Posted on 04/03/2018 9:47:13 AM PDT by Kaslin
One of the most common questions I get when people find out about my wife and I recently having adopted is, “How old is your baby?” When I tell them “My baby is in high school and taller than me” I then get asked, “What made you decide to adopt a teenager?” among many other interesting questions and comments.
People say “That’s rough to have a teenager. Wouldn’t you want a baby?” The last time I checked all babies must go through teenage years to become adults. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with adopting a baby. Babies are cute and you can watch them grow. But there is also nothing wrong with adopting a teenager and in fact there are many good reasons to do so.
Aside from the obvious that one can also watch teenagers grow up, it is important to remember that orphaned teenagers need homes too. These orphaned teenagers are a particularly vulnerable population with only a few years left before they come upon what is called “aging out” and entering society without the forever family and social support system that the rest of us have.
Teenagers without forever families are very aware that their chances for being adopted are slim. Having a forever family is a redemptive lesson for a teenager. They remember their adoption, and that example is paramount to them in their life experience, relationships, and view of God.
There is also a practical element in adopting a teenager. In adopting a teenager, it is strongly likely that a prospective parent will have at least an idea of what they are going to get, unlike babies. You can talk to the orphaned teenager beforehand, often hosting them in your home as we did with our son. Using that time to find out their strengths and weaknesses, as well as dreams and hopes for the future is simply invaluable. The intellectual conversation one can have with many adopted teenagers is also deeply satisfying.
One of the most ridiculous things I have had said to me is, “Could you love a teenager that is not yours?” Our teenager is just that, our child. We laugh with him, we sorrow with him, and we pray with him. He also laughs at us because he is so far ahead technologically.
It is easy to love someone whom is not in your bloodline. Marriage attests to this. So does the sacrifice that many, such as soldiers, police officers, and firefighters, make for those whom they do not even know. When our not yet son arrived off the plane for a one-month hosting period, my wife and I knew he was our son by the end of the first day or two and we began the adoption process before he went back to his birth country. Sometimes you just know and sometimes the love grows on you. Often it is both.
The recent celebration of Easter attests that Jesus Christ is the best example of this kind of love. Jesus’ earthly father was not his biological father but loved Him so because of the love of the Heavenly Father. In fact, Jesus Christ is the best and clearest case for adoption for all ages.
The Biblical commandment in James 1:27, and countless other Biblical verses, to take care of orphans and widows is non-negotiable. Adoption is not about filling a void for parents but rather pouring into a child. And adoption does not make the parents better people than anyone else for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
Through His sacrifice Jesus Christ adopts those who accept His message and repent of sins into His household and kingdom. Jesus was never married and had no children. Yet, He offers us the free chance to be in His bloodline forever.
Adoption is merely, and at the same time powerfully, our minimum Christian duty and love in action. With this knowledge, adopting a teenager is what should be done for those whom Jesus called “the least of these.”
I can’t imagine being a teenager who has grown up with no parents, and if in the U.S., likely kicked around from one foster home to another.........There has to be a lot of emotional scars they have to deal with through out the rest of their lives.
Wasn’t it the Roman practice to adopt adults. Might not be a bad idea...................
I vaguely remember reading about a program that wasn’t exactly adoption in the legal sense, but was for teens about to age out of the system to have someone to turn to for parental guidance, a home to go to for holidays, a loving support system,etc.
People need loving families regardless of age.
I have a T shirt that says “AVAILABLE FOR ADOPTION” I’m 70, in my 2nd childhood and looking for rich parents.
I tried to adopt a massage therapist but my wife would not let me. Cute little chinese lady.
It just depends. I know a man that’s dad left when he was 4, his mom abandoned him when he was in the second grade. She literally just left home while he was at school, and he never heard from her again. With nowhere to go, he walked across the street to the neighbors, whose son was his best friend and playmate, they took him in and raised him (he still calls their kids brothers and sisters).
He is about 65, owns his own construction company, with about 50 employees. I’m not sure this could happen in today’s world, today’s neighbors would have called the government, with the predictable results.....failure.
“I’d like to adopt this 17 year old Korean girl I’ve had my eye on for a while.” Tom Hanks from the Bachelor Party”
LOL, that was the first thing I thought of.
-PJ
Hat’s off to anyone who adopts a teenager. Or older child.
But beware. There are plenty of drawbacks out there. The risks of having problems and difficulties is tremendous.
Just a positive for adoption - our pastor & wife adopted a very small boy from Africa. They were told he would probably never walk & would have many health issues. They didn’t care. They took him anyway to be raised with their other children. Fast forward about 6 years, he plays basketball & runs & smart as a whip! Love turned that boy around & sometimes, it’s enough
First thing he did as tribune was to get Cicero sent into exile.
This is awesome.
We adopted a 14 yo girl.
It was, for the most part, a very positive experience.
Unfortunately, when she turned 18, she decided to go live with her biological relatives in another state, a group of folks no judge would place her with while she needed someone.
She is a terrific girl, now a woman, but, had some deep issues.
I do wish her well.
Hat’s off to anyone who adopts a teenager. Or older child.
But beware. There are plenty of drawbacks out there. The risks of having problems and difficulties is tremendous.
Like getting stabbed while you sleep.......
Recent news in my town— teen aged adopted children, just up and stabbed the couple that took them in ..everyone was so surprised.
Wow, you may have found a solution for Liz Warren and her wish to be Indian!
This dude Clodius is one of the most interesting guys I never heard of before.
In 62 B.C. he was caught in Julius Caesar's house during a religious ceremony (Bona Dea) from which all men were barred--dressed as a woman. It was widely thought he was there to carry on an affair with Caesar's wife. Caesar divorced his wife but pretended to think she was innocent. When he was asked then why did he divorce her, he replied, "Caesar's wife must be above suspicion."
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