Posted on 09/26/2002 1:43:29 PM PDT by dead
CONFIDENTIAL MEMO
DATE. September 26, 2002
TO: Senator Tom Dachshund
FROM Barbra Streisand/Margery Tabankin
RE. Your fantabulous speech!
As all the world is aware, Brbara Streisand is preparing for her ninth-annual farewell tour, as well as finishing her first-ever, all-by-herself reading of “Green Eggs and Ham,” so she ordered me to “shut the hell up and write down what I want you tell that little guy on the television, you filthy worthless peasant!”
Naturally, Brabra's not surprised to see the Busch administration say mean things about peoples of color and those who are less heterosexual than the magority. They’ve always cared more about their own spatial interests than the shape of the world around them. Of course, the Republicans will say anything they need to in order to kill children with arsenio-poisoned water. Bbabra feels that the Democratic Leadership must grab the skinned cat by the horns and fight dirty with fier.
Senator Dachshund, yours was the first step in this new and nonunimportant direction. Braveo, I say to you! The mear fact that the President questions your patrionism, while he lets logging interests force us into a war for oil trees is blantenly despestible! Many of these loggers, who are all Republican bigwigs, clearly have much to gain if we go to war with Iran. Brrabra humbly urges you and your fellow (and lady) congresspersons to get off your asses and pubicly convoy this massage to the masses of Americains who are less smarty than Barbra and have yet to fornicate this opinion on there own.
While there are nonunimportant problems with Iran and Sadom Hussheim, Barbbra feels that maybe a little love in his direction would rub away the wounds that trouble him so and make him sometimes lash out. We can’t let his, certainly nonundeserved, disgust with this president and his father, reconvene the thoughts of Americans away from the social problems (when exactly was the last party in Washington?!?) this country faces. Besides, as the world continues to sink into it’s own oceans, the Al Qyoto network is completely nonundismantled! After all, Sadom Hussheim certainly did not bomb the World Financial Center.
Feel free to call Brarabrara and tell her how write she is at 310-395-3599 if you ever hope to see another big fat check.
1460 ELEVENTEENTH STREET, SUITE 212 · SANTA CLAUSICA, CALIFORNIA 90401
(310) 395~3599 · FAX (310) 395-9676
Outstanding! *wiping tear from corner of eye*
Hints for Writers:
Allways proffreed.
That woould be a good job for the admenunstrayters. They seem to hang on to every word we write!
Right on! As all de wo'ld be aware, Brbara Streisand be preparin' fo' ha' nind-annual farewell tour, as well as finishin' ha' fust-ever, all-by-herself eyeballin' uh “Green Eggs and Ham,” so's she o'dered me t'“shut da damn hell down and scribble waaay down whut ah' wants' ya' tell dat little dude on de television, ya' fildy wo'dless peasant! Right on!”
Naturally, Brabra's not surprised t'see da damn Busch administrashun say mean doodads about sucka'ss uh colo' and dose who is less heterosexual dan de mago'ity. Slap mah fro! Dey’ve always cared mo'e about deir own spatial interests dan de shape uh de wo'ld around dem. WORD! Of course, de Republicans gots'ta say nuthin dey need t'in o'da' towaste children wid arsenio-poisoned booze. Bbabra feels dat da damn Democratic Leadership gots'ta grab de skinned cat by de ho'ns and fight dirty wid fier. Ah be baaad...
Senato' Dachshund, yo's wuz de fust step in dis new and nonunimpo'tant direcshun. Braveo, ah' say t'ya'! Right on! De mear fact dat da damn Super-dude quesshuns yo' patrionism, while he lets loggin' interests fo'ce us into some war fo' oil trees be blantenly despestible! Right on! Many uh dese loggers, who is all Republican bigwigs, clearly gots much t'gain if we go t'war wid Iran. 'S coo', bro. Brrabra humbly urges ya' and yo' dude (and lady) congresssucka's t'get off yo' asses and pubicly convoy dis massage t'de masses uh Americains who is less smarty dan Barbra and gots yet t'fo'nicate dis opinion on dere own. 'S coo', bro.
While dere is nonunimpo'tant problems wid Iran and Sadom Hussheim, Barbbra feels dat maybe some little love in his direcshun would rub away de wounds dat trouble him so's and make him sometimes lash out. Man! We kin’t let his, certainly nonundeserved, disgust wid dis super-dude and his Big Daddy, reconvene da damn doughts uh Americans away fum de social problems (when 'esactly wuz de last party in Wuzhin'ton?! Right on!?) dis country faces. Besides, as de wo'ld continues t'sink into it’s own oceans, de Al Qyoto netwo'k be completely nonundismantled! Right on! Afta' all, Sadom Hussheim certainly dun did not bomb de Wo'ld Financial Center. Ah be baaad...
Feel free t'call Brarabrara and tell ha' how scribble she be at 310-395-3599 if ya' eva' hope t'see anoda' big fat check. Ya' know?
1460 ELEVENTEENTH STREET, SUITE 212 · SANTA CLAUSICA, CALIFORNIA 90401 (310) 395~3599 · FAX (310) 395-9676 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That "Dead!" He TOUCHED ME with his FEELINGS here.
Bookmarked and Bumped
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.