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It can't possibly happen here--or can it?
Aberdeen American News ^ | August 30, 2009 | Donna Marmorstein

Posted on 08/30/2009 5:57:15 PM PDT by ancientart

Examiner: How are you feeling today, Kelly?

Kelly: Fine. Great!

Examiner: Your cholesterol levels are elevated again.

Kelly: Yeah.

Examiner: And your blood pressure's still high.

Kelly: Probably because I rushed. Didn't want to have to pay the 50 bucks. I used to get 50 bucks for signing up. Now I have to pay if I don't sign up.

Examiner: But it's all voluntary. Remember that. OK. Your blood glucose levels are fine, but your waist measurement is borderline.

Kelly: I started walking more.

Examiner: Your risk for stroke and heart disease is high. I see, though, that you've agreed to the exit exams.

Kelly: Yeah, my employers profit if I sign up - so they give me a discount health club membership.

Examiner: Fine, fine. Now, I've examined your chart and, frankly, I see risks ahead. Kelly, have you thought about the end of your life?

Kelly: Not really. I'm only 55!

Examiner: Looking at your lab results, I think you should consider this: You'll likely experience years recovering from bypass surgery; strokes could make you unable to move or speak. You could languish in a wheelchair for years.

Kelly: I did stop smoking.

Examiner: Yes. That was good. But you have cancer in your family history. You could see repeated surgeries, chemo treatments, reduced immune function, sensitivity to diseases.

Kelly: Yet I could live to a ripe old age.

Examiner: I want you to think for a moment of what it might be like after suffering a stroke. You can't move the right side of your body. Your speech is slurred. You need help feeding yourself, and you can't drive. What would life be like?

Kelly: Hard.

Examiner: Yes. Not just hard for you, but hard for your family, your friends. Think of all the people you'd inconvenience.

Kelly: I took care of my mother and made her last years comfortable.

Examiner: But you wouldn't wish those hard years on those you love, would you?

Kelly: (silence)

Examiner: I have here a form. It's a simple form. All it says is that if you suffer from a debilitating illness, the doctors take measures so you don't spend much time in pain.

Kelly: That sounds OK. How, exactly, will that work?

Examiner: Well, if you get really sick, instead of costly and agonizing treatments, we just allow - that is, you, allow - extraordinary measures to be withheld. Totally voluntary.

Kelly: And extraordinary measures means -

Examiner: Expensive surgeries, procedures, feeding tubes, respirators, hydration, costly drugs, tubes - those kinds of things. All voluntary.

Kelly: Voluntary now? Or voluntary later?

Examiner: Oh, now, of course. You can either sign this form or not sign it. Totally voluntary.

Kelly: If I sign it now, can I change my mind later?

Examiner: (smiling) Let's see how to put this. Let's say you're in an accident. You've suffered a concussion, and many bodily functions are gone. You've previously signed the form. But something goes haywire with your mind and you keep calling out to nurses that you want to live. You don't really want to live. The concussion has put you in a state of - confusion. This form eliminates the hassle and all the agony of that situation. We will see to your earlier, voluntary wishes. It's that simple.

Kelly: Who decides what's a debilitating illness?

Examiner: We have professionals who can weigh costs and benefits. You don't ever need to worry. We do all the deciding for you.

Kelly: Sounds easy.

Examiner: Oh, it's easy. If you sign, you get an extra $50 credit.

Kelly: Hey! What can I lose?


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Government; Philosophy; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: deathpanels; euthanasia

1 posted on 08/30/2009 5:57:15 PM PDT by ancientart
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To: ancientart
Just wait until the bastards gain the ability to conduct genetic testing a la GATTACA. You ain't seen nothin' yet!
2 posted on 08/30/2009 6:01:11 PM PDT by rabscuttle385 (May God save the American Republic.)
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To: ancientart

Bet on it!

The death culture owns the MSM.


3 posted on 08/30/2009 6:02:41 PM PDT by editor-surveyor (The beginning of the O'Bummer administration looks a lot like the end of the Nixon administration)
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To: ancientart

I’ve seen a lot of stupid things said in the health care debate, but this ranks up there with the stupidest.


4 posted on 08/30/2009 6:13:39 PM PDT by ConservativeInMaine
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To: ConservativeInMaine

After perusing your posting history, I’ve come to the conclusion you’ve either chosen your name poorly or under false pretenses.

In short, a troll


5 posted on 08/30/2009 6:20:00 PM PDT by Balding_Eagle (If America falls, darkness will cover the face of the earth for a thousand years.)
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To: ancientart

Just wait until this is not voluntary! The death panels will make sure of that.


6 posted on 08/30/2009 6:20:00 PM PDT by rawhide
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To: ConservativeInMaine

Get a patient who is suffering a touch of senility, and see how funny the conversation sounds!


7 posted on 08/30/2009 6:20:59 PM PDT by HiTech RedNeck (Barack Obama is a political suicide bomber and the Rats are political arsonists.)
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To: ConservativeInMaine

Your lack of imagination is stunning. There is nothing stupid about the scenario, nor even implausible. This is a logical extension of our current technology coupled with the unintended consequences of obamacare.

Read a book or something!


8 posted on 08/30/2009 7:34:21 PM PDT by rockrr (Everything is different now...)
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To: ConservativeInMaine

This post is exactly what could happen.


9 posted on 08/30/2009 7:53:05 PM PDT by DJ MacWoW (Make yourselves sheep and the wolves will eat you. Ben Franklin)
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To: ancientart

This reads like a VA publication.


10 posted on 08/31/2009 5:37:35 AM PDT by csmusaret (If you like this economy, keep voting for Donkeys.)
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To: Balding_Eagle

You are correct.

He got the zot here: http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2328524/posts - Comment #17 Removed by Moderator


11 posted on 08/31/2009 8:17:50 AM PDT by rockrr (Everything is different now...)
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To: ancientart

Kelly: If I do sign it and I become a burden on society, is there anything I can do to keep someone from administering a lethal dose of drugs just to get rid of me?

Examiner: Well, you can murder someone and get on death row.


12 posted on 08/31/2009 8:26:04 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If you aren't part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem.)
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