[VeniVidiVici]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!”

[Ancesthntr]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!”

It'll probably be a disqualifying crime to lie on a doctor's questionairre - so just leave it blank. If the doc brings up the question, just ask if he's familiar with the concept of a "boundary violation." Simultaneously asking for the name of his malpractice insurance company would help.

Alternatively, respond by asking the doc how much he/she makes, and what his/her net worth is. When you get the "That's none of your business!" answer, just smile.

[LibWhacker]

Catch 22... If you lie and they find out, the doctor will declare you paranoid and therefore unfit to own a gun. OTOH, if you don’t lie , they’ll ask you a series of loaded questions that necessarily results in a similar diagnosis of paranoia: Aha, so you’re afraid somebody might break into your house and rob you? You’re paranoid!

[ASA Vet]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer

My answer when my doctor tried that, was to tell him, "Doc, that is neither your business nor that of the Government. If you speak of it further you're fired."

Always keep the form, destroy it yourself.

[Caipirabob]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!”

I simply never gave it back. Intact.

[ridesthemiles]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!””

Worse:
A good reason NOT to go to the doctor in the first place.

Boy, this crap gets more like Nazi Germany every day.

[CholeraJoe]

I’m a doctor and I have no idea what “government mandated survey” you are talking about. Could you kindly provide a link or please STFU?

[G Larry]

I’m afraid I would have write in my variation of “no”.
But, the meaning would be clear!

[dead]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!”

Then he'll refer your name to his "home invader" brother-in-law.

If they give me a form like that, they simply won't get it back. They can have a big happy "Kiss my ass" if they insist.

[Atlas Sneezed]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!”

---

No, you should answer “YOU’RE FIRED!”

[hophead]

“...always answer, “NO!””

I write on MOST of the lines, “NOYGDB”

[Gorzaloon]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!” .

I had that survey years ago. I answered "Suck", and told my doctor so. He was trying not to be amused.

He was One Of Us.

[MrLee]

“This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!””

What survey is that? I’ve never gotten one.

[Revelation 911]

This is why when your doctor hands you that stupid government mandated survey that asks if you have guns in the house, you always answer, “NO!”

my wife recently had her annual phys - I was with her - when asked, we responded "none of the govts damned business - were here for a checkup not a census" - the Dr. left the box blank