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The USS Constitution (Humor)

Posted on 08/31/2003 6:44:39 PM PDT by annyokie

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To: annyokie
I know this is a phony, because the log of the United States Frigate Constitution would never refer to her as "U.S.S." but as "U.S.F." The story is cute, but probably apocryphal.

Congressman Billybob

Latest column, "In the Justices We Trust?" posted on FR, other publication to come.

41 posted on 08/31/2003 8:23:36 PM PDT by Congressman Billybob ("Don't just stand there. Run for Congress." www.ArmorforCongress.com)
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To: annyokie
First the water.

(48,600 - 38,600 =10,000) gallons of fresh water / for her crew of 475 = 21.05 gallons per man for the trip.

Nov (13)+Dec (31)+Jan (31) +Feb (20) = 95 days for the trip.

21.05 gal/man / 95 days = 0.2216 gal/day/man or 28.36 ounces/day/man

That’s almost a quart a day.

Now the booze.

79,400 gallons of rum + 68,300 gallons of rum + 64,300 gallons of Portuguese wine + 40,000 gallons of single malt Scotch = 252,000 gallons of booze.

This works out to 5.58 gal/day/man

It appears, the US Navy must have donated the booze to the British Navy before attacking, There is no way the US crew could have drunk this amount of booze.

42 posted on 08/31/2003 8:25:15 PM PDT by LoneRangerMassachusetts
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To: ladyjane
My favorite story about the USS Constitution is a Massachusetts story:

At the beginning of the Civil War, the railroads and telegraph to Washington were cut from the North. The first volunteer troops to arrive to relieve Washington were from Massachusetts. Arrangements had been made for them to be sent to Washington even before they were called by Benjamin Butler.

Above Baltimore, rail cars were put on a ferry to cross the Susquehanna. The Ferry boat captain told Butler that the rails were out to Baltimore, so Butler loaded his troops on the ferry boat 'Maryland' and went down the bay to Annapolis. They anchored off the Naval Academy in the night, and Butler sent his brother ashore to find anyone he could.

In the dawn, out came a small boat with his brother and the Commandant of the Naval Academy. Here is Butler's account of the exchange:

" Just as day was breaking, Captin Haggerty came back with my brother and Commodore Blake. I invited the commodore to the quarter-deck where we could be alone. and told him who I was, and why I was there, and asked what he desired.

The old man burst into tears, and shed them like rain for a moment, and then broke out:- "Thank God! thank God! Won't you save the Constitution?"

I did not know that he referred to the ship Constitution, and I answered:- "Yes, that is what I am here for."

"Are those your orders? Then the old ship is safe."

"I have no orders," said I; "I am carrying on the war now on my own hook;" I cut loose from my orders when I left Philadelphia. What do you want me to do to save the Constitution?"

'I want some sailor men,' he answered, 'for I have no sailors' I want to get her out, and get her afloat.

"Oh, well," said I, "I have plenty of sailor men from the town of Marblehead, where their fathers built the Constitution."

"Well," said he, "can you stop and help me?"

"I must stop," I replied. "I can go no further at present, and I propose to stop here and hold this town."

...........

" Immediately after breakfast, I detailed a company, the Salem Zouaves, Captain Deveraux, the best drilled company I had, as guard on board the Constitution. I also detailed a company of Marbleheaders, who were fishermen, to help work the ship under the command of Lieutenant (afterwards Admiral) Rogers. He worked with a will, and I shall never forget my delight at his efficieny. He ransferred all the upper deck guns and their carriages on board the Maryland, thus lighting the Ship. We got up her anchors, which were several feet deep in the mud, and after very strenuous efforts on the part of all of us, the Constitution, attached to the Maryland, was worked around and down the bay into deep water."

Thus was the Constitution saved.

43 posted on 08/31/2003 8:34:18 PM PDT by Held_to_Ransom
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To: Congressman Billybob
http://www.ussconstitution.navy.mil/

In 1997, after a 4 year overhaul in which her original strength was reinstated, having been lessened by earlier "renewal work", the USS Constitution sailed under her own sail power for the first time in over 100 years. The only time I've been aboard her was during that overhaul, in 1993. April 18th to be exact.
44 posted on 08/31/2003 9:42:24 PM PDT by El Gato (Federal Judges can twist the Constitution into anything.. or so they think.)
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To: facedown
Awesome image! Post more, please...
45 posted on 08/31/2003 10:46:32 PM PDT by A. Goodwin
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To: The Mayor
Great story. Fun read.
46 posted on 09/01/2003 12:56:44 AM PDT by Kathy in Alaska (God Bless America and Our Troops Who Protect Her!)
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To: LoneRangerMassachusetts
It appears, the US Navy must have donated the booze to the British Navy before attacking, There is no way the US crew could have drunk this amount of booze.

You, my good man, must never have made a port call to Subic Bay, Phillippines!

Seriously, though, it is JUST A STORY!

47 posted on 09/01/2003 8:32:38 AM PDT by WestPacSailor (We are Microsoft. Resistance is futile! You will be assimilated.)
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To: El Gato
the USS Constitution sailed under her own sail power for the first time in over 100 years.

Now THAT would have been uber-cool!

48 posted on 09/01/2003 9:52:38 AM PDT by WestPacSailor (We are Microsoft. Resistance is futile! You will be assimilated.)
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