I poked a teacher on the butt in the second grade. I had my hand up and she kept going around the room to other kids. So when she was finally near my desk the only part of her that was in reach was her rear end. She was annoyed with me. I didn’t care, I had a question. I wish I could remember what she looked like so I could either remember it fondly or strike it from my memory.
That does it! You are totally unfit for public office!