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FHP: Driver lacked razor-sharp focus ~ shaving her bikini area while driving
Key West Citizen & Bait Wrapper ^ | ADAM LINHARDT Citizen Staff

Posted on 03/05/2010 5:38:06 AM PST by Elle Bee

As authorities nationwide warn motorists of the dangers of driving while texting, Florida Keys law enforcement officers add a new caution: Don't try to shave your privates, either.

Florida Highway Patrol troopers say a two-vehicle crash Tuesday at Mile Marker 21 on Cudjoe Key was caused by a 37-year-old woman driver who was shaving her bikini area while her ex-husband took the wheel from the passenger seat.

"She said she was meeting her boyfriend in Key West and wanted to be ready for the visit," Trooper Gary Dunick said. "If I wasn't there, I wouldn't have believed it. About 10 years ago I stopped a guy in the exact same spot ... who had three or four syringes sticking out of his arm. It was just surreal and I thought, 'Nothing will ever beat this.' Well, this takes it."

If that weren't enough, Megan Mariah Barnes was not supposed to be driving and her 1995 Ford Thunderbird was not supposed to be on the road.

The day before the wreck, Barnes was convicted in an Upper Keys court of DUI with a prior and driving with a suspended license, said Monroe County Assistant State Attorney Colleen Dunne. Barnes was ordered to impound her car, and her driver's license was revoked for five years, after which time she must have a Breathalyzer ignition interlock device on any vehicle she drives, Dunne said. Barnes also was sentenced to nine months' probation.

Barnes and Charles Judy were southbound in her Thunderbird at 11 a.m. when they slammed into the back of a 2006 Chevrolet pickup driven by David Schoff of Palm Bay. His passengers were a man and two women; the latter were treated for minor injuries at Lower Keys Medical Center, FHP spokesman Alex Annunziato said.

Schoff had slowed to about 5 mph to make a turn when the Thunderbird hit him, traveling about 45 mph, which was within the speed limit, Dunick said.

Barnes allegedly drove another half-mile, then switched seats with Judy, who allegedly claimed to be driving, Annunziato said.

"She jumps in the back seat and he moves over," Dunick said. "It was like the old comedy bit, 'Who's on first?' "

Burns on Judy's chest from the passenger-side airbag deploying belied their story, Dunick said. The airbag in the steering wheel did not deploy, he said.

Troopers charged Barnes with driving with a revoked license, reckless driving, leaving the scene of a wreck with injuries and driving with no insurance. Judy was not charged.

Barnes faces a maximum of a year in jail if found guilty of violating her probation due to the wreck, Dunne said.

"My phone has been ringing off the hook all day, and I know there's a funny side to this, but it's also deadly serious. This is a scary road and a lot of bad wrecks are caused by dumb stuff like this," Dunick said. "It is unbelievable. I'm really starting to believe this stuff only happens in the Keys."

alinhardt@keysnews.com

.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Front Page News; News/Current Events; US: Florida
KEYWORDS: closeshave; floridakeys; napl; texting
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To: RobRoy

Hi Rob! Any good emails lately about the imminent collapse of the US economy? It’s March again!


41 posted on 03/05/2010 6:09:30 AM PST by silverleaf ("Congress is America's only native criminal class."- Mark Twain)
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To: silverleaf
her “ex husband” was driving her to meet her boyfriend?

He'll do anything to get rid of her.

42 posted on 03/05/2010 6:09:31 AM PST by Fido969 ("The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax." - Albert Einstein)
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To: Lazamataz
With a 2x4 maybe.

The other question comes to mind:

Razor.
Scissors.
Weedwacker.

Always use the right tool for the job...

43 posted on 03/05/2010 6:10:39 AM PST by Dead Corpse (III, Oathkeeper)
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To: Dead Corpse

NOTE TO SELF: quite reading this thread ... stomach too weak....


44 posted on 03/05/2010 6:12:11 AM PST by Lurking in Kansas (Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down their level, then beat you with experience.)
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To: Lazamataz

Didn’t see post 26 now, did you...


