To: PowderMonkey
LOL! I’ve seen people routinely eviscerated at staff meetings for using hollow and meaningless descriptors like “growing”, “HOT”, “fine” and “check” in their management briefings.Not ONE of those words is used in MY management briefing: Our firm has exhibited leadership by enhancing the facilitation of synergystic, scalable core-competancy paradigm-shifts vis-a-vis the most granular service point of difference, empowering the ongoing assurance of the product architecture being functionally equivalent and parallel to the longitudinal business-practice shift postulated by the use of mission-critical management dialogue technology on a go-forward basis, in accordance with ISO-9001:2008 standards
10 posted on
10/08/2011 5:35:12 AM PDT by
Lazamataz
("If Herman Cain does become President, his Vice President will be known as Co-Cain." -- Laz, 2011)
To: Lazamataz
Dang...I stand in awe. Mind if I borrow that for my next briefing?
13 posted on
10/08/2011 5:39:06 AM PDT by
PowderMonkey
(WILL WORK FOR AMMO)
To: Lazamataz
A couple of more buzzwords, and soon you will be CEO!.
16 posted on
10/08/2011 5:41:43 AM PDT by
factoryrat
(We are the producers, the creators. Grow it, mine it, build it.)
To: Lazamataz
Haha — and don’t forget to “leverage the low-hanging fruit going forward.” :-D
To: Lazamataz; PowderMonkey
Our firm has exhibited leadership by enhancing the facilitation of synergystic, scalable core-competancy paradigm-shifts vis-a-vis the most granular service point of difference, empowering the ongoing assurance of the product architecture being functionally equivalent and parallel to the longitudinal business-practice shift postulated by the use of mission-critical management dialogue technology on a go-forward basis, in accordance with ISO-9001:2008 standards
I'd love to have seen
Richard Mitchell's take on the quote above.
20 posted on
10/08/2011 5:57:10 AM PDT by
aruanan
To: Lazamataz
I was about to say That's nothing but Yak Squeeze! until I got to "in accordance with ISO-9001:2008 standards".
Well...ok, then. That's more like it. Good to finally hear some straight talk!
24 posted on
10/08/2011 6:24:31 AM PDT by
GBA
(The Constitution and conservatism must win in 2012!)
To: Lazamataz
ISO ~ my eyes glaze over.
25 posted on
10/08/2011 6:25:45 AM PDT by
muawiyah
To: Lazamataz
LOL! May I use that beautiful multi-syllabic monstrosity in my next memo?
One of the small pleasures I allow myself at work is to edit out all the cheerleading pom-pom waving boilerplate and b/s that infest the management memos which cascade into my office email every day.
The length of any given memo is usually reduced by 40-50 pct.
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