Tribune Co. Hires Bizarre Radio Consultant to 'Improver' Circulation Via 'Soul'

NewsBusters ^ | March 15, 2008 | P.J. Gladnick

[PJ-Comix]

Imagine if a comedy script is submitted to a movie producer. It would be about a major newspaper conglomerate so desperate to turn around the plunging circulation numbers of its various newspapers that it hires a wacky radio consultant as a Chief Innovation Officer to help turn it around. The radio consultant is so strange that he believes the way to improve the circulation numbers is to ensure that the newspapers have soul. He plans to do this by treating newspapers as the new rock 'n' roll.  The wacky Chief Innovation Officer announces his plans in a seemingly endless  e-mail message that wanders aimlessly for 5 web pages in which claims that newspapers need to "morph the soul of Dylan...with with the innovation of Apple and the eccentric-all-the-way-to-the-bank of Bill Veeck." The message also conjures up "theater of the mind," Star Wars, plus a whole host of nearly indecipherable psycho-babble that includes visions of open and closed modes. To give extra "meaning" to the interminable message, the Chief Innovation Officer laces it with page after page of quotations from sources as diverse as John Cleese to  Machiavelli to Carl Jung to Arthur Koestler and many, many others.

Of course, the idea of a rock'n'roll psychobabble nutcase being such a responsible position at a major newspaper conglomerate would be rejected by the movie producer as too improbable even for comedy. However, in reality this has actually happened. The Tribune Co. which owns such newspapers as the Chicago Tribune, Los Angeles Times, and my hometown Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel has hired radio consultant Lee Abrams (photo) as its Chief Innovation Officer in a desperate bid to turn their plunging circulation figures around. To get an idea of Abrams really strange (and rambling) mindset take a look at just the first page of his overlong e-mail in all its psychedelic glory announcing his new position at the Tribune Company:

Please forgive this rambling introduction letter, but I am ecstatic with no-bullsh*t excitement and pride in joining The Tribune Company.

While my background is in steeped in "Rock n Roll", I strongly believe that News and Information is the NEW Rock n Roll. Imagine it's 1952. Music has existed for centuries and part of the fabric of our culture. While music was a hotbed of activity in the Black community, in mainstream America we were in a blasé era of Mitch Miller and Patty Page. Then-Rock n Roll! It had a street level connection to the Post War American Spirit. Tapped into the pulse of the American way of thinking. It was based on: imagination, looking FORWARD, respecting but not praying to the musical playbook, moved fast...met the rhythm of America, worked at innovating-it was a mission to come up with the next cool thing, revolutionized the 'look' of people, etc... Now fast forward to 2008, News and Information has been around since the dawn of Man, but it's a lot like where music was in 1952: Poised for a dynamic breakthrough that re-invest the media. The NEW Rock n Roll isn't about Elvis or James Dean, but it IS about re-inventing media with the exact same moxie that the fathers of Rock n Roll had. The Tribune has the choice of doing to News/Information/Entertainment what Rock n Roll did to music...to be the Ray Charles, Dylan's, Beatles and U2's of the Information age...or have someone else figure it out, or worse, let these American institutions disappear into irrelevancy. I think Rock n Roll is the best choice. America needs a heartbeat, and we can deliver that on 21st Century terms. Rock n Roll musically is behind us. NEWS & INFORMATION IS THE NEW ROCK N ROLL

One thing that drives me nuts is Pop Culture's evil cousin that I call Junk Culture. Terrorists don't scare me...a dumb America is frightening. On a very personal level, it is important to me that I help Tribune fight 'junk culture'. Smart re-invention that enlightens. Websites can be Disneyland for the mind; TV stations (especially news) can put the Kent Brockman cliché to rest and create a visual experience that intoxicates with brilliance and freshness; And Newspapers! We owe it to our culture to make sure they thrive...We can make America smarter. Not more elite...just smarter.

I realize I have a history in radio, but that's behind me, nonetheless there's a great radio analogy. In 1954 Radio was proclaimed dead. In fact, you can take stories from back then about radio's death and substitute the word newspaper and you have 99% of the articles written today suggesting Newspapers impending death. Well, a couple of guys threw out the Arthur Godfrey playbook invented Top 40 Radio. Guess what. Radio went into a NEW golden age...bigger than ever...the soundtrack of the streets. TV? It got bigger and bigger. My point: Yes, the Internet is huge competition, but there's NO reason we can't create the equivalent of Top 40...Not a hyper teen thing. But something that has the same dramatic impact across all demographics and lifestyles. It's doable.

