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Are you a beardist? (BE SENSITIVE ALERT)
BBC News ^ | November 18, 2002 | BBC News

Posted on 11/18/2002 8:26:04 AM PST by MadIvan



Did you go to see the new Harry Potter film over the weekend? You could have been unwittingly supporting beardism, say facial hair campaigners.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets may seem like a spot of harmless family fun, but the film could set back the cause of beard wearers at a vital time of year for the long-suffering hirsute man.

The Beard Liberation Front (BLF) objects to the "obviously false" facial hair sported by Robbie Coltrane and the late Richard Harris in the fantasy movie.

Such "end of a broom" fakes give beardists ample ammunition to taunt bearded men, who are particularly targeted for abuse in the run-up to Christmas.



History of beards:

  • Beards, fake and real, were fashionable in ancient Egypt, Greece and Rome
  • 4th Century BC: Alexander the Great ordered his soldiers to shave to avoid having their beards seized during combat
  • 1587: Sir Francis Drake boasted to Elizabeth I that his raid on Cadiz harbour "singed the King of Spain's beard"
  • 1895: William Gillette's invention of safety razor put beards in greater peril
  • 1960s: CIA said to have considered using depilatory on Castro to rob "El Barbudo" of his famous beard
"The Santa season is the worst time of the year for beard wearers," says Keith Flett, driving force of the BLF. "The taunts from children and comments we get from White Van Man get worse."

While the BLF let the first Harry Potter film open without protest, the continued lack of real beards in the second instalment has prompted it to call a boycott. Well, almost.

"Some BLF supporters said they would be given hell by their children if they weren't taken to see Harry Potter," says Mr Flett, who since his teens has worn a "Karl Marx" beard (once cruelly called a "garden gnome affair" by the Evening Standard).

"Now we're just asking our few hundred supporters to hiss and boo when the fake beards come on the screen."

Though the BLF admits its rather shambolic boycott is "light-hearted", there is a serious side, says Mr Flett.

It is argued that beard wearers not only face mockery in the streets, but more entrenched discrimination - so-called "beardism".

Labour Party strategists advised Frank Dobson to shave off his beard if he wanted to win the 2000 London mayoral election. He told them to "get stuffed", and lost.

>B>Get ahead, lose the beard

Coincidence? A survey in the image-conscious United States suggested bearded politicians polled 5% fewer votes than clean-shaven opponents.

A beard can also be a bar to holding even humble posts, like manning the supermarket deli counter. In 2001, an employment tribunal upheld Waitrose's right not to employ bearded men on food counters because facial hair posed a "significant" health risk to customers.

Beardism is also permissible in TV adverts, said the Independent Television Commission when it dismissed 25 complaints about a commercial suggesting the perfect world would be free of facial hair.

"The content of the advertisement was too far-fetched to be taken seriously and unlikely to cause deep or widespread offence," the ITC ruled.

However the Home Office has reportedly woken up to beardism, asking its managers to consider prejudice against facial hair as a form of discrimination.

Beards have ritual significance in several religions, a symbolic importance which has come into sharper focus in the wake of 11 September.

Following a spate of racist attacks, some American Sikhs reportedly shaved to avoid being mistaken for Muslims, who bore the brunt of public anger about the al-Qaeda terror attacks.

Free to shave

The Taleban's much-vaunted enthusiasm for facial hair meant that when the regime fell, Afghan men celebrated their freedom to shave again.

Taleban and al-Qaeda suspects taken by the Americans to Camp X-Ray also lost their beards involuntarily - something criticised by some observers of the detention camp.

Beard facts

  • Men have about 15,000 facial hairs
  • Beards grow about five inches a year
Even in more normal prisons, inmates are fighting for their beard rights. In California, Orthodox Jews and Muslims are opposing a ban on facial hair - imposed after a prisoner fooled guards and escaped San Diego County jail by removing his customary beard.

The BLF says its campaign doesn't stop at the chin. It is defending the rights of all people not to be judged on their appearance or forced to dress and groom in a way dictate by others.

So the BLF defends anyone's decision to hid their face under whiskers? "Well, it might help our cause if Richard Branson shaved his beard off," says Mr Flett.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Foreign Affairs; Front Page News; Miscellaneous; United Kingdom
KEYWORDS: beardism; beards; clam; facialhair
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To: wimpycat
It could be worse. Imagine going up to the sandwich counter and finding this fellow:

Regards, Ivan

21 posted on 11/18/2002 8:47:16 AM PST by MadIvan
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To: MadIvan
The Narcissists had trouble holding a convention. None of them could make it past the mirrors in the lobby.
22 posted on 11/18/2002 8:47:22 AM PST by Britton J Wingfield
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To: MadIvan
My wife says, "Kissing a man without a beard is like eating an egg without salt."
23 posted on 11/18/2002 8:48:36 AM PST by Bloody Sam Roberts
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To: Britton J Wingfield
The Narcissists had trouble holding a convention. None of them could make it past the mirrors in the lobby.

