Vanity: Worst Baby Names

11/26/01

[Phantom Lord]

Alright, this is a total vanity. I didn't post it under "Breaking News" so relax.

My mother and aunts have been pestering my wife and I about when we are going to have children. Lately, we have taken to coming up with the worst possible names for babies and telling them we are considering names first. Well, they get real upset with some of them and even get angry with us for even considering them.

My mother in law is coming down for Christmas and it is inevitable that when she, my mother, and my aunts get together they will gang up on us about having kids. So, what I need from my fellow FReepers is a good list of really bad baby names to suggest to them as names we are considering. You help and creativity is greatly appreciated.

Oh, the last name is Terwilliger if that helps at all.

[hobbes1]

Wolfgang is a GREAT name for a little boy....and Wolf for a Big boy......

Couldn't wait to name my first that...

[Physicist]

Jacob is a good name.

But bad names, hmm...

"Clinton" is the worst I can think of, but I think they'd be onto you.

Beaureguard. Rastus. Rollo. Mehitabel. Abercrombie. Shmuel. Shlomo. Aloysius. Raffles. Haaken. Griselda. Rabindranath. Poindexter. Liberace. Ebeneezer. Obadiah.

Or the one I proposed for my son Jake: Asabee (pronounced ASS-uh-bay). It's a Pennsylvania Dutch name.

[Viet Vet in Augusta GA]

No-brainer: Osama.

[null and void]

By far, the worst name for a male child: "Bruthie"

[alisasny]

Any of the Jackson Family names should get them to quiet down...

TITO

[ar10]

Latrina for a girl and Nosmo'king for a boy.

[Happygal]

Osama and Hillary? Nice name for twins maybe? *ROFL*

[A Navy Vet]

Oglethorpe Laden III

[Non-Sequitur]

I had a great-aunt named Clydie Belle. Can't get much worse than that. And my maternal grandfathers first name was Gratz.

[Creightongrad]

Colton.

[Incorrigible]

Why not name your baby IUMA!

Name Your Baby IUMA!
Winners!

[oyez]

How's Terri William Terwilliger or Terry Will Terwilliger. That should drive people nuts.

[Betty Jane]

Girls names are easy. Just think of all those great aunts you have. How about Geraldine Esther, Adelheide, Gertrude, Agnes, Josephine, Agatha, Henrietta.

For boys start with "h", Harold, Howard, Heinrich. Then add some names to get your kid beat up with. Norman, Freddy, Oscar, Oliver.

I wanted to name a son Phineas, but my husband wasn't up for it. There's always Erasmus, Obidiah, and Silas.

Good Luck.

[Loopy]

Nothing really. It just doesn't go with Terwilliger, and it brings instantly to mind a stereotypical Irish Drunkard.

[TwoBear]

Well, here's my contribution.

Went to school with a girl named Ignacita,

also lived close to a guy named Peter Holder (Ha Ha)

or any of the following: Beula, Bertha, Winona, Ashley (boy), Osama, Regis

[Lazamataz]

Throatwarbler Mangrove Whistlestop Winklestein.

[patent]

For girls you could go with the ever popular Ashley, Lauren, Madison, Taylor, Destiny or the like. For boys you could try to match those names with Biff, Buff, that type of thing, but nobody gives a boy a name like that. Perhaps Rupert? Logan? Chase?

Your last name makes it harder. We have one that has endless combinations with other words. We terrorized our relatives with the first kid. They don’t ask anymore. ;-)

Perhaps you could go with something from current events? Osama, Mullah, or Omar? Blair? Rummy?

patent  +AMDG

[Dog]

LOL!

How are you..... good I hope!

[Jerry_M]

Jacob means "deceiver"

Ichabod means "the Glory (of God) has departed"

Biblical names, but not the best meanings.