Posted on 10/31/2007 11:58:37 AM PDT by tuffydoodle
Somebody should tell teenage girls that a high school homecoming is no place for a Carmen Electra lap dance.
And by somebody, I don't mean the stodgy Argyle school superintendent.
High school girls themselves should tell one another to turn around. Stop grinding. Make the boys look up.
Parents should demand it.
If you think I'm just old and out of touch with teenagers -- ask a counselor.
In all the reams of news coverage about Argyle High School's crackdown on "dirty dancing" and its homecoming-night cleavage ban, I have yet to see anyone ask a counselor whether rumped-up dancing is psychologically healthy for girls.
So I asked.
"This is all about wanting to be noticed, and boys definitely notice," said Carolyn Kern, a University of North Texas associate professor and director of the school's successful Counseling and Human Development Center.
"But provocative dancing isn't going to get these girls what they really want. They get attention. But they want an emotional connection."
That doesn't happen with your backside turned.
The flap about Argyle's homecoming dance has now stretched across three weeks.
New Superintendent Jason Ceyanes, 34, a straight-arrow type from an ultraconservative Houston suburb, has apologized for a surprise dance-night crackdown against spaghetti-strap dresses and plunging necklines.
But he still says he might "bring in dance instructors" to teach students other dances -- perhaps the foxtrot.
After two public meetings -- including a special trustees' meeting Monday -- school officials now promise to let parents help revise the dress code by Nov. 9. In other words, school officials are listening.
But some parents, and even one local newspaper, also seem to think Argyle officials should quit worrying about the "freak dancing" or "dirty dancing" that was interrupted at the homecoming dance.
In an editorial, the Denton Record-Chronicle wrote that schoolteachers shouldn't have to worry about whether teenagers "shake too much booty" and generally made it sound as if adults were wasting their time policing dances.
Look, I don't think Ceyanes' idea will work. I don't think teenagers want to learn the waltz. (Maybe the cha-cha.)
But I also don't think parents and school officials can just let every school dance turn into tuxed-up Greco-Roman wrestling.
And if some parents think low, hip-grinding dances are OK for high school seniors, then what age is too young?
Sophomores? Middle school? The Little Miss Argyle pageant?
The Argyle dispute "is a picture of what's going on today in society," Kern said.
"We're struggling to define what's OK for young people and at what age," she said. "A lot of research says that adolescents aren't emotionally ready to be sexually active, from a psychological perspective. But here they are, and we're left struggling over where to set boundaries."
What's fun -- and what's hurtful?
Unlike some national experts, Kern didn't go so far as to say that suggestive dancing is particularly demeaning to women or that it reduces teenage girls to faceless, twistable toys for boys.
But she did say that girls risk more.
"They don't realize that they're sending the message, 'This is what I want.' They might have to explain later that it's not what they want. That explanation might not be easy."
Argyle school board President Debbie Cantrell, a doctor, has defended students. They're not "dirty," she said, and she wishes we wouldn't describe the dances that way.
"We have some very good, intelligent young adults who stood up at our meetings and said, 'We don't know any other way to dance,'" she said.
All they have to do is turn around.
Still, no. Sorry. I really question the quality of instruction of anyone who would give a blackbelt to a seven year old.
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On the other claw, there's much to be said for teaching kids to shooting, archery, hand-to-hand fighting, whatever, when they're young. They grow up with it, when they're adults they don't forget.
What about a teenaged daughter? Got one yet? Would it be ok for her?
four of my five kids are black belts in tae kwon do. the youngest at age eight is a green belt.
Thank you for the advice Pistolshot. I’ll need some practice listening and not dictating . . .
Great thing for a family to do together. Lots of benefits.
“You should take your daughter out on “dates” - just the two of you. Show her how a gentleman treats a young lady. For example, open doors (car doors even), etc. Teach her to simply wait for the man to open the doors for her by failing to do so once in a while and telling her how to respond.”
What, and undo all the fabulous improvements radical feminism has wrought in our society over the last 30 years?
Homeschoolers in our area have the opportunity to learn ballroom dancing and many take advantage of it. Young men and young ladies alike are LOVING it.
Last year, they gave an impromptu exhibition at the National Fair in Perry, GA and it was lovely.
I wouldn’t put my kids in publik government kiddie prisons for ANYTHING.
Unfortunately, this week on Dancing with the Stars, Edyta was, briefly, grinding on that Cameron guy’s crotch.
“You should take your daughter out on “dates” - just the two of you. Show her how a gentleman treats a young lady. For example, open doors (car doors even), etc. Teach her to simply wait for the man to open the doors for her by failing to do so once in a while and telling her how to respond.”
What, and undo all the fabulous improvements radical feminism has wrought in our society over the last 30 years?
From Valuable by British poet Stevie Smith.
I’d think public genital rubbing pretty much defines a skank.
Really, I believe that a lot of the girls don’t know how to dance. I don’t, but that doesn’t mean they should be rubbing their bottoms up against a guys genitals. Sometimes two girls will do it, and judging by the acceptance of homosexuality, two guys probably do it too. (barf) However, it’s not entirely the kids’ fault. Their parents are ok with them dressing sleazy and dancing that way, the school is telling the kids it’s ok to sleep around (even providing the birth control), and the music and media pushes sex at every turn. Girls don’t realize that it is turning them into sexual objects. That’s what these guys see them as. I would love to see a change in our culture, a return to modesty and decency.
It’s not that I did it that makes it ok, it’s that there will always be forms of dancing that older society disapproves of.
As long as at the end of the night she isn’t in the back seat of somebody’s car, any daughter I have can dance basically how she wants. No nakedness and no sex afterwards.
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