Sorry Marine -- You're Too Old

Smoke Signal (Vanity) Times | 10-3-01 | CHIEF negotiator

[CHIEF negotiator]

The nerve of that Marine Corps recruiter telling me I'll too old to re-up!

I said,

"But I'm a 2nd Force Recon Scout Sniper that can still pic-a-tic off a gnat's ass @ 1K meters, in a snow storm! We lay-in-wait, and over the last 30 years I've had a lot of experience. Snipers only need to be able to "snoop & poop" and carry a 50 caliber. We don't have to do 50 squat thrusts before lights out, or hump 20 miles in full pack before sunrise! Put me up against your best 20 year old. It takes a lot to get a snipers heartrate up, 'cause we've been trained to "relax" if you want "one shot -- one kill", and I invented "relax".

I'll die my hair to cover the gray, get lippo-suction and a face-lift, if you can push this paperwork through, Sergeant."

He didn't go for it. Should I lie about my age?

MARINES

THE PRESIDENT'S OWN

[COB1]

Just in case you find a way, let me know!
My left eye got messed up, but I don't look through a sight with that one anyway.

[A Navy Vet]

I'm impressed. Good luck to you, shipmate. I'll be doing my part in other ways.

[CHIEF negotiator]

LOL!

My wife is wondering what that twinkle in my eyes mean.

SHUFFLE TO THE DOOR!!!

Did your real PLF ever look like it did in "Tower Week"? Mine neither.:-)

[razorback-bert]

Oh yes, the Thunderbirds will be at the Confederate Air Show this week end.

Any body wanting to come at the last minute, I have plenty of floor space, sleeping bags and mattress.

[HEFFERNAN2]

www.opsos.org If you go to this website you can send letters and packages to G.I.'s Please be aware of what you can mail and cannot mail. Semper Fi, Mike

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

"Hey, Tonkin, what's the age cut-off on the Auxilliary?"
Membership is open to all citizens of the United States and its territories who are at least 17 years old.
(no top end age stated)
"I'll bet they have one in Texas, too!"
Yes they do
"Will they take old grunts?"
Yes they will.
We Need You: United State Coast Guard Auxillary

[SauronOfMordor]

Have you tried bypassing the recruiter, finding the number of the CO of the Marine Sniper School, and talking to him? While you might be too old for them to want to send you out to the field, maybe you can take over some instructor's duties so that HE can go?

[clamper1797]

Just submitted my application ... I live on the Sacramento river .... right on the river. And I have a very fast cigarette boat. I've seen the auxillary Coast Guard out here. Never occurred to me to join them till now. They use their own boats.

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

"Tell me where to address your 'I CARE' packages!!"

LOL

You can support the regular military here:
Support Our Soldiers, Send US Mail OR an E-mail to a service person.

Support our Troops NOW!

USO (website) Mission: Delivering America to our Armed Forces

[clamper1797]

And I have a very fast cigarette boat

Now I'm trying to figure out where to mount the twin 50's

[Focault's Pendulum]

Just thought you'd all like to know what we've been planning

Woof Woof!!

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

"and am trying to figure out if there's somewhere an old stockbroker can serve her country more effectively."

We Need You: United State Coast Guard Auxillary
They need men and women, no upper end age limit, and no prior military required. And the do need help in Michigan.

[COB1]

O.K., Tonkin, I signed up.
If they start throwing a lot of that swabbie stuff at me like spinnaker and jib sail, I might have to call on you for help.
All I understand is maiming and killing the enemy.

[68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub]

"I'll be doing my part in other ways."

That's exactly what this country needs!
Each citizen finding out what he or she can do, then actually doing it.

PS I checked ahead for you, no flat tops in the Coast Guard Auxilliary,LOL

[clamper1797]

We could teach you about things like ... Po city

[CHIEF negotiator]

Semper Fi from a Jacksonville/Camp Lejeune hometown girl!

WOW!!! Jacksonville hometown girl. Do they still have bars on one side of the street and bidnesses on the other?

[timydnuc]

COB1

You are a patriot, sir! I got hit in the shins by motar fire. I didn't get hit that bad. I got a Purple Heart, and I don't even claim that, but I claimed no disabliity. I was "doc"...yep, a medic..corpsmen..what ever you want to call it. It happened in such a way that the injury was slight. I dug the schrmnal out with a pair of forcepts. A little bandage and I was still on duty. I had too, I was the only "doc" for my outfit. My job was just as important as the auto/weps, or the radio man, or any rifle man in that company. They would have done the same thing. The undeclared pledge in our company was: If you ain't dead, or missin' somthing, you keep fighting, till you can't do it nomore!

I'll trust your one eye to any two I've ever known.

If they come after us, they have sealed their fate. We don't quit till we win!

[RANGERAIRBORNE]

"Did your real PLF ever look like it did in "Tower Week"? Mine neither.:-)"

Not only did my PLF never look like the ones I had to do to get past Tower Week, but in my later career I was actually brought out to do my patented "Airborne Sack of Potatoes" PLF as a horrible example of "how NOT to land"!

My landing (on a GOOD day) could fairly be described as about the equivalent of a side of beef being thrown off a truck (traveling at a high rate of speed).

And I made it through Jumpmaster School, too. (Not without some minor difficulty, though- I once managed to just plain FORGET to release a PAE bag with well over 100 pounds of ammunition, radios, etc in it, prior to impacting the ground. It would have made a great America's Funniest Home Video!)

It is amazing, in retrospect, that I have only the knee and shoulder injuries I do, and never actually broke my neck parachuting. I was GREAT in the air- it was just that little landing thingy that got to me... :-)

[Billthedrill]

Arrrr-r-r-r-r-r-r, ye sea-goin' bellhop! ;-)

I know the feeling. What really hurts is that I'm looking at 50, in the best shape of my life, and am regarding the current recruits with horror...Jaysus, they're just kids. Were we ever that young?

There are a couple of things we can do: (1) keep the shooting eye sharp (and what the heck, given the nature of this little brouhaha there's even an outside chance we might be able to use it right here) - and (2) for me the big one, it's this: the treatment accorded the Vietnam vets will never, never happen again as long as I draw breath. First sumbitch spits on a vet will have my thumbprints on his trachea, no joke.

Happy birthday in advance from an ex-squid. Nice to see the Navy's little brothers dressed up so fine, so very fine...but you can't take 'em out...