Posted on 11/19/2007 5:24:41 PM PST by Vigilanteman
Mommy must live in Seattle or King County.
“Mommy must live in Seattle or King County.”
Or in St. Louis, Chicago (or Cook County) Detroit (and Wayne County), Philadelphia, or *anywhere* in Louisiana.
Did I miss any? Probably.
Mommy Dearest...
By taking them from you without your permission, and giving them to lazy, ungrateful children you don't know, who won't want to spend any of their allowance on things they are given for free. This will teach you the valuable lesson that you shouldn't work very hard, because those more powerful than you will simply use their position to manipulate you and make you feel helpless, and use your efforts to reward the incompetent. This will prepare you for the brief periods when the Democrats are in office.
Democrats make sure we are always safe, just like mommy does.
The way Mommy does this is by telling you that you should be nice to the school bully who beats the crap out of you, because it is probably your fault for acting like you are really important and having more toys than they do. Mommy says that it isn't nice to hit back, and if you really want to impress the bully, you should write up stern warnings that have absolutely no real threat behind them, and do it about eighteen times before you even think about doing something. And if you do anything, you should get a lawyer and take the case to court, letting it drag on for years, during which the bully will have ample time to keep beating you.
Daddy is a Republican. He says that the first time the SOB crosses you, you kick him in the 'nards, sit on his chest when he curls up, and beat his face until he gets the idea that you won't take any cr@p from a little dirtbag like him. And by the way, son, if he picks on little kids smaller than you, you should do the exact same thing long before he gets to picking on you.
Democrats make sure children can go to school, just like mommy does.
Mommy's idea of giving children an education involves "behavior management" and "positive self-esteem revitalization" ensuring that even if children have no damn worthwhile skills at all, and can't speak clear English, can't write a coherent essay of a thousand words, and can't construct a logical argument that doesn't involve the phrase "Republican meanies", at least they will feel real good about themselves. If Mommy could, she would take all the A's you have worked so hard to earn, cut them in half, and give the spare grade points to kids with F's so that they would have C's and we could all be happily the same.
Love the circled SUV’s!
5) Mommy has several incurable STDs ... and guess what? She passed them on to you! Just like the Democrats ...
Skit from In Living Color. TV Comedy.
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