[SouthernHawk]

ROTFL ! ! ! !

"Out of the mouthes of babes!" Those were great! My turn to rush to the e-mail!

[tomkow6]

A man walks into a Silicon Valley pet store looking to buy a monkey. The
store owner points towards three identical looking monkeys in
politically-correct, animal-friendly natural mini-habitats.

"The one on the left costs $500," says the store owner.

"Why so much?" asks the customer.

"Because it can program in C," answers the store owner.

The customer inquires about the next monkey and is told, "That one costs
$1500, because it knows Visual C++ and Object-Relational technology."

The startled man then asks about the third monkey. "That one costs
$3000," answers the store owner.

"3000 dollars!!" exclaims the man. "What can that one do?"

To which the owner replies, "To be honest, I've never seen it do a
single thing, but it calls itself a Consultant."

[Kathy in Alaska]

Another attempt.....I think I've seen this one before....

Marriage Communication

While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Tom and his wife Peg listened to the instructor declare, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."

He addressed the men., "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?" Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently, and whispered, "Pillsbury All-Purpose, isn't it?"

The rest of the story is not pleasant.