James Lileks' take on the Coleman-Mondale debate (MUST READ!)

The Bleat by James Lileks ^ | 11/5/02 | James Lileks

[Lib Buster]

If anyone’s interested, here’s my take on the debate: a draw. I listened to it, winced, sighed, yawned. Coleman was often too nice - I can’t hear these calls for a “new tone” without thinking A) he’s pitching this at those who believe nothing in particular, and hence distrust anyone who does, or B) he’s going to be devoured like a limping rabbit who wanders into a wolf den. He made a good point about taxes - he said to Mondale that when you begin with the assumption that you’re going to raise taxes, well, that’s what you’ll do. But when you begin with the assumption that you’re going to concede something to get something done, well, concede you will - and often more than you’d like. Concession, horse-trading, back-scratching and all that cloak-room frottage is the way things are done on the Hill. Of course a candidate cannot admit it. You expect them to shout “I promise that if I agree to fund the Robert Byrd Seniors Hydrotherapy Center, I’ll get one of equal size in Duluth, with towel-warming racks as well!” But when I hear calls for a “new tone” I cannot help but imagine the candidate as a fellow walking into a lion-stuffed Coliseum, armed with a feather.

Mondale was a cranky old nasty man who dropped big clanging pieces of boilerplate on the stage, most of which were forged in 1978. How I tire of hearing how everything is going to hell, and how not a jot of progress has been made since Bobby Kennedy slumped over in the Ambassador ballroom. I did learn something about the Constitution, though. As Mondale said:

I'm opposed to late-term abortion, but I also know that the Constitution says that you must protect the life and the health of the mother.

I have the old original version; Mondale is dancing to the remix, so I will grant him that the Constitution does indeed explicitly state this, right between the provisions that grant gun ownership only to redheads and the amendment that permits quartering of troops in private houses if they keep the stereo down after ten. But for me the great fault line ran through this question:

Mr. Mondale, this is for you. This is from Peggy. ``As a businesswoman in southern Minnesota, I'm concerned about technology reaching our businesses and our homes. What is your vision for keeping all of Minnesota on the cutting edge of technology?''

Mondale’s response:

Growing economy, leadership that builds trust. I think right now there should be a reduction in the interest rates.

I’m not kidding. Pitched a question about getting broadband to rural areas, that’s what he says. One word was noticeably absent in Mondale’s reply: INTERNET. Or, for that matter, Fiber, or broadband, or any other aspect of that amusing diversion we call the Web. High-speed internet access in the rural portions of the state is an issue here, because many small towns are served by independent phone companies that can’t afford the upgrades. Or the local phone exchanges have been purchased by out-of-state companies that don’t want to spend the money to run fiber to the barn. It’s a real issue - our paper did a story on it a while back, how the lack of high-speed access crimps the ability of outstate companies to compete.

He continued:

I think that we need to support education that produces economic growth. This is maybe where we disagree. We made a promise that in addition to putting a burden on the schools with new testing that we would provide economic assistance for these schools, elementary and secondary and high school, that would allow them to educate these kids for the future. That has not been done, nor have we brought new help to students.

We need to do that. We have several wonderful educational institutions in our state university system and in the community college systems, and in other systems, that help young people to get ready for this technology and get ready for the future. That's our future, and that's where, I think, our support must be.

Translation: the secretary prints off his Emil for him.

Here’s Coleman:

What we have to do is have to make a firm commitment to make sure that all of Minnesota is wired, and going beyond wired now, now we're talking about wireless. I had an opportunity to visit with the folks over at Minnesota Wireless in Mankato. Wonderful cutting-edge operation, a tentative conference on technology about six months ago, in that same area.

It is our future. We should be wiring the schools and let the businesses draw off a that so they can afford to create the public-private partnership that expands the use of technology. We should be looking at opportunities to expand wireless.

I'm a former mayor. I understand about infrastructure. Part of infrastructure is roads and highways, (inaudible) but another part of infrastructure is the wireless infrastructure. It's linking all of Minnesota through technology. I will be a champion of 21st Century thinking when it comes to making sure that all of Minnesota is wired.

