The Female of the Species

http://www.potw.org/archive/potw96.html ^ | ? | Rudyard Kipling

[backhoe]

Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936)

The Female of the Species

    WHEN the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride,
    He shouts to scare the monster, who will often turn aside.
    But the she-bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail.
    For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

    When Nag the basking cobra hears the careless foot of man,
    He will sometimes wriggle sideways and avoid it if he can.
    But his mate makes no such motion where she camps beside the trail.
    For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

    When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws,
    They prayed to be delivered from the vengeance of the squaws.
    'Twas the women, not the warriors, turned those stark enthusiasts pale.
    For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

    Man's timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say,
    For the Woman that God gave him isn't his to give away;
    But when hunter meets with husbands, each confirms the other's tale—
    The female of the species is more deadly than the male.

    Man, a bear in most relations—worm and savage otherwise,—
    Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise.
    Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact
    To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act.

    Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low,
    To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe.
    Mirth obscene diverts his anger—Doubt and Pity oft perplex
    Him in dealing with an issue—to the scandal of The Sex!

    But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame
    Proves her launched for one sole issue, armed and engined for the same;
    And to serve that single issue, lest the generations fail,
    The female of the species must be deadlier than the male.

    She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast
    May not deal in doubt or pity—must not swerve for fact or jest.
    These be purely male diversions—not in these her honour dwells—
    She the Other Law we live by, is that Law and nothing else.

    She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great
    As the Mother of the Infant and the Mistress of the Mate.
    And when Babe and Man are lacking and she strides unclaimed to claim
    Her right as femme (and baron), her equipment is the same.

    She is wedded to convictions—in default of grosser ties;
    Her contentions are her children, Heaven help him who denies!—
    He will meet no suave discussion, but the instant, white-hot, wild,
    Wakened female of the species warring as for spouse and child.

    Unprovoked and awful charges—even so the she-bear fights,
    Speech that drips, corrodes, and poisons—even so the cobra bites,
    Scientific vivisection of one nerve till it is raw
    And the victim writhes in anguish—like the Jesuit with the squaw!

    So it comes that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer
    With his fellow-braves in council, dare not leave a place for her
    Where, at war with Life and Conscience, he uplifts his erring hands
    To some God of Abstract Justice—which no woman understands.

    And Man knows it! Knows, moreover, that the Woman that God gave him
    Must command but may not govern—shall enthral but not enslave him.
    And She knows, because She warns him, and Her instincts never fail,
    That the Female of Her Species is more deadly than the Male.

---

This poem can be found, for example, in:

• Kipling, Rudyard. Rudyard Kipling's Verse: Inclusive Edition, 1885-1918. London: Hodder & Stoughton, 1919.
• Felleman, Hazel, ed. The Best Loved Poems of the American People. Garden City, NY: Garden City Books, 1936.

[be-baw]

Nice post, heavy equipment guy...lots to ponder about here. What I want to know, however, is WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN? Sorry, if I'm off topic...just something I've wondered about for the last two decades or so.

[elbucko]

You would like the writings of Phillip Stanhope, better known as the Earl of Chesterfield, and the letters to his son.

"My Dear Boy; Women, then are only children of a larger growth;......but for solid reasoning, and good sense, I never knew one in my life that had it,"....

Letter dated 05 Sept. 1748.

[monkey]

Where, at war with Life and Conscience, he uplifts his erring hands
To some God of Abstract Justice—which no woman understands.

This is one of the two greatest weaknesses of the democratic experiment.

[Sabertooth]

When paying cash for groceries, standing in the express line,
A man will rarely hesitate to plainly speak his mind,
Except behind the woman with a hundred dollar sale,
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

[elbucko]

Sic 'em, Sabertooth....Uh, I gota' go now, wifes calling.

[IronJack]

If you want poetry in a similar vein, check out Robert Service. Incredible.

[Lizavetta]

WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN?

They've given more rides than Greyhound....they're bound to have picked up a few tricks along the way.

[Sabertooth]

Women have the gifts of looking sweet and smelling nice,
But try and leave the lid up and they'll quickly turn to ice.
Although we're made of snakes and snails and little puppy tails,
It's the female of the species that's more deadly than the male.

[vikingchick]

When Sabertooth is driving, his pickup to the mall--
He zooms up right behind you, and leaves no room at all.
What's the rush?, you wonder, his aggressions oh so clear,
Is he pining for his sports programs and depleted case of beer?

[JD86]

WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN?

okay, I don't know if this was a serious question...so I'll provide two answers, take your choice....
not serious - liberal women think legal bordellos are a civil right...so that may carry over to their attitudes....
serious - either you have your labels reversed...or you have been meeting the wrong "conservative" women....
but...don't believe me, ask the conservative men here...they all seem pretty satisfied with their choices.

[Sabertooth]

WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN?

That's what all the lesbians say.

[pcl]

WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN?

Do you really need to ask?

[fourdeuce82d]

"WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN"

in my experience the opposite is true. Conservative gals may be a little shy about this and that and the other thing- but in my experience they are quite enthusiastic once they feel you will not think ill of them, and are quite happy to dress up as a pirate, and chase one around the room on a pogo stick whilst brandishing a spatula.

"liberal" women, in my experience, are anything but in private. Seems to me they take everything seriously, and are more repressed than an Amish spinster.

I dunno- intimate relations should be about caring/loving/romance, etc.- but sometimes they should also be about fun, being silly, or being a leeeetle bit naughty- I don't think progressive women are comfortable with anything but the first part....OWWWW- baby- you have to defrost the duck first OWW OWW....

[proud American in Canada]

Re #10: Wow! I love your posts, but you've outdone yourself here!!!! :-)

[proud American in Canada]

Re #17: okay, I don't know how to post a link, but please do a search for "the driving habits of the North American Soccer Mom." More than enough ammo for you there.... :)

[SusanUSA]

WHY ARE LIBERAL WOMEN MORE SKILLFUL LOVERS THAN CONSERVATIVE WOMEN?

Most likely, because they believe in helping the unskilled to the same bounty as the skilled. OTOH, Conservative women, rather than unfairly rewarding the unskilled, realize the prize goes to the guy who can rightfully claim it.

Just a thought.

[proud American in Canada]

When paying cash for groceries, standing in the express line,
A man will rarely hesitate to plainly speak his mind,
Except behind the woman with a hundred dollar sale,
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

My God, that reminds me of my last trip to Walmart!