Posted on 10/01/2012 2:10:41 PM PDT by smoothsailing
October 1, 2012 4:15 P.M.
Cambridge, Mass.--- Celebrated historian Bertram Oxley has uncovered a memorandum from former Japanese Emperor Hirohito to Admiral Yamamoto dated December 6, 1941, showing that the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor was motivated by an offensive film made by Charlie Chaplin ridiculing Japanese cuisine.
Contrary to historical accounts over the last seventy years, Professor Oxley said in an interview today with the BBC, What appeared to be a meticulously planned surprise attack was actually a spontaneous demonstration by moderate sushi connoisseurs in the Imperial Navy in response to a hateful and offensive movie. Thereafter, extremist elements within the Japanese military co-opted the spontaneous attack, transforming it into the overseas contingency operation sometimes referred to as World War II.
The discovery has created a sensation in scholarly circles. This is a remarkable find, declared Reginald Smythe, chairman of the Progressive Historians Assocation and former Obama State Department official. Had President Roosevelt condemned this movie instead of uttering that infernal Day of Infamy provocation the war could have been avoided and millions of lives would have been saved.
Reached at his home in Houston, former President George H. W. Bush, an aviator in the Pacific during the war, expressed skepticism. Its simply inconceivable that the Japanese First Air Fleet, with six aircraft carriers, could have staged a spur of the moment attack on an island thousands of nautical miles from the Japanese homeland with such stealth and precision. Most experts dismissed Mr. Bushs remarks, however, since its widely understood that World War II was primarily his sons fault.
White House spokesman Jay Carney, asked this afternoon about the memos discovery stated, Of course, hindsights 20-20. But one can only wonder how much pain and suffering could have been averted had FDR simply apologized to Hirohito at the outset.
Fortunately, Carney continued, waving off questions from White House reporters anxious to return to questions about Mitt Romneys grooming habits, Weve evolved to a more sophisticated strategy of leading from behind, so were unlikely to repeat the disastrous mistakes of the past.
Splendid!
:-)
Somewhat out of order. Too many people lost their lives in WW II for it to be used for fun and bullcrap.
;)
Too soon?
"You now, there's millions of violent, Islamic morons in the world who are too stupid to be allowed to breathe. We're stepping up our drone attacks and adding nuclear weapons to the payload. The world could do just fine without most of he people from the mideast save Israel. They can take that anyway they want, but if they want an apology, they can stick it where the sun doesn't shine."
I was sure this was from the Onion.
Oh, please.
My grandmother said it best, stand for something or you will fall for anything.
This sounds rather, revisionist to me.
It’s not a “fun” piece. It’s bitter irony.
We are going to WISH for the days when only 50 million died in a war, if anyone is still alive...
Pssst, it’s satire.
Gee. And all this while I believed that the war with Japan was due to the stupid FDR regime dictating to Britain that they sever their long-term relationship with Japan!
Pssssst, click the link, not satire.
As long as we nuke them in the end I don’t care how it starts.
“You now, there’s millions of violent, Islamic morons in the world who are too stupid to be allowed to breathe. We’re stepping up our drone attacks and adding nuclear weapons to the payload. The world could do just fine without most of he people from the mideast save Israel. They can take that anyway they want, but if they want an apology, they can stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.”
We had better at least elect a president who is willing to take Islam at face value and act accordingly. The Muzzies tried this “world domination” trick a few centuries ago and failed. Now they have much better weaponry and less well-motivated adversaries (at least as of this moment). They are coming, and they’re coming for everyone who doesn’t buy into their peanut-sized brains idea that Mo Ham Head was something special. It a way, they act just like Democrats, our way, or else!
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