To me, this was the most important moment of the debate - not because it concerned a particular issue, but because it showed who inhabits the current century. Fritz just didn’t get it - which means he’s likely to have a nice steak dinner with The Other White Meat, Fritz Hollings, and sign on to some Disney-paid bill to install copyright protection at the hardware level. Then all the suburban yups who voted for Fritz because, well, you know, Paul and all that, will find himself putting a CD in his computer to rip tunes for personal use - and the disk will be spat out. Or he’ll pop in a DVD he got from a friend, and have to get a new DVD driver with security certificates that establish him as the True Legitimate Owner of the disc - enter your access code now, please, and wait while we access the Warner Brothers / Suncoast database to ensure you are the rightful owner. And the guy will sit there and think: hey, how did this happen?

I’m not saying Coleman is a bulwark against this scenario - only that Mondale obviously hasn’t a clue. When it comes to the computer, to the Internet, he’s truly Grandpa, the guy who thinks he broke the machine when he accidentally minimized a window.

And this is the guy who will vote on digital issues.

After the debate I listened to the usual cud-chomping on the local shows, but the instructive analysis came a few hours later on an ABC radio summation. I was so amused by it that I typed it up on the spot for blogging purposes. Said the reporter:

“Norm Coleman said he wanted to bring a nice, bipartisan tone to the Senate; speaking an hour later at a raucous campaign rally, Walter Mondale said that was interesting, since Coleman ran the trashiest campaign in modern election history against Paul Wellstone, and he urged everyone to vote for in honor of Paul and Sheila Wellstone.”

Not a word of the substance of the debate. Not a word. Just a repeat of this preposterous assertion that Coleman has run a vicious negative campaign - the worst in human memory! It’s interesting to see Mondale go smash-mouth at his age, at this point in his career. Before he entered the race he was regarded by most Minnesotans as That Old Guy Who Lost That Thing. He had receded into the background, earned the statesman’s halo, and eventually come to represent the state of Minnesota for better or for ill. He was one of our own, on his way to a statewide eulogy. But it turns out he’s willing to hold out his wrists for the strings and twitch to the DNC’s script - if they say Norm Coleman channels Satan, then that’s what he’ll proclaim. I always had a hometown admiration for him as a fellow who knew when to leave the stage and make his way in the real world. But now he strikes me as a man who lies for the sake of power with vigor and enthusiasm - and it’s power he never sought to wield again.

If all these things matter so much to you, Mr. Mondale, where have you been?

.

[Lib Buster]

Lileks needs a TV gig...

[rudypoot]

First he states that the debate was a draw then he beats the crap out of Mondale citing examples from the debate. Most people think Coleman won the debate because he at least sounded relevant to our times, not like the Ford Mondale-T from the previous century.

[jigsaw]

Fritz just didn’t get it - which means he’s likely to have a nice steak dinner with The Other White Meat, Fritz Hollings....

ROTFLMAO !!!!!!!!

[Rays_Dad]

bump for later when it is not so slow

[joesnuffy]

Did he begin mumbling inchoherrently about Roman Soldiers marching hundreds of miles every day with each man having to carry his own gaspacho?....A leader to inspire confidence....

[MurryMom]

It’s interesting to see Mondale go smash-mouth at his age, at this point in his career. Before he entered the race he was regarded by most Minnesotans as That Old Guy Who Lost That Thing. He had receded into the background, earned the statesman’s halo, and eventually come to represent the state of Minnesota for better or for ill. He was one of our own, on his way to a statewide eulogy. But it turns out he’s willing to hold out his wrists for the strings and twitch to the DNC’s script - if they say Norm Coleman channels Satan, then that’s what he’ll proclaim.

When the same strategy worked for Dumbya against Gore, where the hell were all the Repuke journalists who now want to promote content over smash-mouth tactics? As a result of their failure to alert the sheeple we are stuck with Dumbya for 2 more, very long years. Mondale's revenge is that the Repuke hypocrites will need to tolerate 6-12 more years of him.

[GunLvr]

Lileks is as smart and funny as Marc Steyn.

