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DFU SONG: Teenager in Love (in love with Scott Ritter)
DFU SONG PARODIES | 1-2003 | Lyrics, Doug from Upland

Posted on 01/22/2003 10:07:38 AM PST by doug from upland

NOTE: although I make light of this and some might think there was no harm no foul because he really didn't meet a little girl, child stalkers need to do serious jail time and perhaps be chemically castrated. If William Scott Ritter Junior is really innocent and the perp is another guy, then this song is about the other guy named Scott Ritter who was arrested twice. Parents, do you know what your child is doing on the Internet? You had better know.

==================================

MIDI - TEENAGER IN LOVE

I just turned 14 years old…I love the Internet
I chat with older guys who sure make my panties wet

Some day we'll meet down at Burger King
Where I'll watch Scotty Ritter doing his thing

My mom and daddy warned me that men are sometimes sick
I'm really hoping he's…perverted like Slick

Some day we'll meet down at Burger King
Where I'll watch Scotty Ritter doing his thing

I'm really excited…we had another long chat
He says he's ambidextrous…oh, I can't wait for that

I had Mel Reynolds call me once from inside his prison cell
He said the day he's getting out…he wants me to ring his bell

Some day we'll meet down at Burger King
Where I'll watch Scotty Ritter doing his thing

I'm really excited…we had another long chat
He says he's ambidextrous…oh, I can't wait for that

His co-author I wish he'd bring…I would like to watch two men
That is, if he can find the time…he's busy on CNN

Some day we'll meet down at Burger King
Where I'll watch Scotty Ritter doing his thing
Where I'll watch Scotty Ritter doing his thing
Where I'll watch Scotty Ritter doing his thing


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Foreign Affairs; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: iraq; looneybin; pervert; saddamtoy; wmd
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To: duckln; doug from upland
there's no point trilling yourself by appling triple kangaroo punishment.

Sorry, make that 'thrilling'. Well, how about 'entertaining'?

21 posted on 01/22/2003 11:05:20 AM PST by duckln
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To: techcor
He's made himself quite a target of parody.
22 posted on 01/22/2003 11:11:31 AM PST by doug from upland (May the Clintons live their remaining days in orange jumpsuits)
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To: duckln
"No, not at all. It seems that priests are persecuted to ridiculous ends as is the case with Ridder."

I seems to ME that priests were persecuted to ridiculous ends, whether guilty or innocent, dead and unable to defend themselves or alive, and Democrat moral hypocrisy in the media turned the procedings into a shameful Inquisition, causing the Church to settle every case quickly and out of court...and at the end, neither priests not the Church were offering even a token defense. Perhaps they were all guilty...perhaps, as I believe, some were innocent victims of the left's newest ploy to destroy the Christian foundations of this country...unfortunately, we may never know of any innocents, even if they exist, because of the anti-Christian and anti-Catholic (some of which came from Christians of other sects) media propaganda circus surrounding all the new, daily accusations, which came at near light speed until the public didn't know WHAT to believe anymore.

HOWEVER, in Ritter's case, there WAS NO RIDICULE until conservatives got wind of it, even though the details of RITTER'S case were more clear and better documented. HIS case was SEALED: COVERED UP for TWO YEARS. If it had never BEEN uncovered, he could have done it again and been a three time loser...but only been charged for a first offense as though he had no record if the next court didn't catch wind of the PRIOR. All the while, he would have been preaching to "impeach Bush" and "Saddam's innocent" to the world from his bully pulpit of phoney moral superiority - a platform bsed on a lie - and affecting international policy and possibly the fate of the free world.

Why did the left so gleefully persecute priests? Why is the left NOW so VIGOROUSLY defending Ritter, who was caught red handed because he had HOPED he had lured an underaged girl to satisfy his sick desires??

Why the double standard from the left wing???

23 posted on 01/22/2003 11:18:26 AM PST by cake_crumb (What would we do without FR? Don't wait to find out. Become a monthly donor.)
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To: doug from upland
Gee. I love my wife and kids

I read Scotty has a wife and 2 kids!

