These aren't the druids you're looking for.
Posted on 08/11/2003 3:07:34 PM PDT by Constitutionalist Conservative
Druids have been brought in to reduce the number of accidents on Austria's worst stretches of autobahn.
The Druids have put up huge roadside monoliths to restore the natural flow of "earth energy". After the massive pillars of white quartz were put up beside a notorious stretch of road during a secret two-year trial, the number of fatal accidents fell from an average of six a year to zero.
Gerald Knobloch, who describes himself as an archdruid, used a divining rod to inspect the 300-yard stretch of the A9 in Styria and restore "earth energy lines". "I located dangerous elements that had disrupted the energy flow," he told The Telegraph.
"The worst was a river which human interference had forced to flow against its natural direction. By erecting two stones of quartz each weighing more than a ton at the side of the road the energy lines were restored."
The pillars had a similar function to acupuncture, he said. "Acupuncture needles also restore broken energy lines. What acupuncture does for the body, the stones do for the environment."
Harald Dirnbacher, an engineer from the motorway authority, admitted that they turned to Mr Knobloch as a last resort. "We had put up signs to reduce speed, renewed the road surface and made bends more secure but we still kept getting accidents," he said. "At that point we couldn't think of anything else to do and decided we might as well try anything.
"I admit when we first looked at it [energy lines] we were doubtful. We didn't want people to know in case they laughed at us, so we kept the trial secret and small-scale. But it was really an amazing turnaround."
Scientists are sceptical of the claims. "Natural sciences need evidence. Whatever can't be measured, does not exist," said Dr Georg Walach, a geophysics professor at Leoben University in southern Austria. "These energy lines and their flow cannot be grasped or measured, and their existence is therefore rejected by scientists."
However, the motorway authorities are extending the Druids' role across the country, paying them about £2,500 for each investigation - a fraction of the cost of resurfacing a road. "Of course, the fall in accidents could be due to something else, as we are continuously repairing the roads," said Mr Dirnbacher.
I don't care if they tied shoes to trees. 12 people are alive today that would be dead otherwise. Hey, whatever works...
Too late. We're laughing.
These aren't the druids you're looking for.
...let alone like a Druish Princess.
Typical elitist sentiment. Like science has discovered everything about everything.
And, just to insert a little plug, I'm willing to install my ElephantGuard(tm) Pachy-Matic TSS-2000 Transportation Safety System on any U.S. highway for a modest fee. For a mere $1.54 per linear foot of roadway, we will travel to any highway in the United States and install the guards (minimum bid $50,000.00). We assure our customers of quiet, nodisruptive and discreet installation (typically late at night), to avoid unnecessary panic on the part of highway users
Coincidentally enough, and the reason I mention this here, we also offer, starting today, for a few dollars more per linear foot, to perform an energy line survey and install the necessary components to maximize balance and harmony for any road surface.
Work orders and purchase orders from all levels of government, as well as select private parties, are cheerfully accepted.
Imal R. Shakeen
President and CEO
ElephantGuard Technologies, Inc.
So true!
"...used a divining rod to inspect the 300-yard stretch..."
This has always facinated me. Most people have the ability of dowsing and don't know it. No 'scientist' has ever been able to explain it, but it works.............FRegards
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.