Posted on 02/13/2018 6:45:34 AM PST by Red Badger
Adviser to Khamenei says aid collectors for Palestinians sought to deploy reptiles whose skin 'attracted atomic waves'
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The former chief-of-staff of Irans armed forces said Tuesday that Western spies had used lizards to attract atomic waves and spy on his countrys nuclear program.
It was the latest in a long line of incidents of Western countries, including Israel, being accused of deploying secret agents from the animal kingdom.
Hassan Firuzabadi, senior military adviser to supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, was responding to questions from local media on the recent arrest of environmentalists.
He said he did not know the details of the cases, but that the West had often used tourists, scientists and environmentalists to spy on Iran.
Several years ago, some individuals came to Iran to collect aid for Palestine We were suspicious of the route they chose, he told the reformist ILNA news agency.
In their possessions were a variety of reptile desert species like lizards, chameleons We found out that their skin attracts atomic waves and that they were nuclear spies who wanted to find out where inside the Islamic Republic of Iran we have uranium mines and where we are engaged in atomic activities, he said.
Firuzabadi said Western spy agencies had failed every time.
His comments came after news that a leading Iranian-Canadian environmentalist, Kavous Seyed Emami, had committed suicide in prison after he was arrested along with other members of his wildlife NGO last month.
Several spying allegations involving various creatures have been leveled against Israel over the past years.
In January 2016, Lebanese residents captured a griffon vulture wearing an Israeli tracking device, but released it upon realizing that the transmitter strapped to the bird was intended for scientific research rather than espionage.
Several months earlier, Hamas claimed to have caught a dolphin wearing Israeli spying equipment.
Twice in recent years, Turkish media has highlighted allegations that birds tagged with Israeli university tracking devices were on espionage missions.
In 2012, an eagle with an Israeli tag in Sudan was captured and alleged to be as a Mossad spy.
Two years earlier, an Egyptian official said Israel-controlled sharks may have been involved in a number of attacks on tourists in the Red Sea.
Why so surprised. It's something we do in this country. We have various names for our reptilians. You know, like Valarie, Barack , Chuckie, Joe, Adam, Al, Andy, Maxine, Nancy...
We even give them surnames..
Here's one now..
*grin*
Thank you, Red Badger, for the use of your thread!
(Signed)
The Entire Crew of the USS Undead Orbiter
In the next frame, his tongue zaps out to slurp up a fly.
Returned from library, had brief nap, cup of tea, now I’m going to Walmart: we’re almost out of cat food.
If Walmart was open when I want to go, I’d go early tomorrow morning to get the Usual Staples, if I had enough...but I’ll have to start going to WinCo, and that means I’ll need gas again. If it ain’t one darn thing... sex me mum.
Dang they found out about the lizards..cue the snakes
Unfortunately EweToob is censoring that video...
Elen got distracted and forgot to pick Sally up at school. It’s only just that Sally should have to wait for a change ...
Bump
This is the mentality, and some people think it’s okay to let them have nuclear energy.
They’re lucky to be able to handle fire & electricity.
A thing about many lizards is that as soon as it gets dark and the temperature drops a little, they just lie down on the sand until it gets hot the next morning. Seems like a weakness in a spy-animal.
Real image: lizard with about 3" of tail ending in a stump.
The solution... Jihadi Roadrunners. The Velociraptor of the bird world.
Eh, look at that tiny bill. He’s not going to choke down a bearded dragon.
On the other hand, if you irradiate the roadrunners for a few generations ...
Maybe I can round up some roadrunners and cart them over to Area 5 at Sandia National Lab.
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