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| ABE
Posted on 04/01/2003 7:28:58 PM PST by ABE
War Protestors Flood Gondor, Denethor Flees
MINAS TIRITH (Gondor News Network) - Thousands of peace activists took to the streets of Minas Tirith and other cities of Middle Earth today to protest what they termed a rush to war with Mordor.
"We need more time for diplomacy," said a key member of the Middle Earth Security Council, Saruman the White. "I am not convinced by the evidence presented by my esteemed colleague, Gandalf the Grey, or that the Dark Lord Sauron presents an imminent danger to the peoples of the West."
Many of the people protesting war in Mordor agreed with Saruman's remarks. "Sauron says he's destroyed his Rings of Mass Destruction (RMD) and that's good enough for me," said one fellow carrying a sign that said, "Elrond is a Balrog."
Another demonstrator urged, "Give the RMD inspectors more time. There's no reason to rush to any judgment just because Mount Doom is belching lava, the Dark Tower is rebuilt, and Osgiliath has been decimated."
A third protester piped up, "I haven't heard a single bit of convincing evidence connecting the Nazgul with Sauron. I think they destroyed Osgiliath on their own initiative without any support from Sauron. Besides, it's understandable they're angry with Gondor. We haven't done nearly as much for the Orcs and Goblins and Easterlings as the Nazgul and Sauron have. It's understandable they throw their support to them. It's our own fault really."
As the protesters continued their march through the city, they chanted, "No blood for Mount Doom," voicing a common sentiment that the leaders of the Western peoples are really seeking to get their hands on the powerful Mount Doom, where the One Ring of Power was allegedly forged.
Gandalf the Grey was unavailable for comment. A spokesman said he was in an undisclosed underground location, which sources codenamed "Moria."
TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: humor; iraqifreedom; lotr; satire
For all of the Lord Of The Rings fans out there.
1
posted on
04/01/2003 7:28:58 PM PST
by
ABE
To: ABE; HairOfTheDog; ecurbh
Funny post!
2
posted on
04/01/2003 7:33:34 PM PST
by
Bear_in_RoseBear
(Am I awake, or am I dreaming?)
To: ABE
LOL! Ecurbh will be along to ping the ringers.... they will enjoy it!
3
posted on
04/01/2003 7:36:08 PM PST
by
HairOfTheDog
(May it be a light for you in dark places, when all other lights go out.)
To: ABE
Would that make Arnett Gollum? Seems fitting. Thought that would mean that Arnett would die biting on some Ring of Mask Destruction. Hmmmm.
4
posted on
04/01/2003 7:40:01 PM PST
by
struggle
((The struggle continues))
To: ABE
AHAHAHAHAHA!! ROTFLOL! Bookmarked! ***^-^***
5
posted on
04/01/2003 7:44:59 PM PST
by
4mycountry
(Anyone can be average---it takes something special to be weird. I am honored to be weird.)
To: ABE
Frodo will save the day, and Gandalf will survive Moria, the protesters are full of themselves. They'll be sorry later, when they won't be appreciated by the Nosgul. They will probably be decimated or else turned into Orks. I wish this was true. We could turn all the protesters into orks.
6
posted on
04/01/2003 7:46:33 PM PST
by
Ethyl
To: Bear_in_RoseBear; 24Karet
LOL!
7
posted on
04/01/2003 7:52:20 PM PST
by
Notforprophet
(All rights reversed)
To: ABE
I just realized how much Peter Arnett looks like Gollum...
8
posted on
04/01/2003 7:55:07 PM PST
by
Mudcat
To: struggle; Mudcat
Well, just as an fyi, Gollum falls of a cliff with the ring and dies is the volcano. The ring gets melted and everyone is ok again. --Well, except Frodo. Poor Frodo......lost his finger. Gollum bit it off or something. *sniff*
9
posted on
04/01/2003 8:08:36 PM PST
by
4mycountry
(Anyone can be average---it takes something special to be weird. I am honored to be weird.)
To: ABE
Good tale. I think we have begun to destroy Saddam's "Ring Of Power".
10
posted on
04/01/2003 8:15:29 PM PST
by
kcordell
To: ABE
Very funny!
11
posted on
04/01/2003 8:28:31 PM PST
by
rmt65802
To: ABE
Awesome!
12
posted on
04/01/2003 8:40:15 PM PST
by
ILBBACH
(Semper Fi)
To: HairOfTheDog
LOL! Ecurbh will be along to ping the ringers...Actually this has been posted and pinged before. I have it up on the Hobbit Hole website too.
13
posted on
04/02/2003 12:02:36 AM PST
by
ecurbh
(HHD)
To: ABE
Good stuff
14
posted on
06/15/2003 6:45:28 PM PDT
by
rb22982
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