken his constitutional right to free speech and self-expression by contending that the words "fair and balanced" implied an endorsement of the book by Fox. It is, of course, the self-described "fair and balanced" network, at least by its own definition.
On Aug. 22, U.S. District Court Judge Denny Chin in Manhattan dismissed the suit, in essence telling Fox, owned by Aussie emigre Rupert Murdoch, to get a life and a sense of humor.
CRY-BABY. Now Fox, and especially its blustery everyman host Bill O'Reilly, are the laughingstock of Media City. Laughing hardest is Franken, a hilarious and sometimes abrasive ex-writer and performer on Saturday Night Live (news - Y! TV) whose previous books include Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot and Other Observations. With a little help from his enemies at Fox, Lies and the Lying Liars is now the #2 best-selling book on Amazon.com, as of Sept. 3, and has also just grabbed the top spot on The New York Times Best-Seller List.
Bullies always whimper when they get the bejeezus beat out of them, especially by a nerdy-looking guy with glasses [Franken's comedic persona], and especially when such a big crowd is watching the fisticuffs. But Fox isn't just a bully, it's a sorry sport. In deciding not to further pursue its complaint against Franken, the network said in a statement on Aug. 25: "It's time to return Al Franken to the obscurity he is normally accustomed to." Ooo! Ouch!
If the warrior network wants to show that it's man enough to take a licking in a fair fight and get on with being so balanced, it ought to hire Franken, not belittle him. Right now, the most liberal among all the conservative voices on Fox is Alan Colmes of Hannity & Colmes. Colmes is the weak sister to Sean Hannity, the overheated patriot who has never pulled on a pair of combat boots.
KILLER BARBIE. Why not a political shouting show that pits Franken against one of Fox's conservative firebrands? O'Reilly, who reportedly badgered Fox to sue Franken, wouldn't do it. His own show is too successful and in umpteen news reports about the suit, clips on rival CNN showed O'Reilly squaring off against Franken during a panel discussion at a book-industry convention -- and completely losing it. Fox, which suggested in its suit that Franken was "unstable," might want to look at those clips of O'Reilly brought to a boil.
Here's my choice: Ann Coulter, the cable talk show uber-guest and blond-haired darling of the right. Franken would have a much tougher time goading this unflappable siren of conservatism. The Joe McCarthy-loving Barbie-look-alike has a book of her own out now, Treason: Liberal Treachery from the Cold War to the War on Terrorism, just like Franken. It's No. 47 on Amazon.com's best-seller list. A true-believing liberal vs. a true-believing goddess of whitebread would be a ratings-grabber for Fox. But perhaps it's far too risky for Ailes, O'Reilly, and the network's other cheesy-patriotism peddlers. What they don't want is to strike a balance by giving a forum to a lefty with a bruisingly funny left hook.
TOPICS: Editorial; Extended News; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: alfranken; anncoulter; anticoulter; barfalert; communists; conservativebashing; coulterbashing; dnctalkingpoints; doofus; fox; foxbashing; foxnews; looser; mccarthywasright; murdochbashing; propaganda; ratslie; smarmyliberal; talkshow; traitors; treason; tvshow
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A wildly liberal review of Al Franken v. Fox case, but with some good nuggets: Ann is called "Killer Barbie"--I think she'd like that; a proposed Al Franken v. Ann Coulter show--I'd love to see it, but I think it'd be boring for the general public seeing Al get beaten up. But Ann may make up for that. What do you think?
I report, you decide.
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Have an e-mail for this schlub?
2
posted on
09/04/2003 11:13:53 AM PDT
by
sauropod
("How do you know Sheila Jackson Lee's a queen?" "Because she doesn't sit with the little people")
To: Forgiven_Sinner
If it's the ballerina Ron Reagan jr., I'll claw my eyes out and Van Gogh my ears. What a loser. Can Franken hold up a little better against Coulter than Ron Jr.?
3
posted on
09/04/2003 11:14:37 AM PDT
by
kinghorse
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Patriotism is cheesy, according to this creep. Isn't that nice?
Coulter is way out of Franken's league. She'd have him whimpering before the end of the first episode.
4
posted on
09/04/2003 11:20:49 AM PDT
by
alnick
To: kinghorse
My money is on Ann. Franken isn't good under pressure and Ann would fry him. It would be worth it just to watch Franken spriral into the ceiling.
