Nice to have a girlfriend who keeps your self-esteem up.
Along with other things, that is.
Posted on 07/17/2003 3:21:52 PM PDT by Willie Green
For education and discussion only. Not for commercial use.
Dockers recently came out with a new brand of pants, the Go Khakis, which promise to keep your legs stain-free using revolutionary nanotechnology. We couldn't help thinking that Dockers might be using the word "nanotechnology" more for marketing muscle than for true scientific purposes, so we called its customer service line to ask a few pointed questions. Here's a slice of the conversation.
Dockers: How can I help you today?
Popular Science: I just bought a pair of the Go Khakis, and I noticed it says they use something called nanotechnology for stain resistance. Can you please explain how that works?
D: Umm, it's, uh, DuPont Teflon coating, and basically what we're asking you to do is not to use powdered detergent and press them after every fifth wash, and dry cleaning is an option also. And do not use fabric softener, because it can interfere with that stain-defending property.
PS: Great, but can you explain what makes this nanotechnology rather than just a coating? What is nanotechnology?
D: One moment please. Did you get the pleated or flat-front?
PS: Flat-front.
D: OK, one moment please. Because the one that says nanotechnology is the versatile pant that wicks moisture away from you.
PS: It says nanotechnology repels stains.
D: OK, one moment please. Can you give me a style number off that?
PS: Sorry, I don't have it with me. But it was a "stain defender," and I believe it said "Go Khaki."
D: And that was the flat-front one.
PS: I believe so.
D: OK, I believe it does say nanotechnology because it's the 60-cotton, 40-micropoly blend.
PS: So that's where the nanotechnology comes in?
D: Uh-huh.
PS: I still don't understand. Are there microscopic machines repelling the stain? How does it work?
D: Umm . . . I guess it's the type of fabric that makes it the nano.
PS: So the "nano" has more to do with the size of the fibers? And water is small enough to get through for washing, but other liquids are not—they bead up and roll off?
D: You know, I'm really not sure, but I do know they'll come clean. My kid has a pair of these. Messy kid. So I got the shirt and pants, and he's doing great with them. You just need to remember to press after every fifth wash.
PS: But would you say the stain defender was the Teflon coating or the size of the fibers?
D: It's a Teflon finish on the pants.
PS: So is nanotechnology affecting the stain resistance?
D: I would say not. I need to help other customers, ma'am. Can I ask how you got the number to call us today?
PS: 1-800-DOCKERS? Lucky guess.
It doesn't. Except to Jenny Everett who is a graduate of the Humpty Dumpty School of Journalism
nanotechnology
/nan'-oh-tek-no"l*-jee/ Any fabrication technology in which objects are designed and built by the specification and placement of individual atoms or molecules or where at least one dimension is on a scale of nanometers.
Nice to have a girlfriend who keeps your self-esteem up.
Along with other things, that is.
Carl: So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock.So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking.
So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one---big hitter, the Lama---long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga.
So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consiousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
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