Let’s have fun and make up fake names and testimonials to Obamacare.
So if you were playing the Moby and plumping Obamacare, what would you say?
Here’s FenelonSpike’s opening bid:
I’m Mark Christian, PhD and I live in Gainesville, FL.
I wouldn’t miss going to church every Sunday and I sing in the praise band . I am a strong proponent of the second amendment, don’t support abortion and didn’t vote for President Obama either time. I wouldn;t miss NASCAR or FOX news. But I want you to know that I checked out the Affordable Care Act and it is both affordable and caring. Sign up Now!!!
MWR bids:
I’m Beth Abrams of Salt Lake City, UT, and I have an MBA from Brigham Young University. You could say I’m a Republican, if by “Republican” you mean “founder of the local Rush Limbaugh Dittohead Fanclub,” or maybe, “the lady who DVRs every episode of The O’Reilly Factor,” or even, “the one with an airbrushed Bald Eagle on the side of her Ford F-150 and a ‘Reagan/Bush ‘84’ bumper sticker.” If that’s what you mean by “Republican,” then yeah, I guess I’m kind of a Republican.
And I’m here to tell you that Obamacare WORKS.
Matticus bids:
Hi, I’m Bill Prescott. On my way to Hobby Lobby, I stopped by a Chic-Fil-A to get a #1 with extra pickles. I usually eat while I read the latest from The Blaze, but decided to give the ACA website a shot. I’ll be durned if the thing wasn’t the most easy-to-navigate website I’ve encountered in quite some time. And the prices? Well, let me just tell you that I was very pleased. ACA rocks!
Lincolntf bids game:
Just got back from the gun range, ready to start homeschooling all nine kids. My sister-wives were busy beating the Devil out of a haunted set of curtains, so I picked up the mail. I couldn’t believe my eyes! Our insurance rates have gone from $4,000 a month, without the Gout Plan, to just 14 bucks, with full Gout Coverage!
“Tex Texas” doubles:
As a severely conservative Republican, I really hate Obama. Not because he’s a sh*tty president, but because he’s black.
So anyway, a couple months ago I was leaving the monthly Klan rally and saw a gay wedding going on across the street. Naturally, I went over and curb stomped those queermos one after the other until all of a sudden, I broke my foot.
Three months later, my foot is all healed up and I didn’t pay jack shit. Thanks, Obamacare!
Hollowpoint redoubles:
I’m Cliff Redmond, and am a lifelong Republican Christian Conservative. I did not vote for Obama because he was secretly born another country. I forget which, the one with all the colored people. Quebec I think.
An injury I sustained while taking part in a lynching after a big meth binge has left me with a pre-existing condition that prevents me from getting traditional medical care. At times the pain in my back is so severe I can’t even make love to my sister. At least not in the “normal” way like God intended.
While trying to distract me from beating my sister-wife for nagging me about the moonshine still, my nephew-son showed my all the Obamacare options available to me. I shot the computer for being the work of the Devil, but a local navigator was able to take my information over the phone and get me enrolled.
Thanks to the Affordable Care Act, I can now afford things I never thought possible. It’s enabled me to buy Copenhagen instead of that cheap Grizzly stuff, and even a shirt with sleeves on it.
Thanks, Obama!
Posted by: Hollowpoint
I like those, 2nd.
Too funny I have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard.
He "hates it" when the ACA is dragged through the mud?
I think not.
IF this person exists, and was a "republican" he wouldn't be stupid enough to have every single democrat talking point down.
I really don't care if he watches Fox.
Real "republicans" don't preface their remarks with supposedly conservative credentials that can't be checked out or proven.
And so he claims to only pay $62 per month?
Really?
Name the phantom insurance company you obtained such a policy from, and show me the cancelled checks from premiums paid.
THEN show me a "doctor" or hospital that accepts your Obamacare insurance.
IF this phony can provide real evidence that he actually has his health care paid for, I'll shut my yap.
Until then, the guy is a lying sack of crap.
And I mean no disrespect to sacks of crap.
yee haw
So glad to see you back LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY!!!!
Brilliant.
LOL...great stuff !!
LOL!
What does “playing the Moby” mean?
This may be the funniest thing I have ever read on this site.
I don’t care who you are, that there is funny.