GunLvr

[contessa machiaveli]

coleman mentioned he lost 2 very young children, were they stillborn or did they succumb to an illness.

[Abigail Adams]

"Coleman was often too nice..."

Given the "tone" of MN these days, feeling shocked and grieved (yes, even pubbies) at the sudden death of Wellstone, I think if Norm had been more hard-hitting, it would have been viewed unfavorably. And he would have been viewed as mean-spirited if he was harder on Mondale, since Mondale is an old guy. Coleman played it just right for this audience at this time. Go Norm!

[MadIvan]

You are a pathetic excuse for a human being. Before I truly rip into you, I think my colleagues should understand what a depraved individual you are. You, after all, accuse President Bush of evil when you will scream your lungs out in defence of the following:

The Partial Birth Abortion Procedure

	Guided by ultrasound, the abortionist grabs the baby's leg with forceps.
	The baby's leg is pulled out into the birth canal.
	The abortionist delivers the baby's entire body, except for the head.
	The abortionist jams scissors into the baby's skull. The scissors are then opened to enlarge the hole...
	The scissors are removed and a suction catheter is inserted. The child's brains are sucked out, causing the skull to collapse. The dead baby is then removed.

Now:

You preparing your children, "Mom", to similarly savagely scrape out the products of the unbridled lust you want taught in public schools, you filthy pig? You happy to drive them down to Planned Parenthood, if they so choose, so they can get their babies brains sucked out like this? After all, if Bill Clinton is your hero, you probably won't be sorry if your daughters, assuming you have one, get knocked up by someone who is so long on depravity, short on character and substance.

Meanwhile, you want the Democrats to get away with breaking the law, as they did with Lautenberg being on the ballot, with turning a memorial into a pep rally, with eating out out the substance of those who work to give money to the shiftless, to prevent the Homeland Security department being formed, and to keep Saddam Hussein alive. And you have the bloody nerve to come onto a conservative website and complain about President Bush. Well don't complain about being smashed in the mouth for putting forth such stupidity. Like your hero would tell you if he met you in a Motel 6, I suggest you put some ice on it.

Ivan

[terilyn]

"Coleman's wife, Laurie, is originally from Minnesota. "I'm a Jewish kid from Brooklyn married to a nice Catholic girl from Minneapolis," he explains. The Colemans have been married for 16 years. "We have four kids--two passed away at a very young age, and two are still with us," he notes. The Colemans first son, Adam, was born in 1983 and lived for about six weeks. Their second son, Jacob, is 11, and their daughter, Sarah, is 7. A little girl, Grace, was born in 1992 and lived for about three months."

From other articles I've seen, it's a genetic disease that both of the infants inherited.

[contessa machiaveli]

that's so tragic, it would have been so easy for him to make political hay in the debate. he answered with dignity and grace. but i shouldn't be surprised, after all he's a republican. thanks for the info.

[KateUTWS]

Well said Ivan!

[highpockets]

BTTT

[BurFred]

Lileks also wrote one of the funniest books I have ever read, The Gallery of Regrettable food. Some of it is on his web site but you have to get the book for the full effect.

[terilyn]

You're very welcome. It is sad, and he is a class act.

[Lib Buster]

Yes, have a copy of "The Gallery of Regrettable Food" and eagerly await the release of his next book, "Interior Desecrators". His website is my first Internet stop each morning. It's a great way to start the day!

[barryselby]

I couldn't have said it better!!!!
how can anyone have that much bitterness for someone who is such a caring man as GWB and have such an overriding lust for WJC

[cibco]

It's called being "Mentally Challenged". ie lunatic...;0)

[MadIvan]

What I love is how the leftists pretend they are "for the children", but when it comes down to the lives of children, they are in favour of infanticide. The hypocrisy is unbelievable and they constantly get away with it.

Mondale is a good example of this - he tries to come across as being "grandfatherly", but he has consistently argued and fought for the procedure I've just described.

Minnesotans, and perhaps this is partially Garrison Keillor's fault, have a public image both in America and abroad, that suggests "niceness" is a quality of their state. I will question that severely if all they can do is vote for standard issue liberals who demand the right to murder babies in this manner.

Regards, Ivan