Nah, none of them actually made it to the hall, they were too busy examining themselves in the car mirror. ;)

Regards, Ivan

24 posted on 11/18/2002 8:48:40 AM PST by MadIvan
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To: MadIvan
Beards are too scratchy! I remember growing up and my dad would have a beard...and my face would get so red just kissing him on the cheek. He had to shave it off, it really hurt.

I'm still that sensitive, when hubby has stubble OUCH!
25 posted on 11/18/2002 8:59:32 AM PST by I_Love_My_Husband
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To: HELLRAISER II
I have a beard & it's alway's trimmed & neat, currently it's just a Goatee.

Is it a goatee really? Or is it a Balbo?(Lower left corner)

The true goatee is on the second page of the link.

Many people make the mistake of lumping many different beard types into the catchall category of "Goatee".

26 posted on 11/18/2002 9:01:04 AM PST by Bloody Sam Roberts
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To: Bloody Sam Roberts
Ya got me, it's a balbo.
27 posted on 11/18/2002 9:04:32 AM PST by HELLRAISER II
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To: MadIvan
The worst fake beards ever designed can be found in the movie "Gettysburg" which TBS aired a few years ago.
28 posted on 11/18/2002 9:19:33 AM PST by aardvark1
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To: MadIvan
It could be much worse. Imagine waking up after a night on the town and finding her sleeping next to you in bed!
29 posted on 11/18/2002 9:20:23 AM PST by Fudd
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To: Howlin; Ed_NYC; MonroeDNA; widgysoft; Springman; FreedomPoster; Timesink; AntiGuv; ...
I wear a goatee ping!
"Hold muh beer 'n watch this!" PING....

If you want on or off this list, please let me know!

30 posted on 11/18/2002 9:21:01 AM PST by mhking
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To: wimpycat
I hope you don't mind, but I don't like facial hair on a man. My husband has a moustache and I hate it (married 29 years, 5 months so far). He just ignores me when I ask him to shave it. I have never seen him without it. Been together since we first started dating Jan. 29, 1971. Back then long hair, and facial hair were popular, in the 1960s and early 1970s. But I am sure there are plenty of things about my appearance that you guys wouldn't like... I am plump and 51. I am Not a pretty sight! I just don't like facial hair anymore. I used to. Maybe I will learn to like it again if most men grow beards. I think ZZ Top have taken it TOO FAR! They look horrible!!!! YUCK! My husband teases me that I have a beard, too. (Blonde gal, NO beard or facial hair) He teases me that he is going to shave off HALF of his moustache. He is mean. Mostly we don't talk about it. I am sure he would LOVE to tell me all the things he hates about ME!!! LOL
31 posted on 11/18/2002 9:25:38 AM PST by buffyt
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To: mhking
Hold muh shaving mug...
32 posted on 11/18/2002 9:35:57 AM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
A beard is the quintessence of rugged manliness. How one misses the days of the Old West when every guy around sported a beard to show they didn't give a damn for convention...
33 posted on 11/18/2002 9:39:04 AM PST by goldstategop
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To: HELLRAISER II
...it's a balbo.

I had a feeling. I never knew the real difference until a friend of mine pointed out the difference.

This guy is a real Rennaisance man. I swear he was Porthos in a previous life. Very passionate with a real lusty outlook on life. He even looks the part.

In return, I turned him on to Free Republic. I don't think he's joined up but I know he lurks occasionally.

Cheers.

34 posted on 11/18/2002 9:40:28 AM PST by Bloody Sam Roberts
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To: MadIvan
Smells like good satire to me!
35 posted on 11/18/2002 9:41:06 AM PST by CapedCrusader
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To: buffyt
Surely there must be exceptions to your rule?


36 posted on 11/18/2002 9:52:26 AM PST by wimpycat
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To: MadIvan
Cartman(dressed as Gandalf): What are you guys doing
Kids: We're playing Harry Potter
Cartman: Hahahaha f*gs.
37 posted on 11/18/2002 9:55:57 AM PST by weikel
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To: areafiftyone
My boyfriend has such a baby face that I want him to grow a short beard (not the Moses style) just to see how he would look...... I like when he dosen't shave on the weekends and it's fun because I end up filing my nails on his face...then he just can't stand the itch anymore and shaves on Monday.......
38 posted on 11/18/2002 9:59:01 AM PST by geege
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To: weikel; cardinal4
Moslems wear beards. End of conversation.
39 posted on 11/18/2002 9:59:48 AM PST by Ax
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To: areafiftyone
My boyfriend tries to grow a beard (uses the excuse that in the winter it keeps himm warm but that is a bunch of bull) but I won't let him. I keep tell him he looks like a homeless person or Moses or Bin Laden and that turns him off of it. I get grossed out by it because when they eat it looks sooooo disgusting.

My wife has never seen me without a beard, and won't ket me shave it off, even though I am curious to see what I'd look like. I haven't seen my chin since 1969.

For all of you who are wondering how a wife stops a free red blooded American man from doing what he wants with his own face, the answer is simple. She told me that if I shave my beard she'll stop shaving her legs. Plus she threatens to cut her beautiful long hair. Oh well, at least my chin and I will always have Paris.

40 posted on 11/18/2002 10:00:43 AM PST by Maceman
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