Posted on 08/20/2007 7:41:24 AM PDT by Between the Lines
OPINION, August 20 /Christian Newswire/ -- "Do you know the fine for using someone else's handicapped parking permit is $300?" "That parking spot is saved for the disabled! You should be ashamed of yourself!" Nearly everyone with an invisible illness has been told, "You don't look disabled to me!" One of my friends replied, "Well, you don't look stupid to me." I just bite my lip to try to prevent the tears from forming, broken-hearted that I appear to be deceptive, when I would do anything to give back this parking perk that I use on a rare occasion.
As I circle the parking lot a fourth time on this day I hope for a spot to open up within two-hundred yards of the store, but there is nothing remotely close at this bustling superstore where I need to buy my prescriptions and milk for my toddler. My rheumatoid arthritis is flaring badly, causing extra fluid in my knees to dislocate pieces of loose bones. Every step is painful and unpredictable.
Finally I sigh in resignation and pull into the farthest "blue parking spot." I reach for the placard--the one that has a bold white symbol of a wheelchair--and no, I don't have a wheelchair--yet. So after fifteen years of having this "privilege" at my disposal I still warily scan the area before reluctantly dangling the placard from the rear view mirror. Is there anyone watching, wondering, or waiting, ready to confront me?
I've had scathing notes left on my windshield and many people, empowered by television exposés, have approached me with their opinions. Judgmental expressions and whispers sting just as much. My husband and I adopted a baby and when I would get my child of the car I would avoid eye contact with onlookers because I could hear their whispers of, "She's not disabled! Or--if she is--she has no right to have a child!"
Nearly 1 in 2 Americans (133 million) live with a chronic illness. It could be diabetes, cancer, cystic fibrosis, fibromyalgia or even chronic back pain. Many illnesses make walking long distances impossible because of limited lung capacity, physical pain, or unpredictable numbness in the legs. According to statistics provided by the U.S. Census Bureau, about 96% of these illnesses are invisible. There is no sign of the illness existing, nor the use of an assistive device like a cane or a wheelchair.
I began National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week in 2002, which is held this year Sept 10-16, 2007, after witnessing thousands of people who had frustrations, fears, loneliness, and bitterness, about feeling invalidated. One's illness, age, diagnosis, or level of disease degeneration, doesn't change the emotional pain.
Strangers and loved ones alike doubt the severity of our illness or even the diagnosis. We've heard, "You look so good! You must be feeling better." But we don't feel better. We just bought some fake tan in a bottle and pasted on a smile.
National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week is a time to acknowledge that invisible illness is more prevalent than we'd imagine and everyone--both those who are healthy and ill--can make a difference by encouraging someone with an invisible illness, rather than tearing someone down.
Are those parking spots painted blue because they give so many people the blues? That small area of square footage is a breeding ground for many frustrations as we are forced to defend our illness and character to total strangers. I'd gladly trade in my placard indefinitely for just a week of having my old body back when I could run, sit on the floor, or even hold a fork without tendons popping out of place.
I anticipate the day when a nationally designated system is formed. Texas law states that blue placards are for those who use assistive devices; red permits are for people with a "condition that impairs mobility." In other states, red symbolizes six months of disability and blue is permanent. It's confusing! And for one with invisible illness, the wheelchair symbol discredits both our physical pain and--in the eyes of others--our reputation. Until then, we rely on Invisible Illness Week bumper stickers.
The next time you see a healthy looking man loading groceries into his car--parked in the "blue spot"--don't glare. Stop and offer to help him, or just smile nicely, giving him the benefit of the doubt. Seventy percent of suicides have uncontrollable physical pain as a factor. Your smile may save his life. At the least, it will astonish him, perhaps providing him with genuine encouragement he hasn't felt for months.
Exactly. I lost all respect for the system after the nth time I saw someone zip into a handicapped spot, put up the tag, jump out of the car and run into the mall. It's infuriating.
“Seventy percent of suicides have uncontrollable physical pain as a factor.”
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Where does she get this figure. That’s truly awful if true and should be flogged as often as possible when the issue of pain control and painkiller prescription is brought up.
Damn those rednecks for giving Oxycontin a bad name.
Seems to me a bunch of Americans just need to mind their own dang business.
I don’t give a crap who parks in the blue spots, I don’t care if they “deserve” to or not.
