Never been to the southern rural part of these states, have ya? Marion, Ill. is full of retirees from the nearby states and very nice to stay in. So is Carbondale-- except the students at Southern Illinois University are nuts. Southern Illinois has very little in common with northern Illinois-- you'll feel like you're in Tennessee. Check out Crab Orchard Lake and Cave-in-Rock state park. Shawee National Forrest is A+ for hunting and fishing. Terre Harte and Evansville, IN are beautiful, warm, folksy, CONSERVATIVE towns in midwestern heartland. Cincinnati is way too dirty and liberal, but the suburbs on the Kentucky side are really nice. Ames, Iowa is the best little place if you're looking for charm in that state, and Riverside, Iowa is the "Future Birthplace of Captain Kirk".
Would that be Admiral James Tiberius Kirk?