Note to pompous people: It is a breach of etiquette to point out another's breach of etiquette.

me ^ | today | me

[Notwithstanding]

Keep this in your rolodex for use when etiquetter-than-thou types make noise: the first rule of etiquette is that you never draw attention to yourself or to the mistakes of others.

I had high-end formal etiquette training as a military cadet, and we were taught that if someone on unfamiliar turf (like a guest) were to commit a faux paus (like spill a drink) the very best thing we could do would be to do the same thing a little later on in order to make that person feel less like a boob.

If anything else , you do not correct others' mistakes. The mistakes of others end up catching up to those who make them - no help is needed.

[Notwithstanding]

I am not advocating etiquette. I am simply informing people about the rules of etiquette so they can tell when someone is a mere pretender.

[dirtboy]

A professor of mine refers to the average uninformed sheeple as "boobus americanus".

Which is pretty arrogant in its own right. Guess what? I really don't care about the proper way to set a table.

[dirtboy]

I am simply informing people about the rules of etiquette so they can tell when someone is a mere pretender.

Remind me to not invite you to my parties. Wouldn't want everyone spilling their drinks all over my carpet.

[Cogadh na Sith]

Um, is this rule still in effect if you are a pompous little wanker 'presently traipsing around Europe'?

Or is it OK in that case?

[CatoRenasci]

Your advice is certainly sound in social situations and in avoiding unnecessary offense or humiliation: one should always strive to make one's guests feel at ease. There is a story told of a member of the upper reaches of the English aristocracy: when a dinner guest ignorantly drank out his finger bowl, the aristocrat immediately did likewise, followed by everyone at table.

In situations where the purpose is the exchange of information, whether as peers or in a student-teacher relationship, the matter of correcting mistakes is perhaps different. Clearly, the teacher, courteously one hopes, must correct the students mistakes in order to enable the student to achieve the mastery the teacher is engaged to impart. In strictly peer-to-peer situations, whether one corrects a mistake of fact must depend on the circumstances, the greater the importance of the exchange of information, the greater the obligation one has to correct mistakes of fact.

One might profitably view the exhanges here on FR as an amalgam of peer-to-peer and teacher-student relationships, given the significant differences in knowledge among members of the group of more ore less common interests. Hence, corrections as to fact, and even argument (in the academic sense) as to interpretation are well within bounds.

As I recall, a becoming modesty as to one's own credentials is also a hallmark of the well-bred gentleman or lady.

[Dog Gone]

Etiquette, schetiquette.

Hey, pal, get it right! It's "Etiquette, schmetiquette."

[Notwithstanding]

see # 21

[Xenalyte]

Too late! Where'd I put the mung rag?

[geaux]

As a guest on some night show said years ago (paraphrased): Etiquette is a system of EXclusion. Class is a system of INclusion. Understanding how to behave according to the rules of class is a much better quality than knowing etiquette.

Classy people don't point out mistakes. But they do make sure the person making mistakes sees the proper example of how to behave.

[SGCOS]

...Hey, pass me a beer..."buuuurp".....

[4CJ]

"I had high-end formal etiquette training ..."

You might have been taught or received instructions in high-end formal etiquette training ... ;o)

[ofMagog]

Welcome to FR.
You will enjoy the cheese.
I hope your sister is protected from meese.

[101viking]

Here! Here!

I sometimes wonder if the posting police here are all retired IRS auditors. The battle cry of the Free Republic: "NO MERCY."

[dirtboy]

Hey, pal, get it right! It's "Etiquette, schmetiquette."

Don't be uncouth.

[Notwithstanding]

In his early career my father was a driver's education teacher. He HATED the common term "driver traning". He would always say: "you train dogs and educate people".

[dirtboy]

What in heavens name would you do if they puked on dog and then fell over dead drunk in the line at the bathroom with their pants down around their ankles?

Actually, that sounds like it could get rather interesting.

[Orual]

I would add that the rule is to be discrete...

Using the greatest of discretion, I will discrEEtly observe that to be discrEEt is an honorable characteristic and one should always be aware of discrEEtness in social exchanges.

[Interesting Times]

I am not advocating etiquette. I am simply informing people about the rules of etiquette so they can tell when someone is a mere pretender.

Sorry, but that doesn't fly.

You can't offer supercilious advice and then pretend to be disinterested.

Well, actually you can, but it makes you look pretty ridiculous.

Mind you, I am not advocating that you avoid looking ridiculous.

I am simply informing you about the facts of the situation so that you may make any adjustments you find appropriate.

[CatoRenasci]

What in heavens name would you do if they puked on dog and then fell over dead drunk in the line at the bathroom with their pants down around their ankles?

Why, have them cleaned up in another bathroom, their clothes laundered, and put them to bed in the guest room until they recovered, feed them and send them home. Never mention the incident to anyone. And never, ever invite them back.