Why are there so many busy bodies in our country?
I think it’s because we mistakenly classified pimp slapping stupid people as assault, JMO.
if you see someone abuse the handicapped parking laws, you shouuld report them to the police, or at least the DMV.
You’d be doing a favor for those of us who need the spaces.
I smile eerily, as if to an invisible presence over the questioner’s shoulder, and say, in a singsong robotic voice, “I’m psychotic, little angel, would you like to go back to heaven with me?” This generally backs them up.
What would we print on mine?
I all to often get that look of “You are stealing a handicapped person place and you look healthy to me” The symptoms of advanced emphysema and COPD are hard to spot from a distance and I only use the , what I call the “Cripple Tag” on a bad day. Walking is no problem but the distance is the problem
What really irks me is when I need a spot and have the license plates for them and they are all full than I see two football players running to a car with the tag hanging on the mirror and getting in and running back to the store.
Than you look at the next car and it has no handicapped symbol of any sort but the engine is running and the guy is reading the newspaper. It has now become a standing zone.
In Houston we have a program where individual citizens can write a ticket and take em to court. You have to go to classes, learn the way to do it and start out the right way.
You have to remember one thing. Write the ticket in full befor you take the mandatory photo. If you try the picture first you get people driving off as fast as they can
Of which the automobile has become a major contributor. How very perceptive. Thanks for pointing out that irony.
Or we get the AMA and the APA to list Chronic Jealousy Disorder as a legitimate illness and issue everyone a blue placard.
No one should get a handicapped sticker unless they are in a wheelchair. Better yet, since the “handi-capable” demand to be treated like everyone else, eliminate handicapped parking altogether.
did you see the pain shooting up that person's spine? Were they runnign becauseeach step hurt adn they wanted to get in as quickly as possible? Were they running because someone they care about was inside in need of help? or are you simply playing into stereotypes?
Amen.
I recently counted 12 in a nearby Home Depot parking lot: how many people in wheelchairs have you ever seen pushing sheets of drywall out to their cars? Sheesh ...
To the author:
Quit your damned whining and park in the closest spot to the door. Your real handicap is self-pity and lack of spine.
Hee hee...
I once said something very similar to someone once who commented on my placard.
I've got pretty bad scoliosis, and as a result once in a while my back bothers me something severely (usually on Monday mornings after I've spent the weekend doing yardwork).
I hardly ever actually use my handicap parking privileges, only when I'm in such bad pain that walking is almost impossible. One time, I used it at the mall a week or so before Christmas. I'll admit, I wasn't hurting all that much at that point, but I knew after two hours or so of walking around the mall I'd need a quick exit to the car after the shopping was done.
As I got out of the car, a lady comes up to me and my wife (she was with me) and said,
"Hey, you can't park there...you don't look disabled."
To which I politely replied,
"Well, you don't really look all that ignorant to me, but I guess looks can be deceiving, eh?"
And then I continued on my way.
There are many more things than drywall for sale at the Home Despot ... and some of them are purchased by handicapped folks, for later installation by healthy relatives and friends.
Yes, handicapped folks can have relatives and friends.
I sympathize. My late boyfriend had Parkinson’s. He looked hale and hearty, but it was very difficult for him to walk. He got lots of nasty looks. (Since he had the ruddy complexion, tendency to perspire and awkward gait that often go with Parkinsonism, he was sometimes taken for a drunk.) People need to be a little more tolerant — don’t assume you can judge by first appearances.
“My wife has JLS when she sleeps. Can she get a sticker?”
Jimmy Legs Syndrome?
Trainer: Pick up those weights.
Laz: Hell no! Then I'll be heavier! My goal is to LOSE weight.
Trainer: LOL! WTF??!? OMG! STFU! IMHO, FOAD! LOL!
“did you see the pain shooting up that person’s spine? Were they runnign becauseeach step hurt adn they wanted to get in as quickly as possible? Were they running because someone they care about was inside in need of help? or are you simply playing into stereotypes?”
Um... No?
What do I win?
ever think that they were getting something for somebody else? on more than one occasion I was with friends when one of htem had an insulin attack. If the usual candy bar didn't sstop the reaction, I would send somebody to the car to get another one. In these cases these 'normal' persons would run to the car, grab the item requested, then hotfoot it back to us.
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