[Impala64ssa]

If only Stanley Ann Dunham's baby daddy shot himself in his package about 52 years ago...

[Ruy Dias de Bivar]

Was he using military BALL ammo?

[Zuben Elgenubi]

"That'll wake you up in the morning, boy"

[ImJustAnotherOkie]

He’ll be singing a different tune ala Soprano’s.

[Jack of all Trades]

I guess yah doesn’t have to call him Johnson anymore.

[basil]

Do we know who he was?

[Road Warrior ‘04]

Another Amish yute?

[HereInTheHeartland]

I thought it was bad when my phone pocket dialed someone.

[SampleMan]

First rule of thug gun carry - don’t use a holster.

Did Obamacare pay for this birth control? If not, why not?

[Gay State Conservative]

It's like shooting off your....wait a minute,no it isn't.

[circlecity]

I guess the de-cocking lever also describes what will happen if you DON’T use it.

[moovova]

"Joseph Josephine Johnson, 40, has been released from the hospital and booked into the Multnomah County Jail..."

[Exeter]

Just Nature’s way of stopping the wrong people from procreating, the gene pool has enough dead leaves floating in it already, don’t need to add more...

[Buckeye McFrog]

Quick, someone check Lexis-Nexis and find out when exactly John Boehner did this...

[Starstruck]

Joseph Johnson, 40, has been released from the hospital and booked into the Multnomah County Jail on charges of first-degree robbery, second-degree assault and felon in possession of a firearm.

He shot the other guy while robbing him. What do you have to do to get first-degree assault?

[showme_the_Glory]

Not fun going off half cocked

[Charles Martel]

[Ken H]

That took balls!

[gov_bean_ counter]

Awww nuts.

[Exeter]

Look on the bright side, when he files for Social Security he’s got that “disabled” category aced...

[yefragetuwrabrumuy]

His new nickname is “squeaky”.