45 posted on 03/05/2010 6:12:22 AM PST by green iguana
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick
weirdness ping
46 posted on 03/05/2010 6:12:55 AM PST by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: nevergore; fieldmarshaldj

funny


47 posted on 03/05/2010 6:13:57 AM PST by Perdogg ("Is that a bomb in your pants, or are you excited to come to America?")
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To: Sgt_Schultze

“So it’s true what they say about the perils of “deforestation.””

What, that it causes localized “global” warming.


48 posted on 03/05/2010 6:16:32 AM PST by A Strict Constructionist (The Constitution is the issue, other issues are small potatoes. If we fail none will matter.)
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To: Elle Bee
I guess it's a good thing she wasn't going for the Brazilian wax....
49 posted on 03/05/2010 6:17:22 AM PST by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: silverleaf

>>Hi Rob! Any good emails lately about the imminent collapse of the US economy? It’s March again!<<

More than I can count. I am more convinced than ever that it is coming, but people just continue to spout - and believe - more and more outrageous lies and statements. Eventually, though, it will come down hard and fast.

We seem to keep taking bad news in stride without realizing things will have consequences. I am reminded of the Frank Sinatra character in the movie Hole in the Head. He is looking at losing his hotel and during the entire movie he is driving a nice Cadillac convertible, dating a swell chick and only in the background is he sweating bullets trying everything he can to come up with the cash.

It is only in the very last day that he sells his Caddy, puts the money on a horse race, wins big, but then on the next race loses it all. The next morning they foreclose and he is LITERALLY out on the street.

We are in the same boat. The world governments are putting up all the front they can, but the day is coming when they will sell the Caddy. And it will be too little, too late.

I have likened this to a hyperbolic curve. I thought we were started up the near vertical leg last year. It is looking like I was a bit early. The longer it takes for this to finally come down though, the harder we will crash, I believe.

IOW, I feel even more strongly than before, but I believe I was premature by a year or so.


50 posted on 03/05/2010 6:18:12 AM PST by RobRoy (The US today: Revelation 18:4)
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To: martin_fierro

Ping a ling


51 posted on 03/05/2010 6:19:39 AM PST by LesbianThespianGymnasticMidget (God punishes Conservatives by making them argue with fools.)
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To: The_Victor; nevergore

I am sure they make a lady Remington


52 posted on 03/05/2010 6:20:33 AM PST by Perdogg ("Is that a bomb in your pants, or are you excited to come to America?")
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To: from occupied ga
Arrested 13th Dec 2009 at 01:13am

Arrested 2nd Mar 2010 at 11:00am .

Occupation: DISABLED

53 posted on 03/05/2010 6:23:47 AM PST by maggief
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To: Perdogg
I am sure they make a lady Remington

But I'm not convinced that the perp is eligible to use that.

54 posted on 03/05/2010 6:24:13 AM PST by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: Elle Bee

Bwahahahahahahaha


55 posted on 03/05/2010 6:25:13 AM PST by steve8714 (If Lindsay Graham is a conservative, I am not..)
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To: green iguana
That's the reason I'd hit it.

She's hot.

56 posted on 03/05/2010 6:25:32 AM PST by Lazamataz (Seriously. The only way Obama can possibly pull this out is to declare Martial Law before November.)
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To: from occupied ga

She has a face that could stop a Thunderbird going 45 mph.


57 posted on 03/05/2010 6:26:15 AM PST by Disambiguator
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To: panaxanax

The quicker she gets remarried, the quicker he can stop paying alimony.


58 posted on 03/05/2010 6:29:16 AM PST by wolfpat (Moderate=Clueless)
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To: maggief

She has time to shave her privates, but in over 2 months still can’t tend to her roots??
We all have our priorities...


59 posted on 03/05/2010 6:30:36 AM PST by GnuHere
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To: maggief; Lazamataz

You might be a redneck if you use the web DUI booking photos as an online dating service.


60 posted on 03/05/2010 6:31:37 AM PST by from occupied ga (Your most dangerous enemy is your own government,)
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