I became friends with a young lady from church, and sensed that there might be something "special," that perhaps the Lord was calling us to be partners for life.
After our friendship was pretty solid, I asked her if she was interested in together determining whether or not it was the Lord's will for us to be married. We called that "courting." During our courtship, we were exclusive in the sense that we didn't express any long-term relational interest in others, but we didn't do the things that are common on most dating relationships. We didn't kiss; we didn't even hold hands. It wasn't about me meeting my emotional/romantic desires, or meeting hers, but about discerning whether the Lord was calling us to be husband and wife.
After 4 months of this, getting to know each other more deeply, praying about it, seeking the counsel of people we trust, I asked her to marry me. It was pretty romantic, on the beach. She said, "Yes, of course." And that was the first night we held hands.
Four months later, we were married, and when the pastor said, "You may kiss your bride" ... well, I received "permission" to do so ... and we kissed for the first time.
What I believe this story, and the author's story, is saying is that it is do-able. That single people have alternatives to "dating." That you can get married and have no regrets. I don't feel guilty about a single thing my wife and I did before we got married. Purity. Innocence. It's quite nice.
I'm not demanding that others do this. But I'm letting others know that it is do-able, and that it was a wonderful way to grow closer, to discern God's will, and to start a faithful relationship.
Ted
BTW, I'm not the cliched geeky, holier-than-thou type. I'm a pretty normal guy, a musician in a band (keyboard player), do video editing, and am a front-end software developer (among other things)
(photos of us: http://www.ijot.com/ashleigh)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Good one!
Lincoln had his own problems with dating and courtship. His marriage to Mary Todd was no picnic either.