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Tim Blair: The awful truth? It's a crock (Bowling for Columbine)
The Australian ^ | Dec 30, 2002 | Tim Blair

Posted on 12/29/2002 5:19:30 PM PST by beckett

Tim Blair: The awful truth? It's a crock



December 30, 2002

CHILDREN'S television is quite an art. It's not just a matter of throwing together simple tunes, basic storylines and bright colours. Successful children's TV also requires the presence of a large, formless creature, an entity usually combining equal elements of human and bovine. The cow-beast is crucial.

So it is with Bowling for Columbine, Michael Moore's Cannes-winning documentary on the wrongs of guns, capitalism, and America, now screening in Australia. The simple tunes and basic storylines are in place. Moore himself plays the Dorothy the Dinosaur role, clumsily loping about in pursuit of Bad Guys. It's a kid flick for the adult anti-American market.

Moore manipulates this market so expertly that you anticipate fans squealing "Go Mikey!" every time he plods smugly into frame. Fans like The Age's Stephanie Bunbury: "Isn't that great, you think with a huge sigh of relief as you see him bearing down, amiable but inexorable, on the next feral gun owner or racist lunatic. Go Mikey!"

Yay! Margaret Pomeranz of SBS's Movie Show awarded Columbine five stars, and also got into the toddler spirit: "Moore shambles around with his baseball cap on, his stomach hanging out; almost a teddy bear figure, Moore seems to encompass so much that's terribly important in the world today with the United States on the brink of yet another international gun expedition." Movie Show co-presenter (and film reviewer for The Australian) David Stratton detected vast importance, too: "It's a sobering film, but never a dull one, thanks to the brilliance of Moore's sometimes scatological approach to a profoundly important subject."

The subject is obviously so profoundly important that no local reviewer has been bothered to report the controversy in the US over Columbine's inaccuracies and distortions. Journalists have a damned nerve charging people money for less information than is available free on the internet. Writing about Columbine without addressing its flaws is like writing about Michael Jackson without mentioning that these days he looks like an albino bat.

A mind given to conspiracy theories might conclude that an element of cover-up is involved. For the record, and because you apparently won't read it elsewhere in the Australian press, here is a brief list of things believed wrong about Columbine, from sources ranging from Salon.com and Forbes to London's Sunday Times (these and more may be found at www.moorewatch.com):

No wonder Moore is so popular in France, where Thierry Meyssan's book Effroyable Imposture (which argued that September 11 was engineered by the American government) became a bestseller.

Some of his reviewer/fans share Moore's accuracy problems. Bunbury claimed that "he bails up the entire management of Kmart and confronts Charlton Heston on his own front veranda" although he meets only a few Kmart management types and interviews Heston inside his house; and The Australian's Jane Cornwell wrote that Columbine's vile three-minute cartoon history of the US, written by Moore and made by animators FlickerLab, was produced "by the guys from South Park".

Just as wrong are reviewers' standard lines about Moore "taking on big business" and "standing up for the little guy". Moore usually stands up to the little guy, bullying sales staff and humiliating small-town folk. At the cinema where I saw Columbine, a typically open-minded and compassionate inner-city crowd giggled indulgently as Moore (aided by sneaky editing) made fools of police, PR flacks, the unemployed, the undereducated and the working class.

Millionaire Moore – who is to working class as French is to resistance, despite once spending one entire day on the Buick assembly line in his hometown of Flint, Michigan – is waging a class war, but it's against the rubes and hicks he claims to represent. They are mere joke fodder in his deceitful Playschool morality play. Go to hell, Mikey.


TOPICS: Constitution/Conservatism; Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Editorial; Government; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: banglist; bowling4columbine; columbine; doofusinaballcap; gungrabbers; guns; liberalelite; mediabias; michaelbore; michaelmoore; michaelmoron; mikeymoron; moore; moorefoodplease; moronalert; propaganda; stupidwhiteman; workoffiction
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1 posted on 12/29/2002 5:19:30 PM PST by beckett
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To: beckett
Go to hell, Mikey

Bump!

2 posted on 12/29/2002 5:24:11 PM PST by hole_n_one
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To: beckett
Who is Mikey Moore, and why does he look like a cross of my late grandmother, the pillsbury dough-boy and Jabba-the-Hut with a stupid baseball hat on?

FMCDH

3 posted on 12/29/2002 5:49:23 PM PST by nothingnew
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To: beckett
Moore theorises that the Columbine killers were inclined towards murder because their town is home to a Lockheed-Martin weapon-making facility. The plant in question actually builds devices that launch TV satellites.

Missle. Launch vehicle. What's the difference :)?

4 posted on 12/29/2002 6:08:18 PM PST by cruiserman
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To: cruiserman
"devices that launch TV satellites"

In the old days, they called those very same, identical "devices" Titan and Atlas missiles. I don't know if they've changed the name, now that they're attaching TV satellites to them, but if you did a nose count of all the Titan and Atlas-derived "devices" that are still in existence, today, most of them still have a nuke attached, inside the tapered part on top.

I haven't seen the movie and have no plans to, but this guy is spinning the same kind of "kiddie fable" he accuses Moore of... As if the difference in American and Canadian body counts is rendered moot by one nutjob in Montreal. Give me a friggin' break.

I'm not particularly pro- or anti- gun or NRA, but I have strong doubts about any real progress being made in reducing violent crime, as long as the focus of public debate is centered on the 2nd Amendment issues, and not on the actual people pulling all those actual triggers.

