Bank of England must plan for financial crisis sparked by aliens

The Times ^ | 01 16 2026 | Marc Horne

[yesthatjallen]

The Bank of England must plan for a financial crisis being triggered by an official announcement confirming the existence of alien life, one of its former policy experts has claimed.

Helen McCaw served as a senior analyst in financial security at the UK’s central bank, preparing for events that could impact the economy.

She has now written to Andrew Bailey, the Bank’s governor, urging him to organise contingencies for the possibility that the White House may one day confirm we are not alone in the universe.

McCaw, a Cambridge graduate, believes a declaration of that magnitude would send shockwaves through the markets and could trigger bank collapses and civil unrest.

Until recently, suggestions that governments were covering up the existence of alien life were limited to a small coterie of conspiracy theorists and UFO activists.

However, a host of senior American officials, including the secretary of state, Marco Rubio, the New York senator Kirsten Gillibrand, and James Clapper, a former director of national intelligence, have recently indicated their belief in the possibility of intelligent non-human life.

SNIP

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TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: aliens; anythingcouldhappen; bank; england; financialcrisis

[yesthatjallen]

"The Bank of England declined to comment."

[E. Pluribus Unum]

Klaatu barada nikto

[AnglePark]

I can tell from the headline alone — this has Michael Snyder written all over it.

[Vermont Lt]

This story is such clickbait garbage.

The retired analyst is “telling” the BOE what they should do? I am sure the Bank is working overtime to take the advice of a retired analyst.

[HYPOCRACY]

Pretty sure Starmer has been probed by aliens.

[Leaning Right]

She’s kinda right. The UK must take immediate preventative action regarding aliens. But unfortunately, she’s identified the wrong kind of aliens.

Here ya go, Ms. McCaw.

[Texan5]

Ay, por favor-es una broma?

[AnglePark]

Well, darn — he may not have be the original author, but his site wasted no time picking it up. =D

[existentially_kuffer]

Dang, just call’em ‘alien’ but not ‘illegal alien’!! IDIOTS

[captmar-vell]

So now we need digital IDs, CBDCs tied to our Social Credit Scores and Dr Bill Gates approved Vaccine Passports. NOT because Satan wants us all ‘marked’ and controlled and catalogued for his ownership and authority like human cattle for his soon coming anti-Christ ‘Beast’ government to rise up for the last days across the entire Earth.

Well . . because there are aliens.

[algore]

[dfwgator]

[dennisw]

Never Mind the Bollocks, Here’s the Sex Pistols.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

The Bank of England must plan for a financial crisis being triggered by an official announcement confirming the existence of alien life, one of its former policy experts has claimed.

But how about the invasion of trans-dimensional elves riding dragons?

Do you have a plan for that?

[Pol-92064]

SpAcE AlIeNs run for your lives! YAAAAAA! Alex Jones was right! Wasn’t he?

[gnarledmaw]

That episode was just on a day or two ago. “Live” Dr Who channel on Roku. I had almost forgotten how much I liked it in the 80s.

[KarlInOhio]

They should worry about global warming causing more rain, thus more rainbows and the economy being destabilized by all the leprechaun gold thus inserted into the economy.

Or even worse if the leprechauns have switched to a fiat currency based on marshmallows.

[wally_bert]

One of my favorite classic Dr Who episodes.

[wally_bert]

State Of Decay is one of the best Baker episodes.

[Kenny Bania]