As my son-in-law heads for the Gulf on the USS ROOSEVELT, I take this stuff personally

And I don't? Why screw around with some alledged picadillo?

You're not a 14-year-old on mommy's computer, are you?

If you multiply that by 5, you would be closer, but still shy. Now that you have that little tid bit, start ridiculing me as an old fart, it's your apparent style. Like your 'parody', you're off base and ugly in tone.

24 posted on 01/22/2003 11:32:00 AM PST by duckln
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To: doug from upland
May your son-in-law come home safe and whole after Saddam is successfully removed from power.
25 posted on 01/22/2003 11:32:04 AM PST by cake_crumb (What would we do without FR? Don't wait to find out. Become a monthly donor.)
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To: duckln
Oh. I was impressed when I thought you knew that trill was a real word. Now I find out that it was one more word which didn't make it through spellcheck.
26 posted on 01/22/2003 11:33:36 AM PST by doug from upland (May the Clintons live their remaining days in orange jumpsuits)
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To: duckln
You started this battle by calling be "worst" than Ritter. Ritter was caught twice, trying to meet with a 14-year-old and a 16-year-old. He was trolling the internet to find young girls who wanted to watch him bleep himself. You have the nerve to say what you said to me and think I was going to sit back and take it? You were calling me "worst" than a child molester. Yes, I thought an appropriate response to that was ridicule. What would your response have been to charges like that?
27 posted on 01/22/2003 11:46:29 AM PST by doug from upland (May the Clintons live their remaining days in orange jumpsuits)
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To: cake_crumb
Thanks. We are confident that Josh will come home fine and Saddam will be gone soon. This president, with the proper use of force and threat of use of force, has an historic opportunity to liberate people suffering at the hands of a torturer and murderer. Let's hope the Middle East can someday become a place where people elect their leaders. We do not want to take over their oil. We would like to trade with them for the oil we need and see that their citizens benefit and quality of life is better because we buy their products. That is the America I know.
28 posted on 01/22/2003 11:49:55 AM PST by doug from upland (May the Clintons live their remaining days in orange jumpsuits)
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To: cake_crumb
Why the double standard from the left wing

Good post on your part. The media hates moralists, i.e. Catholic church. They like perverts, like Pee Wee, Rosie and maybe Ritter if he was a Democrat.

29 posted on 01/22/2003 11:51:25 AM PST by duckln
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To: duckln
"And I don't? Why screw around with some alledged picadillo?"

If you DID, you wouldn't be asking that question, for two reasons:

1:) There, but for the grace of God, could have been your child...or niece, or nephew, or grandchild...if it had been a real child Ritter had been luring, rather than an undercover officer.

2:) Ritter is turning a well planned international policy, backed by the muscle of the military, into a global powder keg backed by the likes of the group who wants to resurrect the regimes of Cold War communist dictators. Thus, if you DID have a son or daughter or in-law in the military and headed for the Gulf, it would be a no-brainer for you to guess your 'picadillo', who is not an elected official or serving in a diplomatic position is taking it upon himself endanger their lives. And the lives of many others.

Who gave Scott the right to play with the lives of our military and play with underaged girls? Why...the left wing, that's who.

War could have been averted...now it's far less likely to be because of the alleged 'anti-war' movement that Ritter helped start just so he could make money as a talking head and by selling a lousy book.

30 posted on 01/22/2003 11:52:35 AM PST by cake_crumb (What would we do without FR? Don't wait to find out. Become a monthly donor.)
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To: duckln
"They like perverts, like Pee Wee, Rosie and maybe Ritter if he was a Democrat."

So he's allegedly registered as a Republican...he's no conservative.

DEMOCRATS, like the rabid anti-war left-wingnuts at the DU, are defending Ritter. Most Republicans are not.

31 posted on 01/22/2003 11:58:50 AM PST by cake_crumb (What would we do without FR? Don't wait to find out. Become a monthly donor.)
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To: doug from upland
I have many cousins headed to the Gulf - and two of my kids are due to sign the paperwork to join the Air Force next month. I have to say, now that the truth obout just how much a monster Ritter is has hit the public, damaging his credibility with the rabid left-wingnuts who are his biggest supporters, I now have hope that they will all come home safe and whole.