Soul. I hope I can bring that out in us. Soul is something that big companies rarely have. And having it not only improvers the spirit, but it's a competitive advantage. Most media companies are soul-less. If we have Soul, we have a dramatic intangible advantage. Historically, the great companies had Soul. In the modern era, they do not. You know the ones that do. Those companies have FANS not just users.

Art. How unfashionable in today's bottom line World. But we need to be artists. Media Artists. A great artist delivers something that lasts and touches people. If we approach EVERYTHING from mail delivery in the building to breaking stories with an artist Point of View, we will create lasting change. Artists create Quality. Quality lasts. Art enriches lives. We can/will re-define the art of brilliant media.

The economics. I am an economic dunce. My old company would give me free vacation days during budget season so I'd stay out of the process. I know the "buzz" is cutbacks, fear, paranoia etc...Hey---that's part of the reality for survival. But I hope to encourage revenue growth in a different way. Simply put-If Tribune properties turn users into fans and we make intelligent moves to significantly (and dramatically) increase circulation and viewership, the revenue WILL skyrocket. That I know.

Wow! Tremendous insight there, Lee. Increased circulation and viewership means more revenue. Who would have thought of that? Perhaps you're not such an economic dunce after all.

Even stranger than Abrams' very weird e-mail is his blog which is so off-the-wall as to make Bob Norman of the New Times Daily Pulp to wonder aloud if the new Chief Innovation Officer of the Tribune Co. is clinically insane. Among the great entertainment provided on Abram's blog is his hilarious psychobabble comedy act performed in this video. I really liked the part about the base player ODing.

Of course, I am unable to come up with a better insight than Lee Abram's observation that increased circulation leads to more newspaper revenue but I do have a couple of solid suggestions for the Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel. First you might want to consider ditching the incredibly boring "Blob." Secondly get rid of the equally dull Dueling Columnists or, as I call them, "Dulling Columnists." Could you get excited about Errol Flynn and Basil Rathbone dueling each other with swords in separate rooms? Of course not. But that is exacty the concept behind the "Dueling" Columnists. Two columnists writing separate columns on the same topic. Just the same excitement generated there as dueling with swords in seperate rooms. If Lee Abrams is serious about improving the ridiculous Dueling Columnists he would ditch the separate column idea and have a video dueling debate between liberal Stephen Goldstein and conserative radio talk show host, Steve Kane. This idea is something that might cause Sun-Sentinel editor, Earl Maucker to have a fit but I think most of the rest of us would enjoy such a real duel.

Oh, and in your next e-mail, Lee, you might consider including a quote from the Bard himself. You know, the one that says, "Brevity is the soul of wit." 

h/t: Bob Norman of New Times.

[PJ-Comix]

File this in the Stranger Than Fiction Comedy Department.

[1rudeboy]

Anybody ever read Who moved my Blackberry™?, by Lucy Kellaway? A facsimile of it used to appear in the Financial Times on Thursdays. I bought my copy through Amazon UK before the dollar tanked (and it was still pricey), but one might be able to find it online used.

I recommend it . . . if you are into managerial email babblespeak, but all means get the book. It's hilarious.

[1rudeboy]

Actually, the correct title is: Martin Lukes: Who Moved My Blackberry™?

[Crawdad]

Beware those who use the word “moxie”.

[PJ-Comix]

Sun-Sentinel FYI.

[Clemenza]

I actually toured the Slum Sentinel’s printing press once.

[hometoroost]

He's too over the top for me but he makes some good points:

1. If papers keep doing what they are doing they will lose.

2. They do need to work on what appeals to readers and not the pump the same dribble.

3. If readership isn't interested you won't sell papers and if you don't sell papers you will go broke (it sounds simple and it is but it's the simple things that kill companies)

He is wrong about at least one thing though - he calls it "today's Bottom Line World." I hate to tell you Lee but it's always been a bottom-line world. Even as an animal if you don't eat at least as many calories as you consume eventually you're history.

[lowbridge]

The Tribune Co. which owns such newspapers as the Chicago Tribune, Los Angeles Times, and my hometown Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel has hired radio consultant Lee Abrams (photo) as its Chief Innovation Officer in a desperate bid to turn their plunging circulation figures around.

I guess they'd rather sink their ship than replace all their liberals with conservatives.

[Alright_on_the_LeftCoast]

Just another reason to NEVER buy ANYTHING published by the Tribune....POS!!!

