The USS Constitution (Humor)

[annyokie]

The U.S.S. Constitution (Old Ironsides) as a combat vessel carried 48,600 gallons of fresh water for her crew of 475 officers and men. This was sufficient to last six months of sustained operations at sea. She carried no evaporators (i.e. fresh water distillers!). However, let it be noted that according to her log, "On July 27, 1798, the U.S.S. Constitution sailed from Boston with a full complement of 475 officers and men, 48,600 gallons of fresh water, 7,400 cannon shot, 11,600 pounds of black powder and 79,400 gallons of rum."

Her mission: "To destroy and harass English shipping." Making Jamaica on 6 October, she took on 826 pounds of flour and 68,300 gallons of rum. Then she headed for the Azores, arriving there 12 November. She provisioned with 550 pounds of beef and 64,300 gallons of Portuguese wine.

On 18 November, she set sail for England. In the ensuing days she defeated five British men-of-war and captured and scuttled 12 English merchantships, salvaging only the rum aboard each. By 26 January, her powder and shot were exhausted. Nevertheless, although unarmed she made a night raid up the Firth of Clyde in Scotland. Her landing party captured a whisky distillery and transferred 40,000 gallons of single malt Scotch aboard by dawn. Then she headed home.

The U.S.S. Constitution arrived in Boston on 20 February, 1799, with no cannon shot, no food, no powder, no rum, no wine, no whisky and 38,600 gallons of stagnant water.

GO NAVY!

[annyokie]

No offense Navy! Gimme those Army jokes!

Happy Holiday Weekend, ya'll!

[1stFreedom]

>>of single malt Scotch aboard by dawn

Wohoooo! I'll drink to that!

[Lunatic Fringe]

LOL! Nearly twice as much rum than fresh water... Colonial America was full of drunks.

[nicollo]

This was one of my Grandfather's favorite stories! He'd read it to us every Thanksgiving and Christmas, and laugh like hell. (This, after a few martinis, mind you.)

A classic. Thanks for sharing it!

[tlb]

The to and fro course of the ship wasn't due to tacking into the wind. They just couldn't sail a straight line.

[tlb]

The to and fro course of the ship wasn't due to tacking into the wind. They just couldn't sail a straight line.

[nicollo]

This was one of my Grandfather's favorite stories! He'd read it to us every Thanksgiving and Christmas, and laugh like hell. (This, after a few martinis, mind you.)

A classic. Thanks for sharing it!

[jws3sticks]

Sounds like Wednesday Night at the Races off Grosse Ile, Michigan. LOL. Some 'barley pops', too.

[annyokie]

You're very welcome!

[The Mayor]

Thanks, great story , haha..

[The Mayor]

you'll like this!

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

What crap. We were not fighting the British then and would not for 14 more years. Add to that how little water these guys are said to be drinking and the amount of rum all in Carribean waters and it doesn't add up.

[Iris7]

Being an old swab, at first I took this story at face value, but then decided I had to run the numbers!

Even with only the first load of 79,400 gallons of rum, and 475 officers and men, that is 167 gallons per man. They were gone about seven months for 24 gallons of rum per man per month. With thirty day months this is about three quarts and six fluid ounces per day per man. This is a lot of booze even for a Navy man! Especially kept up every day for seven months! And doesn't include all the other booze!

The average enlisted swab hardly ever drinks more than two quarts of booze a day! More is excessive! Story isn't true!

Wait! I know why the numbers don't come out! The OFFICERS drank all of that booze over two quarts per man! Of course! Case closed!

[annyokie]

It's a STORY! Were you there? Lighten up, already.

[facedown]

A finer boat has never floated.

[annyokie]

Personal experience, eh, Cap't? ; )

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

It's a STORY! Were you there? Lighten up, already.

It would be a better story if it had ANY bases in fact... and yes I was there.

[annyokie]

Very nice! Thanks!

[annyokie]

Curmudgeon Award for you, indeed!

So, WHO drank all the booze, me friend? : )

[HoustonCurmudgeon]

So, WHO drank all the booze, me friend? : )

My vote is for the guy who made up the story! ;-)