5 posted on 12/29/2002 7:16:43 PM PST by MoJoWork_n
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To: MoJoWork_n
... and not on the actual people pulling all those actual triggers.

At one time, since the dems wanted more gun control and the government was ignoring drug dealers and other riff raff that were openly using guns, the NRA thought it would be wise to demand the government stop passing gun control and start enforcing the laws on the books. For a single mili-second, it was a brilliant PR move. That is until the government continued to ignore street gangs and started to jail anyone with a restraining order and a gun. Now, anyone who gets a divorce, loses their gun collection. It was the opening the anti-gun crowd needed. They get to jail people who never broke a law before and gunowners who would never join the NRA anyway have an excuse not to.

6 posted on 12/29/2002 7:38:03 PM PST by Shooter 2.5
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To: beckett
Good to see some writer take issue with the leftist mindthink that says "everyone must see this movie".

There are some critics who claim that this film should get "Best Picture" at the Oscars. While I hardly agree with the sentiment, I must say that it is more worthy of "Best Picture" than "Best Documentary" as it is a work of fiction.

7 posted on 12/29/2002 8:28:47 PM PST by weegee
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To: MoJoWork_n
No, Moore's whole point is that the factory was producing weapons, which led the children to think violent thoughts. I saw Bowling for Columbine, and what Tim Blair is saying is right.
8 posted on 12/29/2002 8:31:45 PM PST by xm177e2
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To: MoJoWork_n
but if you did a nose count of all the Titan and Atlas-derived "devices" that are still in existence, today,

You would find that none of them are in service as nuclear weapons delivery devices. The Atlas and Titan are both liquid fueled rockets; USAF,for very good reasons, withdrew all liquid fueled rockets from service years ago. Atlas was withdrawn from ICBM service in 1965. The Titan ICBM force was deactivated in 1987.

You're welcome.

9 posted on 12/29/2002 8:45:20 PM PST by ArrogantBustard
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To: MoJoWork_n
but if you did a nose count of all the Titan and Atlas-derived "devices" that are still in existence, today, most of them still have a nuke attached, inside the tapered part on top.

I very much doubt that. Atlas and Titan are very old technology, and I believe (though am not absolutely certain) that those missles were phased out of the arsenal long ago. Being fueled by liquid propellants (usually involving liquid oxygen), they were much harder to keep on standby than solid fueled launch vehicles.

10 posted on 12/29/2002 8:47:31 PM PST by GSHastings
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To: GSHastings
Heh Heh. Sick minds think alike. You're right. Almost. If I'm remembering right, the early Atlas missiles used LOX/Kerosene, which is not storable. They were stored horizontally and were to be erected and fueled immediately prior to launch. The final version of Atlas ("F", I think), as well as all of the Titan models used some variation on Nitrogen Tetroxide/Hydrazine, which is storable. It's also really nasty; corrosive and poisonous. These missiles were stored vertically in hardened silos. The current Titan launch vehicles use Nitrogen Tetroxide/Hydraxine. I'm not sure about the Atlas. Except that the Atlas III uses Russian engines.

All current US ballistic missiles (both ICBM and SLBM) are, of course, solid fueled.

11 posted on 12/29/2002 8:57:45 PM PST by ArrogantBustard
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To: hole_n_one; glock rocks
Go to hell, Mikey

Bump!

big Bump and PING!

12 posted on 12/29/2002 9:02:26 PM PST by Madcelt
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To: *bang_list
What, nobody's bang_listed this gem yet?
13 posted on 12/29/2002 9:03:33 PM PST by Skibane
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To: beckett
>>Moore theorises that the Columbine killers were inclined towards murder because their town is home to a Lockheed-Martin weapon-making facility.<<


OH NO ! I work in a weapon-making facility !! I've work there for over 20 years !! I need to calm down. I might be inclined to _________________ !!
14 posted on 12/29/2002 9:10:49 PM PST by Missouri
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To: beckett
Is it me, or does Moore exemplify the Ugly American he so loves to go after? Fat, rich, crude...etc.
15 posted on 12/29/2002 9:13:11 PM PST by Hildy
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To: beckett
I actually thought Bowling for Columbine (which I did not see) makes a very good point (even if Moore has to stretch the truth to make it). As Mike tells it, these kids preferred to bowl over being just passable members of society! How far have we slipped when bowling is the highlight of a kids life? Especially in a world of Nintendo, DVDs, Napster, the internet, virtually free sex, etc. when every whim can be met easily. All these kids wanted was some attention and a little order in their sad lives. Yea, it was gun. Riiiight.

The libs have some explaining to do regarding how bad they have fouled up our schools.
16 posted on 12/29/2002 9:20:10 PM PST by Joe_October
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To: Hildy
Fat, rich, crude

He's rich? :)

17 posted on 12/29/2002 9:29:03 PM PST by MitchellC
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To: Hildy
Is it me, or does Moore exemplify the Ugly American he so loves to go after? Fat, rich, crude...etc.

It's why the global market loves him so (France, Australia, England, Canada, etc...).

It puts a familiar face on the stereotype and he uses his boorishness to confront American industry and conservative politics.

18 posted on 12/29/2002 9:34:00 PM PST by weegee
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To: Hildy
Michael Moore, Stupid White Man.
19 posted on 12/29/2002 9:38:51 PM PST by Charles Henrickson
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To: Hildy
Is it me or if Michael Moore saw a penis he'd jump?
20 posted on 12/29/2002 11:01:55 PM PST by Atchafalaya
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