Disappointment as US high school students snub 'lesbian-friendly prom'

Telegraph ^

[TigerLikesRooster]

Disappointment as US high school students snub 'lesbian-friendly prom'

Senior prom fell far short of the rite of passage Constance McMillen was hoping for when she began a legal battle to challenge a ban on same-sex dates.

Published: 7:00AM BST 07 Apr 2010

Constance McMillen Photo: AP

The 18-year-old lesbian student said that she was one of only seven students to show up at a private party chaperoned by school officials. She said the rest of her peers went to another private event where she wasn't invited.

"It was not the prom I imagined," she said. "It really hurts my feelings. These are still people who I've gone through school with, even teachers who loved me before this all started. I've never been a bad student and I don't feel like I deserve to be put through this."

Her case drew a national spotlight after she and the American Civil Liberties Union challenged an Itawamba County School District rule that banned same-sex prom dates and a requirement that only male students wear tuxedos. Proms are parties held for students, generally in their senior year in high school.

The ACLU sent a demand letter to Superintendent Teresa McNeece in February, saying the rules against same-sex prom dates and girls wearing tuxedos violated Miss McMillen's constitutional rights. The district responded by withdrawing its sponsorship and cancelling the April 2 event.

In an apparent compromise, school district officials said parents would organise a private event with school chaperones that Miss McMillen could attend.

[xsmommy]

oh Lord reading those replies makes my head want to explode!

[beaversmom]

Yep—I hear you!

[HiTech RedNeck]

BTW, they DID give the policy, and she got the ACLU to bulldoze the school in court over it. Follow the history.

[CA Conservative]

Completely appalling.

I'm sorry, what was appalling? That the other students chose to have their own party, rather than be put into an uncomfortable position of appearing to support this young woman's lifestyle choice?

I think the students handled it rather maturely. They didn't make a big deal or call the girl names - they just developed an alternative. If the young lesbian got her feeling hurt because no on showed up to a party that had become all about her and her lifestyle, that's too bad.

[xsmommy]

i hope snakedoc is comfortable being of a like mind with that group there. wooooeeeeee!

[roamer_1]

Whether it was appropriate, in a Christian context, for other kids to ostracize her (and six others) — even if she brought it on herself — is another question entirely.

I see where you are coming from... But I would submit that the "exclusion" of only 7 people is evidence against your claim... There are certainly more than 7 kids in the "out" crowd, especially when including geeks and freaks... It seems the party which replaced the prom was remarkably inclusive - and those few that chose the prom instead were there of their own volition.

[CajunConservative]

You are forgetting that most kids text each other by phone. I doubt there was any breach of privacy going on here. The STUDENTS planned the private party and Ms. McMillen knew about it because she texted someone and asked if she was invited.

I was reading on the local news site that the first parent planned prom was canceled because little miss prima donna failed to purchase the required tickets on time and they were afraid of being sued. After the first private parent sponsored prom was canceled a few of the parents went ahead and planned the prom that was for the school.

Maybe because this selfish brat failed to do anything according to the rules in place the other seniors had enough of her crap and took things in their own hands because it was their prom too.

[SnakeDoctor]

>> I sense Snakey is reacting off feelings, not a sound mind in Christ — like I would have, before I became a believer, and sometimes still did until I knew the wisdom of the scriptures at a heart level.

I base my position on how I would want my kids to act in this situation. No “feelings” are involved.

>> If Snakey is so worried about ministering to Constance, note that the news coverage is conspicuously silent about anything else that came before and after. For all we know, some parents asked Constance over for dinner for the next 7 nights.

So? For all we know, they’ll never speak to her again (which I believe is more likely). I’m not worried about her ... I am worried about how the other kids behavior reflects on them.

Like I said, my position is based on how I would want my kids to behave ... not on some feelings-based pity for the poor lesbian girl, or some misplaced claim of a rights violation.

(1) I would want my kids to stand their ground morally — homosexuality is wrong, and always will be.
(2) I would want rules for the party that should’ve been in place for the prom ... no same-gendered dates, no cross dressing, etc. Do not compromise your values to accommodate sin.
(3) Given those provisos, I would want my kid to extend friendship to the outcast and invite her to the party so long as she agrees to the rules of the private party. If she agrees, great ... have fun. If not, we did our best, and she’s made her choice.

SnakeDoc

[SnakeDoctor]

Non-invitation of seven out of three-hundred constitutes ostracization.

SnakeDoc

[HiTech RedNeck]

And some doubtless did not go to either party.

[APFel]

I have acknowledged that there remain questions to be answered about the six non-Constance outcasts.

The article states that the girl arrived with her date and another girl... Which I suppose accounts for two of the seven (and hence the odd number).

APf

[IYAS9YAS]

"It was not the prom I imagined," she said. "It really hurts my feelings. These are still people who I've gone through school with, even teachers who loved me before this all started. I've never been a bad student and I don't feel like I deserve to be put through this."

Dearie, if you can't take the heat, you shouldn't have lit the fire to begin with. You would have been better off to show up with your date at the prom, than announce your intentions and drag the entire school through your little hissy-fit.

Your classmates learned how petty you were, and now, after you caused the loss of their prom, they properly shunned you.

Life's a bitch, deal with it.

[xsmommy]

again you are ASSUMING that the 7 were not invited, and of that you do not have proof.

[PeterPrinciple]

Hate the sin, not the sinner; let he without sin cast the first stone — all of those often misused, universally misunderstood cliches actually apply here

---

Usually agree with you Doc, but what do you do with people who identify themselves as the sin? If you love some one you will tell them the truth, not coddle their feelings. Anyone who truly loved me in my past, set me straight and hurt my feelings in the process.

[kosciusko51]

SnakeDoc,

The school already had tried that with their rules, and she sued the school over it. Do you think she would abide by the rules for a private party?

[HiTech RedNeck]

They TRIED to impose those rules on her. She went to a bleeding liberal judge courtesy of the taxpayer-paid ACLU and whined about not being able to show up in drag with her girl friend. You know what follows.

[SnakeDoctor]

I recall. Thanks. My position stands.

SnakeDoc

[HiTech RedNeck]

Your position falls very much before God.

[SnakeDoctor]

They found that such rules could not be imposed in a school-sponsored party. They can, and should be, imposed for a private party.

SnakeDoc

[xsmommy]

If you and i are both posting 10-15 years from now, i’d like to revisit this with you, once you have experienced a bit more of parenthood and school experiences with your child. I may be wrong, but i am betting your stand will change with time and experience.