5
posted on
09/04/2003 11:24:27 AM PDT
by
mbynack
To: alnick
Al Franken is a liar, just like all the other "mainstream" liberals. They lie to get out their agenda, they bend the truth to their will, and the majority of them are hypocrites.
6
posted on
09/04/2003 11:24:57 AM PDT
by
FredWolfe
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Leave it up to this liberal-lover to distort the facts. Notice the mention that Coulter's book is #47 on Amazon? Yeah, NOW. What about when it first came out?
Or how about accusing Alan Colmes of being the most liberal voice on the network? Riiiiight. Alan doesn't get me half as angry as the regular contributions of, say, Susan Estrich or Eleanor Clift.
Ultimately, it sounds like another sore loser that Fox News is gaining popularity. Too bad, so sad. Who's crying now?
7
posted on
09/04/2003 11:25:04 AM PDT
by
bolobaby
To: Forgiven_Sinner
I fear a franken vs Couler show would devolce into a weekly screaming match. I have heard that Franken gets unhinged when cornered and things don't go his way.
To: bolobaby
9
posted on
09/04/2003 11:28:17 AM PDT
by
bolobaby
To: sauropod
10
posted on
09/04/2003 11:36:38 AM PDT
by
Forgiven_Sinner
(Praying for the Kingdom of God.)
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Tonight. When i get home from work ;-).
11
posted on
09/04/2003 11:38:19 AM PDT
by
sauropod
("How do you know Sheila Jackson Lee's a queen?" "Because she doesn't sit with the little people")
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Defending a trademark is hardly the same as trying to stop him from publishing ANY book. This free speech defense is crap.
If I wrote a book called "Live from New York, It's Saturday Night and Al Franken still sucks" I suspect that NBC would want me to change the title as well.
12
posted on
09/04/2003 11:40:14 AM PDT
by
ko_kyi
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Coulter v. Franken? Hmmmm? At first blush it sounds interesting, but like all liberals, Al Franken is long on assertions & short on facts. Coulter would slice him 'n dice him.
13
posted on
09/04/2003 11:51:55 AM PDT
by
Tallguy
(Just taking life with a grain of salt....oh, and a slice of lime and a shot of tequila...)
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Ciro Scotti
To: All
Bullies always whimper when they get the bejeezus beat out of them, especially by a nerdy-looking guy with glasses [Franken's comedic persona], and especially when such a big crowd is watching the fisticuffs. Au contrair! I seem to recall a recent blurb on NewsMax relating how Franken did an in-your-face challenge to a group of Fox folks at some correspondents dinner, and that Franken was later seen nursing a bloody nose.
To: ko_kyi
Defending a trademark is hardly the same as trying to stop him from publishing ANY book. This free speech defense is crap. If I wrote a book called "Live from New York, It's Saturday Night and Al Franken still sucks" I suspect that NBC would want me to change the title as well.
Good point. Franken's book jacket also has photos of TV's, tuned to Fox News and showing Bill O'Reilly among others. It does seem O'Reilly would have a case against his literal image being used to promote Franken's book?!
16
posted on
09/04/2003 12:13:22 PM PDT
by
88keys
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Bullies always whimper when they get the bejeezus beat out of them, especially by a nerdy-looking guy with glasses [Franken's comedic persona],....I have news for you, that's no "comedic persona," that is really him. The fairy in the pink sweater with all the 16 step programs was a comedic persona. Then again........
To: Forgiven_Sinner
Why not a political shouting show that pits Franken against one of Fox's conservative firebrands?Excellent idea. Pit Franken against Dennis Miller.
Money couldn't buy that kind of entertainment.
18
posted on
09/04/2003 12:32:19 PM PDT
by
skeeter
(Fac ut vivas)
To: ko_kyi
thats a great idea. Maybe the guy who wrote Al Franken is a buck-toothed moron could use that title for his follow-up.
19
posted on
09/04/2003 12:32:50 PM PDT
by
Charlie OK
(If you are a Christian, please drive like one!)
To: Forgiven_Sinner
The Killer Barbies are a band (that has been around in Spain for over 6 years). He probably overheard it from his kids (they are slowly getting introduced to America, their film came out on US DVD last year).
20
posted on
09/04/2003 12:39:32 PM PDT
by
weegee
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