[Brother of] IowaHawk: Why Do They Hate Us, Dude?

CNSNews.com ^ | October 26, 2001 | Keanu Burge

[beekeeper]

Totally, ya know, yeah, well, ya know...

[daitex]

You mean, don't tell me, the radical trans-national Islamic Terrorists hate us for all these reasons?

C'mon dude! If we didn't buy their damned oil, they would be sitting in tents roast camels or some such.

If we weren't involved they wouldn't even have camels left to munch on.

if we didn't gift them billions, they long ago would have ceased to be nations having returned to their transitory life of roaming the desert(those few that are left).

This boils down to the hatred for our support of Israel and our daring set foot on their holy soil. Sure it may be that they are envious. Sure it may be that they really believe the Mullah exists and they will win. Nope. I figured them out. They are here on our soil. It is time to root them out and hang the sorry counterfeit SOBs. And then get on with the rest of the world. Why are these people still here?

Besides, who cares if they hate us or not?

We now have the message they wished to send.

Now it is our turn to send a message by God and so Help me....Send them to their prophet and soon, "expletive deleted" 'em, feed 'em fish heads, the sorry 'B-st-ds', they can all kiss my 'expletive deleted' or kiss their own goodbye.

If they are not afraid to die for their country or their religion, we shouldn't be afraid to kill them.

dai

[benjaminthomas]

nothing offends the Afghanistanic people like religious xenophobia . . .

LOL. Same with the Iraqians, the Syriatites and the Iranish!

[4CJ]

Heck, we should even graciously speed them on their way.

Because we tolerated X42 for 8 years with all his excesses and abuses, and yet Dims refused to impeach him.
Because we send money to every starving country, and they don't even feed themselves.
Because we have elections, and even when bitterly contested, the change is non-violent.
Because we have the inane ramblings of those idiots from Hollywood, the "It's All about me" folks, and still allow them to think they're important.
Because we even allow dissent, and the dissenters aren't killed immediately.
That we have freedoms that they can only dream about.
That as much as they hate us, and despise us, it's the country they all want to immigrate to.

[SunnyUsa]

Wow, that was awesome dude!!!

hey whadU say to get your first comment busted man?

How Rude!!!! ;)

this is hilarious , BTW....

"So you still think Americans are tolerant? Tell that to my Egyptian-Syrian neighbor Abdullah. Since the tragedy on September 11, he has suffered dozens of hurtful stares and insensitive comments. He has been so upset over this he has almost abandoned his dream of owning his own crop-dusting business.

True story, I bet!!!

[<1/1,000,000th%]

Dude! Like...ya know...good post man!! But...see...like...ya know...I mean...how does post #1 get removed?

[IowaHawk]

Beats the hell outta me; the first response was blank. It may have been an angry blank, tho.

[mbb bill]

They are screaming for leaders!!!!

[IowaHawk]

Hey Sunny - here's the previous piece by Keanu:

I Am A Patriot Too, Dude

[SunnyUsa]

your brother...."a fourth year sophomore journalism major at Enormous State University and columnist for the ESU Daily State Appropriation

you must want to strangle him, in a big brother loving way of course!

He's ALMOST as funny as you! :)

and about that first comment, it may not be that you said NOTHING, it's the Way you said NOTHING!
gotta watch that!

[Alex Murphy]

They hate us because of our arrogance. All around the world, "Ugly Americans" are despised for their arrogant condescension, always acting like they are somehow "better" than other cultures. We in the peace community are always trying to patiently explain this to other Americans, but apparently they are too stupid to understand. Oh man, thank you SO MUCH for another gut-busting yukfest (for those of you who are now reaching for your air-sickness bags in the back pocket of your La-Z-Boys, I said GUT-busting YUKfest, not GOAT-BURSTING YAKFEST, but enough about zoology).

"I Am A Patriot Too, Dude" holds a permanent place of honor in my Netscape bookmarks file under folder "personal", subfolder "distractions, subfolder "humor", proudly holding the number three spot. I believe it's between www.CNN.com and http://science.northern.edu/exponent/archive/2001/0131/editorial/0131-matson.htm but I haven't surfed to it in several weeks so I may be wrong about that. It might have been www.NPR.com for all I know at #2.

So when's this guy coming out with a book? I've got the photocopier all fired up, just waiting and burning the office's electricity until he finally does!

[lepton]

I don't believe I've ever seen a first-post deletion before that left the article.

Moderator: Why was it deleted?

[Congressman Billybob]

Dear Phil,

ANYTIME you see the byline IowaHawk or Burge, stop whatever else you are doing and read with care. Iowa says he doesn't do well on air, otherwise we should have him on.

I am fully satisfied that Iowa is an intellectual twin to Gary Larsen. It takes a special mind to think this stuff up.

Congressman Billybob

[COB1]

Even as a satire, I have a hard time keeping the anger from welling up!

[IowaHawk]

Keanu wants to write a book, but I told him he should try reading one first.

[LisaFab]

Anyone who reads the New York Times can tell you that the international community is troubled by America's dangerous isolationism, and also its interventionism.

That line alone is a keeper. Great job.

[IowaHawk]

Hey hey, Congressman! Hope things are peachy in beautiful East Carolina. Best, IH

[NittanyLion]

Anyone who reads the New York Times can tell you that the international community is troubled by America's dangerous isolationism, and also its interventionism....nothing irritates the international community more than our reclusive, meddlesome, negligent hegemony.

Brilliant satire. This is the best one yet!

[SunnyUsa]

"Even as a satire, I have a hard time keeping the anger from welling up"

I know what you mean, because it's so dead-on the way those dopes think! I was getting aggravated too, but the laughs calmed me down!

IowaHawk's brother must post as IowaDove!