Yes, I’m wondering what his definition of “porn” is. And, no doubt, we live in a trashy sex-obsessed culture (not so different from many before us), but that doesn’t necessarily equate to massive addictions to pornography.
Every other man coming to the confessional reporting they had looked at “porn” — I’d think I’d have to ask what they meant. Or maybe I’ve been living a sheltered life and the hardcore stuff really does enjoy that kind of widespread popularity. Soft porn, or things that weren’t even intended as more than “sexy” but could be viewed through lustful eyes, is not hard at all to get.
Yes, I’m wondering what his definition of “porn” is.
I can’t define porn uniformly for all people, because I could guarantee you that every addict had a completely different kind of taste in terms of what he lusted after. However, you can define addiction, through the definition as given in the 12-step program:
A person cannot seem to go for a period of say, a single day, without the use of a substance. They might even reflexively perform the action or use the substance as a routine, such as first thing in the morning.
A person cannot simply interrupt the completion of his use of the substance for the sake of more immediate or important matters such as work, family, chores, etc. The person feels a determination to continue working and continuing his or her euphoria from the sensations associated with the substance. Examples include getting high from a drug, or remaining in a state of prolonged sexual arousal from use of sexual imagery, or sexual acts, or in the case of food, involving keeping the taste of a food consumed in one’s body, such as flour, sugar, candy, and who knows how many other kinds of food.
A person is emotionally and mentally dependent on the activity or substance, they do not feel fulfilled when they spend time without it.
In either situation, the person has an appetite for an activity or for a substance, because it somehow makes them feel pleasure. They feel that they are going without it, they even almost subconsciously use or do it as a reflex.
More details can be found on the outlines for various 12-step programs, and believe me the list is long, and perhaps in no way complete for all the classifiable addictions which can be found out there.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twelve-Step_Program
one of the things I often recommend is to look at the description of the first six steps, and then replace alcohol with some activity or some substance you use on a daily basis, and see if it matches that description. In fact, that outline is pretty much how I came to admit I needed serious help on some matters myself.
I will say as well, that porn, or at least indulging in certain materials to feel sexually aroused is incredibly varied to the point where even all I can say is a general definition: if you are using something in media, just to make yourself feel sexual pleasure, that media is porn to you, and you are messing around with how your body and mind function.
Yes, I am a former user myself, and glad to be sober, after plenty a struggle.