[Chode]

tell the truth, problem solved... that will be $500,000.

[IronJack]

Maybe they could hire a witch doctor to shake some magic chicken bones over the copy desk. Or, since it IS the Ides of March, they could retain a soothsayer — some battered old crone to accost their publisher in the street on his way to the Forum ...

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

Useful keywords to remedy circulation problems.

http://www.freerepublic.com/tag/biasmeanslayoffs/

http://www.freerepublic.com/tag/trysellingthetruth/

http://www.freerepublic.com/tag/Geritol/

.

.

.

.

Yes, KIDDING on the last one....

[yefragetuwrabrumuy]

There are several things newspapers need to do to get back their readers.

The #1 thing is to become local again. Their primary news is not international or national, but local. This is because they are the best equipped to get, consolidate, and present local news. Nobody else can do that as well. Their reporters need to be local people, who have great familiarity with the place and its people. Weirdly enough, there is no “local newspaper” in New York City.

#2 is to strictly limit the use of the “pyramid” style of writing. The vast majority of news can be in bullet format with a one or two sentence follow-up at much higher density. Hundreds of news items instead of dozens.

#3 the Internet is the primary source of international news, not the wire services, which are arcane and corrupt. New free Internet organizations replace them with information from around the world. Sources are rated for accuracy, reliability, and interest. 10000 journalists around the world could “feed” news to each other direct from the source, complete with blog-style criticism and questions from other journalists to keep them honest.

#4 the more the local public is involved in creating the paper, the more people will read the paper. It is not ridiculous that reporters should be assigned neighborhoods to canvass, knocking on doors to identify himself as “their” reporter, and giving them his card with phone number to call and leave a voice message.

#5 many of the old newspaper beats that have gone by the wayside need to be brought back. A once a week crime section is tricky, but popular. Local political debates can fill a lot of inches, every now and then. A metro area has a huge number of events year around, and a reporter should be at them, as well as performances, sports events, etc.

#6 again keeping it local, newspapers should have reporters visit and talk business to high school papers until those students know them personally and feel just as free to visit the newspaper offices. Local internships can pay huge dividends.

#7 the same with local businesses and colleges. Innovations and breakthroughs should be published locally. It starts as almost free advertising, but it binds the community around its newspaper. How many celebrities, inventors, local artists and scientists live just a few miles away but have a major impact? A newspaper lets you know.

But all of this can only happen when the big newspaper conglomerates are broken up, *and* the college schools of journalism finally accept that the old way of doing business is defunct.

These are just a few ideas, and no doubt there are many more. But they can no longer insist that they way they do things is the *only* way to do things.

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

Some good suggestions, yefrag. Would appreciate any further ones.

Ping to a couple others who will also be interested and might help me move ahead on a project soon.

[yefragetuwrabrumuy]

I would only propose such things to non-media types.

In past, I have been amazed at the obstinate, almost religious, resistance to change in the media.

Even couching such things in “not just my suggestions, but any suggestions for change” terms, the response is somewhat like their putting their fingers in their ears and yelling “La La La La La I Can’t Hear You! La! La! La! La!”

Then they rant that there is, and there can be, NO change to how they do things. It must be done, it can ONLY be done, the way it is done.

This is how it is taught in journalism schools in college campuses across the country. How can you help people like that?

I think that suggesting it to them is fruitless. They must be convinced by someone outside of their fraternity, using a new model independent of their philosophy, and succeeding where they fail.

Many will prefer to go down with their ship. Only a few years ago, I saw a televised round table of bitter journalists damning the public for not buying their now defunct newspaper in New York. One after another, they insisted that the important news was only to be found at elite cocktail parties hosted by the intelligentsia in trendy penthouses.

Oh, how they railed against the hoi polloi, the vast majority of their readers, who did not appreciate their elitist cultural snobbery and hand crafted opinion pieces that singularly condemned the oafishness of the commoners—their readers.

People like that need a harsh lesson, for others to succeed where they fail. Did you see the bitterness and bile they directed towards Matt Drudge, just a few years ago? To them, he was truly a heretic, and one to be destroyed at all cost.

Yet today, even in the same publication, the online group is usually ignored and despised by the print group, who seek to undermine it in some way.

The bottom line is that economic Darwinism will win out. Those who are not so brittle in their media philosophy will create a new paradigm, that will run circles around the old one. The old philosophy will wither and die, taking the obstinate with it. And when journalism majors can no longer get jobs in their field, even the journalism schools will have to adapt.