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They didn’t do an analysis, their parents didn’t push them to adulthood. They were basically raised like dogs, once they stopped peeing on the carpet further development was not expected. So they got up to the point of being 16 and found life to be perfect, they access to a car, they had access to money, they had no responsibilities, and they were quite comfortable. And they’re parents are willing to put up with it year after year after year.

I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve had the exact same conversation with David’s (my nephew-in-law) parents and grandparents. They say they don’t know what to do with him, I say kick him out and cut him off, they say they can’t do that. 2 months before I graduated high school my mom sat me down and explained I was going to be an adult soon and with that came responsibilities, I was getting June for free as a graduation present, I was getting July for free as a birthday present, but August 1 I was paying rent, how much rent depended on what kind of job I got, but no job was not going to equate to no rent I’d have to work it off around the house. In the 26 years since I’ve spent less than a cumulative year unemployed. David’s family doesn’t even expect him to do basic chores.

We’ve got a large group of parents out there that quite simply didn’t parent. And for their punishment they have 16 year-olds in their 30s.

Somewhere along the line they did an analysis. It may not stack up to our expectations, but they came to a decision to avoid going out into the world on their own. Obviously it wasn't as extensive as it should have been.

You touch on an interesting point. Their parents didn't push them. I agree. So now it's hard to lay all the blame on the adult children. Their parents basically failed them. If their parents aren't okay with what's taking place it's time to make some changes.

You begin by charging rent. Start it at certain amount and raise it quarterly. If they want to, raise it by $100 a month. Explain to the kid it's time to get on with their life, you've got your own to live.

Your mom did you a favor. I'll bet you were a little peeved at the time, but you knew something was going to happen, things were about to change.

I'm a little perplexed by the parents and grandparents here. Why are they having such a hard time figuring this out?

I know it seems like I'm defending the kids, and with regard to some things I am. I don't excuse all of it. And there's no excusing the parent's part in this either.

I agree with your conclusion. They do have 16 year olds in their 30s.