I too hope that the Mideast may someday learn the value of peace and representative government. Neither of which will they ever have as long as Saddam is terrorizing the region. You're right: we don't want their oil. If this were about oil, we'd be drilling through the glass desert to get at it right now.

Thank Heaven for President Bush!

32 posted on 01/22/2003 12:06:55 PM PST by cake_crumb (What would we do without FR? Don't wait to find out. Become a monthly donor.)
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To: doug from upland
You were calling me "worst" than a child molester

No, I was calling you worse than Ritter. As I read the reports, there was no 'child' violated in this case. You put 'child' in there and not 'teenager'. You made yourself despicable in this case by taking on the mantle of 'accuser', judge, jury, and 'switch thrower'. Sir, you are not the 'legal' system, we already have one.

I'll copy this on a blank, have it spell checked before I post. But you are having no problem understanding what I'm irritated about. Dammit, I just ended in a preposition!

33 posted on 01/22/2003 12:12:55 PM PST by duckln
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To: cake_crumb
Saddam is terrorizing the region

Since Desert Storm, how so? Our war is against the Saudi created Islamists, spread over 60 countries.

Iraq is part of that cabal, and must be dealt with, preferably first. But Saddam is not a mullah, which are much more dangerous because of wanton 'suicide' attacks on Western culture.

Read Rage and Pride by Oriana Fallaci, if you haven't yet.

34 posted on 01/22/2003 12:29:34 PM PST by duckln
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To: duckln
"Since Desert Storm, how so?"

You mean besides murdering and starving his own people, I guess. Saddam is as mixed up in funding Wahhabi terrorists as the Saudi royal family. Saddam therefore, even if he didn't export terrorists themselves - I need proof that he isn't, and not even the UNweenies will go THAT far - still exports terrorism to every country in the region.

35 posted on 01/22/2003 1:04:36 PM PST by cake_crumb (What would we do without FR? Don't wait to find out. Become a monthly donor.)
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To: cake_crumb
Well, you're on the right side, but completly brainwashed. You believe your own rant with no evidence, but that's OK I guess if you're properly motivated.

Who's going to be your bog gee man if/when we 'invade' Iran, Saudia, Lybia, Egypt, Pakistan and maybe down the road Indonesia etc. After all, those countries don't have the 'dog in the fight' desire, ability or stomach to rout out 'WMD' para militaries. In the end, it will be up to us.

W said this will be a long, hard 'war', and you better bet on it.

36 posted on 01/22/2003 1:53:10 PM PST by duckln
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To: cake_crumb
You're arguing with a guy who thinks I am "worst" than Ritter, a twice caught child stalker. I don't think you will get through to him.
37 posted on 01/22/2003 4:01:36 PM PST by doug from upland (May the Clintons live their remaining days in orange jumpsuits)
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To: doug from upland
DFU,

Masterful, as always...

I'm reminded of another dity:

Hold the pickle
Yes I'll let you
I know it's small
Does that upset you?
Chat room sex
With minors lets you
Spank it your way

Spank it your way, in our car lot
Spank it your way...

(with apologies)
Bootyist
38 posted on 01/22/2003 4:15:02 PM PST by bootyist-monk
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To: dutchess; Looking4Truth; solzhenitsyn; Paul Atreides; rockfish59; StarFan; RobFromGa; whoever; ...
Ping list.
39 posted on 01/22/2003 5:24:27 PM PST by doug from upland (May the Clintons live their remaining days in orange jumpsuits)
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To: doug from upland
Methinks someone might need a phonics refresher.

Those last few posts bordered on being
unlebigble
illegiimable
ugammatikal
mizpeld

......well....anyway....there was something wrong.

40 posted on 01/22/2003 5:37:31 PM PST by Focault's Pendulum (Boom Shakalaka Boom Shakalaka)
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