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Girl Scouts Want You To Die
American.com ^ | 2/26/07 | Katherine Mangu-Ward

Posted on 03/04/2007 7:15:02 AM PST by Valin

My local liquor store is selling Girl Scout cookies, and last week I chose Thin Mints over gin, thinking myself quite virtuous. Little did I know… According to MeMe Roth, who is the head (and may be the sole member) of National Action Against Obesity:

Girl Scouts have an economic, medical and moral imperative to dump junk food as their $700 million fundraising source….Girl Scout Cookies are high-calorie, high-sugar, high in saturated fat and nearly devoid of nutrition. Using young girls as a front to push millions of cookies onto an already bloated population further exacerbates an alarming [obesity] crisis, no matter how cute the uniforms are.

Could it be true that little girls are selling sin door-to-door in exchange for merit badges?

This strange little Girl-Scouts-cause-obesity trope has been making the rounds for a while now: The New York Times' Nicholas Kristof penned a column during last year's selling season in which he worried about the growing menace of "little girls intent on clogging your arteries and killing you with their sweetness." At least Kristof maintained a semi-satirical tone. He knew that he was proposing something on the silly side: "Actually, it's a pity that Girl Scout cookies are being sold by cherubs," he wrote. "If the sellers were Iranians with turbans and menacing frowns, then the authorities might be more alert to the dangers."

Even before Kristof, a television ad produced by the pro-business Center for Consumer Freedom put a Girl Scout on the stand to demonstrate the absurdity of obesity-related lawsuits. "You make them taste good on purpose, don't you?" a sinister trial lawyer asks a beribboned, beanie-wearing defendant.

But now Roth has done it for real—and with little discernable humor. "I’ve always cringed at young females identifying themselves with baked goods," she says. "And I’m not convinced more cookies makes the world a better place."

But of course, more cookies do make the world a better place—as anyone who has ever had a crunchy, coconut-y, chocolate-dipped Samoa can attest. People buy Girl Scout cookies because they are good cookies for a good cause. Most people buy (and eat) them in moderation, so a boycott isn't changing health outcomes for the vast majority of cookie customers. And as Roth rightly points out, the Girl Scouts rely on the cookies for $700 million in revenue every year, revenue that they are unlikely to be able to replace with other sources—even in the five-year transition time graciously allotted to them by Roth.

More choices don't make people fat, bad choices make people fat. In the case of Girl Scout cookies, more choices could even make you thinner. The Girl Scouts experiment with new flavors every year, and have removed trans fats from this year's batch. The new flavors tend to be low fat or boast some other health conscious modification. A boycott (girlcott?) against all Girl Scout cookies by the most health-conscious segment of consumers is unlikely to encourage more experimentation.

This isn't Roth's first anti-fat publicity stunt. She also hosts the Wedding Gown Challenge, which encourages women to do annual checks to make sure that they still fit into their wedding gowns: "Most women I know commit fraud on their wedding days—they weigh-in for the walk down the aisle with no expectation of maintaining that weight year after year." (When I visited, Google Ads for eating disorder treatments graced the right column of her main page—but, for the record, she also discourages "extreme" pre-wedding dieting.)

Roth's message of personal responsibility, and her use of a boycott rather than a lawsuit or a legislative ban are to be applauded. But she is still on the wrong track. Scapegoating particular foods or companies (remember the lawsuit blaming McDonalds for obesity?) isn't a sensible approach. There isn't a single man, woman, or child in America who thinks that Thin Mints are slimming, name notwithstanding. Adorable salesgirls in knee socks are not tricking buyers or leading them down the garden path, most people just buy a box or two of nostalgic cookies once a year for kicks. They know what they're getting.

And what could be more American than Girl Scout cookies? The scouts have been selling cookies since 1917. Roth says that they "sell up to 200 million boxes yearly—that's about one box for every overweight American." But one box of cookies a year each, for a total of 1,350 calories, isn't too bad—certainly not enough to add an extra roll to anyone's midsection or roll anyone into an early grave.

Actually, there is one thing that's more American than Thin Mints and Trefoils: apple pie. Grandmothers across the nation, beware. Unless you fit into your wedding dress—MeMe Roth could be coming for your pie pans next.

Katherine Mangu-Ward is associate editor at Reason magazine.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial
KEYWORDS: cookiemadness; fatnazis; foodnazis; girlscoutcookies; girlscouts; memeroth
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To: Diana in Wisconsin
Hey, Mama! How many boxes of "Cold Death" do you & your Troop have left to sell?

My troop sold every one of the 696 boxes of cookies we ordered!!! And there were only 6 girls eligible to sell them. We will now have a nice chunk of change in the Troop account to cover most of the costs of the girl's camping trip in April :)

61 posted on 03/04/2007 10:57:08 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Valin

“Somewhere between the wedding reception and delivery room, many women abandon their brains, body and libido.”

And some people are born with the arrogance gene and should mind their own business!

62 posted on 03/04/2007 10:57:33 AM PST by kcvl
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To: poindexter
but gets just a few cents for every box of cookies they sell

I call foul

they make between 50 cents and a buck per box depending on the type and local council policy.

signed retired GS cookie Dad

63 posted on 03/04/2007 10:58:24 AM PST by nascarnation
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To: Gabz

*APPLAUSE* Glad to hear it. Stick it to 'em!


64 posted on 03/04/2007 10:59:04 AM PST by Diana in Wisconsin (Save The Earth. It's The Only Planet With Chocolate.)
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To: Valin
crunchy, coconut-y, chocolate-dipped Samoan

Couldn't they find any crunchy, coconut-y, chocolate-dipped Americans to sell??

