OMG! They’re Selling Guns In Arizona! To Almost Anyone! OMG!

The Truth About Guns ^ | 6 August, 2012 | Dan Zimmerman

[marktwain]

It can be hard for those of us stranded out here in flyover country — what with dodging the Indians’ flaming arrows and digging our Conestogas out of them durned wheel ruts — to fully grok the anti-gun, pro-disarmament POV so prevalent among those who inhabit the left and right coasts. Not to mention a few conspicuous points in between. But it’s always useful to put yourself in the shoes of those on the other side, if for no other reason that plot better ways to counter their arguments. Not that that was what Jeanne Marie Laskas was doing with her piece in GQ. No, she embarked on her foray into the wilds of a Yuma, Arizona gun store more as an anthropological expedition . . .

Chronicling the mysterious people in the middle is apparently a big thing for Laskas. Her new book, Hidden America: From Coal Miners to Cowboys, an Extroardinary Exploration of the Unseen People Who Make This Country Work, comes out next week. So she apparently knows how to dress (and maybe even talk!) in these strange and foreign lands.

In this excursion, though, she ventured west “to listen to the conversation the rest of America was apparently having” about guns in the wake of some recent high-profile shootings. As pervasive and integral a part of American culture as guns are, Laskas wondered “If an armed citizenry is a piece of our national identity, how is it that I’d never even met it?”

Just a thought, but immersing yourself in the east coast media culture (she’s a former WaPo columnist and Contributing Editor at Esquire) could have something to do with it. Maybe.

Anyway, once she finally dug up a store willing to take her in, she spent some quality time with the folks who own, operate and patronize Sprague’s Sports, observing the indigenous fauna as they prowled the gun counters and ranges. But despite the experience you’d have to think she acquired while researching her book, it was hard to tamp down all that northeast corridor parochialism. She took the opportunity to pose some challenging questions to a member of the store’s sales staff…who was more than ready for it.

“I’m kind of surprised you carry assault rifles,” I said to Ron.

“There’s no such thing as an assault rifle,” he said. “These are ‘military-style rifles’ or ‘modern sporting rifles.’ ”

“But they’re assault rifles,” I noted. I knew that much from TV.

“Assault is one of the worst things the media has ever done to us,” he said. “Have any of these rifles ever assaulted anyone?”

Again, from the perspective of the limited circles in which Laskas runs (she a creative writing professor at the University of Pittsburgh), guns are something “those damn people” think they need.

Nobody in my circle back east had guns, nobody wanted them, and if anybody talked about them, it was in cartoon terms: Guns are bad things owned by bad people who want to do bad things. About the only time the people where I come from thought about guns was when something terrible happened. A lunatic sprays into a crowd and we have the same conversation we always have: those damn guns and those damn people who insist on having them.

Just a guess, but it looks like Jeanne’s not a regular DGU of the Day reader.

But give her some credit. During her time in the borderland area store, she bought herself an M&P 15-22 and a Glock 19. She couls barely contain her horror and revulsion, though, when a customer complimented her on her rifle choice, telling her that he’d just bought the same gun for his six-year-old.

Ultimately, the conversations with all the exotic gun people, some of whom betray their fears of the regulations anti-gunners would be only too happy to impose, were a little too much for her.

In the end, I went over to the indoor range to blow off some steam and to release my mind from the endless loop of stupid-scary.

But it’s a funny thing about those guns and the people who choose to own them. In Laskas’ case, they may have — may have — made her reconsider her POV. A little.

I kept thinking about neighbors. You have this crazy family living next door. One day you go over with a pie, figuring if you just confronted the crazy, you’d understand it and find acceptance. Then you discover that all this time they think you’re the crazy family. The more you try to explain yourself, the crazier you sound, and if you stay long enough, you probably will be.

These were burdensome thoughts, and I wanted to get rid of them. I rented an Uzi, fully automatic. I chose the male zombie. I think he was supposed to be a lawyer. He had a briefcase. I aimed for his left eyeball and pulled the trigger. The patter of thirty-two bullets lasted maybe three seconds, and then the eyeball was gone. The release felt like one gorgeous, fantastic sneeze, and the satisfaction reminded me of cold beer.

Come on in, Jeanne. The water’s fine.

[az_gila]

Yeah, it is kind of awesome how you can be sitting in a nice, air conditioned, lovely suburban home, with that kind of great wildlife just stopping by in your backyard.

Nowadays though, I’d be worried that the EPA might see those pictures and declare your pool a protected wetland ecosystem for endangered owls :S

---

We are on a non-dividable 7 acres, and development around us is pushing more wildlife our way.

If they want to make 5 acres a wildlife preserve and lower our property taxes accordingly...

[az_gila]

Or rattlers under your potted plants....

Who then took off for a swim across our pool.

[Ditter]

We live right in the center of Houston and have seen all kinds of critters in our back yard. Raccoons, possums, swamp rabbits, squirrels, huge rats, skunks, owls and all kinds of birds and coyotes but thankfully no bears. Yikes that would be awful!

[Boogieman]

Just don’t start a petting zoo, the kitties may look cute, but the first time they open up a neighbor kids’ jugular, your insurance premiums are going to go through the roof!

[Redcitizen]

Hostile Indians...

You should have called me. lol! Course I can’t shoot arrows worth a darn.

[marktwain]

I would not have wanted to get them too excited. They were pretty much newbies with guns.

[stephenjohnbanker]

George Foreman: “ They were just hongray !

[stephenjohnbanker]

One rattler per fish caught : )

[stephenjohnbanker]

” Or rattlers under your potted plants...”

Mine was behind a potted plant too....lurking

[saminfl]

I had some HO model train track and cork roadbed in a paper bag on the garage floor and they had their snouts in that bag.

[stephenjohnbanker]

At least they weren’t trying to assemble it.

[saminfl]

LOL