Posted on 04/09/2010 3:05:56 PM PDT by SmartInsight
A 7-year-old Russian boy adopted by an American family last year was put on a return flight to Moscow this week because of violent and psychotic behavior, according to a Tennessee grandmother.
Once the child learned enough English, he told his new family about the horrors of his previous life, including being beaten at the orphanage after his mother abandoned him, she said.
He also told of an incident in which he burned down a building near the orphanage, she said.
Hansen said the child had a "hit list" of people he was targeting, including her daughter, who he said he "wanted to kill for the house." He threatened to kill her grandson for a videogame, she said.
The final incident that convinced Hansen she should send the boy back to Russia was when she caught him starting a fire with papers in his bedroom last Monday, she said. She feared the child might burn down the house and kill her family, she said.
(Excerpt) Read more at edition.cnn.com ...
Well, maybe the article did not explain all the options that the family went through but sometimes you have to take the well being of all compared to that of one... Not sure it was the right decision - but only the family had the right to make it. We can sit back and second guess all we want with little effect.
******UPDATE:**************
Russian Boy May Return to Tennessee
“If it was necessary, they asked if we could use one of our foster families here in Tennessee to help take care of the little boy.”
Savely points out that Savelyev is now a citizen of the United States as well as Russia. The boy has reportedly been moved to an orphanage in Moscow and is undergoing a battery of medical exams.
Russian orphans have some serious issues. Any American adopting a Russian child needs to be fully prepared to address unexpected emotional behavior.
An associate pastor (and his wife) at our church adopted a set of Russian, twin boys when the boys were five years old. The twins are now nine years old and beginning to ask questions about deviant sexual behavior. They are recalling things that older boys in the orphanage did to them, others, and animals. Needless to say, the pastor and his wife have their hands full.
What the adoptive mother did might have been a bit extreme, but you’re under no obligation to keep someone in your home when they’ve made credible threats to your family’s lives.
The child is not just someone. The child is this person’s child. She is legally responsible for him. Period. If she wanted to relinquish, she had to do it legally. She is his legal parent. He is her legal child, not just a houseguest.
Adoption of orphans from Romania
http://encyclopedia.adoption.com/entry/Romanian-adoptions/316/1.html
After the repressive Ceausescu regime was overthrown in late 1989, the world became aware of thousands of children who were warehoused in Romanian orphanages. Experts estimated that between 100,000 and 300,000 children lived in these baby homes or orphanages for the school-aged or in institutions for persons considered to be “irrecuperable” (unrecoverable). Most children experienced severe emotional and physical deprivation.
The simultaneous adoptions of so many Romanian orphans provided researchers with a unique opportunity to view the impact of adoption on primarily institutionalized babies and young children. Many of the children experienced developmental delays and emotional problems, while others successfully adapted to their new families.
Most of the children were in poor physical health and significant numbers were malnourished, had infectious diseases, and nutritional, growth and developmental issues.
In addition, behavioral problems such as temper tantrums, rocking, sleep disorder problems and indiscriminate friendliness occurred.
Not all the findings were positive. Some of the children continued to experience serious behavioral problems as well as difficulty attaching to their adoptive parents.
I don’t doubt that perhaps this child was a handful or even violent, BUT you don’t just give up on a child in that manner. If this had been her biological child, I doubt anyone would have any sympathy for her, and it is untelling what tragedy this child has seen in his homeland.
This alleged mother sent this child alone to Russia to be picked up by someone whose references she read online and is fortunate the child didn’t end up murdered! I didn’t read anywhere where the mother sought any sort of psychatric help for the child.
I understand it can be difficult, and trying, but something about this lady’s side of the story just doesn’t ring 100% true to me. She didn’t contact the agency - she found a lawyer online? She checks the driver out online? Does she not have a phone? And now her mother, not her, is defending her to CNN.
I realize not everyone sees the world the same way I do, but I just couldn’t imagine giving up on one of my dogs that I’ve rescued, much less a human child!
Read the story again. GRANDMOTHER did all of this and talks about HER ability to parent. There’s something rotten here (besides the obvious terrible treatment of a child).
lolololol has anyone seen “Orphan” lmao
I worked with a lady whose natural born son was diagnosed with severe mental problems, tried to kill her and her husband, killed their pets, etc. You would not believe the daily crap she had to go through to keep him locked up.......scary, scary kid.
I also knew of someone who adopted a young boy at 6, cutest thing you ever saw, after a few weeks things started to arise, no big deal, they social workers said it was to be expected with the adjustment and all. They were awakened by the screams of their daughter who was a few yrs. older, in the middle of the night, the little boy was violently attacking her, and things went downhill from there. They had lots of money for treatment, etc. came to find out this kid was so damaged in his early childhood development he was dangerous.
Everyone thinks that they can be the one to “change” these children, with love and stability, I do think most can, but there are definitely a few that there is no helping no matter what and the social workers want them MOVED! They leave a lot unsaid. Think about it, it is cheaper for them it have the kid adopted and become the responsibility of someone else.
Sorry - misunderstood. If the grandmother was the one arranging all this, this says perhaps the lady didn’t disclose information about her mental well being.
Please don’t be sorry. I’m just saying there’s something strange going on here. Many on this forum have blamed the child. There’s more here than meets the eye.
We were not given any of her history by the County DSS.
She was then placed with an older couple. After several months she was caught trying to sexually abuse their grand daughter. After she was removed from their house they found a Barbie doll that my mother had given the child. The doll had been mutilated by a steak knife that she had stolen from their kitchen and kept with the doll. They were never told any of her history with us.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder
I could go on about a child that a friend of mine adopted also from Russia that had almost identical issues.
Government and adoptive agencies have no reason to give out any of this information, there interest is in getting rid of these children before they can do harm to others in the system. Maybe that sounds jaded but that has been the experience that I and others I now and trust have had.
Sending this child packing and out of their lives was the smartest thing they could do.
The orphanage was the one who did not disclose the serious behavioral problems the kid exhibited while still in Russia — having set fire to a building near the orphanage, was just one of the things. They misrepresented that the kid was just fine.
I feel sorry for the child and obviously the Mother and Grandmother didn’t handle things as they should have, but if the kid at age 7 is a danger to the family, they didn’t want to wait until he actually sets the house on fire or kills their natural child.
The mother did right by sending this horror back to Russia. All those who think she should have kept him to ruin and endanger her short life and her family’s short life and pay threw the nose to try and fix something that could never be fixed are crazy.
No one on this thread can tell me you haven’t returned something you bought and found when you took it home it was damaged.
actually until the adoption is finalized, they can be sent back.
They may not be vcrs but they are returnable. Have seen several adoption disruptions. Sad, but at times needed.
An older child placement is not like your natural child. There needs to be a bond and commitment. Obviously this did not happen. Better back in Russia instead of clogging our mental health system and welfare system.
It is difficult to give up on anyone, but this case warranted just that.
adoptions can be and are recinded. Most are not finalized for a year. Better to return.
“Sending this child packing and out of their lives was the smartest thing they could do.”
I agree with you 100%.
I don’t doubt that perhaps this child was a handful or even violent, BUT you don’t just give up on a child in that manner. If this had been her biological child, I doubt anyone would have any sympathy for her, and it is untelling what tragedy this child has seen in his homeland.
Peole give their damaged bio children to the state often. There used to be homes for these children where they were cared for, nothing fancy but no one suffered. These days they are bounced from one theraputic foster home to another and lots of “professionals” make monies off of them courtesy of the state.
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