(/thread hijack)

65 posted on 03/04/2007 11:00:56 AM PST by Larry Lucido (Duncan Hunter 2008)
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To: Diana in Wisconsin
ROFLMSS!!!!!!!! This is rich.......

This isn't Roth's first anti-fat publicity stunt. She also hosts the Wedding Gown Challenge, which encourages women to do annual checks to make sure that they still fit into their wedding gowns: "Most women I know commit fraud on their wedding days—they weigh-in for the walk down the aisle with no expectation of maintaining that weight year after year."

I got married for the 1st time in 1984, if I still had that dress it would be too BIG for me!!! (it went to a good cause, I wore it for a Jello-slide to support the Leukemia Society). I remarried in 1997, that dress is still in my closet and I wore it to the 2005 Freeper Innaugural Ball.

This woman is a whacko!!!!!

66 posted on 03/04/2007 11:01:55 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: mtbopfuyn
I hate GS cookies.

I don't like 'em either but coming out of the grocery store, just 30 minutes ago, there were a bunch of pretty little girl scouts.

I go the mints. May never eat 'em.
67 posted on 03/04/2007 11:02:12 AM PST by Beckwith (The dhimmicrats and liberal media have chosen sides and they've sided with the Jihadists.)
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To: Valin
In the case of Girl Scout cookies, more choices could even make you thinner. The Girl Scouts experiment with new flavors every year, and have removed trans fats from this year's batch. The new flavors tend to be low fat or boast some other health conscious modification.

And this year they also introduced a sugar-free cookie.......and they're GOOD!!!!!

68 posted on 03/04/2007 11:04:21 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Tax-chick; Valin
However, it's possible that the owner of the store is a GS parent with a garage full of cookies ...

And you would probably be correct!!! When we still lived in Dover, before our daughter got involved in GS, the local liquor store was exactly where I bought the cookies...the owners had 2 daughters in GS.

69 posted on 03/04/2007 11:06:36 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Gabz

My Wedding Dress ended up on stage. I donated it to my Mom who is the Costume Mistress for our local theater company.

It's been in "Oklahoma!" and "My Fair Lady" (with modifications) so far.

Man, I can't believe what a Conspicuous Consumer I used to be. That dress cost me $300 an HOUR to wear. Yeesh! If only I had invested that money in a solid mutual fund years ago, LOL!


70 posted on 03/04/2007 11:08:41 AM PST by Diana in Wisconsin (Save The Earth. It's The Only Planet With Chocolate.)
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To: alice_in_bubbaland
When I was a Leader the money we received from the sale was welcomed. It allowed the girls to have many fun experiences that they normaly might not have had.

This was my daughter's 2nd year in GS and my first time as "Cookie Mom." Today was the final day of "official" sales for our Council and I just finished the accounting. We have a Brownie Troop, but of the 6 girls eligible to sell, they sold close to 700 boxes, and the money I put into our Troop Account tomorrow is going to make a huge dent in the cost of the camping trip they are looking forward to in April.

I encourage all young girls to give Scouting a try.

I never had the opportunity when I was growing up, I'm glad my daughter does. And I commend you on being a Leader, I couldn't do it, that's why I'm Treasurer and Cookie Mom!!!!

71 posted on 03/04/2007 11:15:11 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Diana in Wisconsin

In your next life, just remember to drag your honey down to the Justice of the Peace and have a civil service in your casual clothes. :-)


72 posted on 03/04/2007 11:16:29 AM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (The Republican primary field SUCKS!!!)
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To: Valin

Maybe when Mememememe was young, she was fat and got tormented by a bunch of Girl Scouts over it.


73 posted on 03/04/2007 11:18:18 AM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (The Republican primary field SUCKS!!!)
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To: nascarnation; poindexter
they make between 50 cents and a buck per box depending on the type and local council policy. signed retired GS cookie

You're correct. My troop made 70 cents per box.

signed, current Cookie Mom, who without the support of Cookie Dad would never have made it through the past 2 months :)

74 posted on 03/04/2007 11:19:23 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Diana in Wisconsin

The girls will find that out Tuesday night.....they don't know it yet, only the Leader and I are aware of that. 58 cases of them.


75 posted on 03/04/2007 11:20:49 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: BenLurkin

I tried the thin mints. They didn't work. They didn't make me thin at all.


76 posted on 03/04/2007 11:21:07 AM PST by keats5 (tolerance of intolerant people is cultural suicide)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

I did that last time around. Best twenty bucks I've ever spent. And it's still stickin'! Twelve years already next month. :)

I was young and stupid and chose "Princess for a Day" last time around, versus "Marriage for a Lifetime." ;)


77 posted on 03/04/2007 11:21:38 AM PST by Diana in Wisconsin (Save The Earth. It's The Only Planet With Chocolate.)
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To: Valin
Girl Scouts Want You To Die

Those Peanut Butter Patties are so good, I'ma die happy.


78 posted on 03/04/2007 11:22:27 AM PST by Xenalyte (Anything is possible when you don't understand how anything happens.)
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To: Diana in Wisconsin

ROFLMSS!!!!!!!! That's FUNNY!

I would have donated it to a local theater guild or something, but no one was doing a production of Gone With the Wind!!!!


79 posted on 03/04/2007 11:24:06 AM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Valin
She also hosts the Wedding Gown Challenge, which encourages women to do annual checks to make sure that they still fit into their wedding gowns: "Most women I know commit fraud on their wedding days—they weigh-in for the walk down the aisle with no expectation of maintaining that weight year after year."

I don't fit into my wedding gown at ALL. I was 185 the day I got married. Yesterday I was 152.
80 posted on 03/04/2007 11:24:43 AM PST by Xenalyte (Anything is possible when you don't understand how anything happens.)
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