Do you have gas? (levity? alert)

Convience stores and restaurants | 5/7/2003 | self

[ODDITHER]

Lately, it seems that the command of the english language, by some in the service industry, is somewhat lacking. ALthough I realize that most service workers are victims of a public school education, I find it more and more difficult to answer their questions, without asking questions of my own. Below are a few of examples.

When entering a restaurants I am asked the following question.-

"Do you have a smoking preference?" The first few times I was asked this question, I gave them the answer they wear looking for. I now answer the question the way it is presented.

Well, If pot was legal, that would be my preference, but since it isn't I prefer pipes.

Is there just one in your Party? Now, I am sure this question is meant to avoid questions such as "Are you alone?" or "don't you have any friends?, but don't you need more than one person to have a party?

My all time favorite is asked in convience stores - When approaching the checkout stand the following question tends to come up.

Do you have gas? or Did you have gas today?

I now answer this, with "aren't you getting a little personal?"

Can you imagine, being from a foreign country and trying to interpret these questions?

[gcruse]

When the Clinton Whitehouse travel office booked flights for the first traitor, Air Force One always asked if he wanted gumming or nongumming.

[Still Thinking]

y favorite is in the checkout line when the checker or bagger says "you have a good one" (as in day). I respond, "Why yes I do, thanks for noticing."

I love that one myself. I've been using it for years.

[ODDITHER]

I earned my way through college as a waitress in a restaurant. One day when I went up to take a man's order, he said do you have frog legs? when I answered yes, he said "well then hop back into the kitchen and get me a steak."

When my mother was a little girl they would go into the grocery stores and ask if they had Prince Albert in a can, when the store clerk would answer yes they would say "well you better let him out so he can breath."