Problem solved.
Posted on 11/01/2011 3:25:07 PM PDT by MindBender26
A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a ancient wooden device called a "slide-rule" and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-Gebra is a problem for us," the Attorney General said. "Al-Gebra has terrorized many young people for years. They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country."
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle.'" When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes."
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.
It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.
Al-Gebra terrorized me in my high school days.
It’s been around a long time.
;)
Message in a bathroom stall: “Real engineers work it out with a pencil”.
I’m waiting for someone to post a link to Tom Lehrer’s “New Math”. I’m on An iPhone in Turkey, so I cannot.
Only in an elliptical manner.
I survived Al Gebra but was destroyed by Geo-Metry.......
01001000 01100001 01101000 01100001
Good one!
Yes, but you have to order them from the same manufacturer that makes abacus batteries.
I don’t get it.
Problem solved.
Well, that’s where the public school system left me off.
Then I encountered a math prof at college who could actually teach the stuff and make it make sense.
And then the homeschooling filled in the gaps. I learned more by homeschooling my kids than I ever learned out of 12 years of public education, and that was back in the days when you were told that you weren’t in school to socialize.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.