Hey, we don't need to be making fun of guys who want to play pink train in the mud tunnel or gals who like for their faces to look like glazed donuts (Krispy Kreme syndrome). Anything between two consenting mammals, I always say...
Wow, those are some pretty disgusting turns of phrasing. You don't happen to write those "Dear Penthouse, I never thought this would happen to me..." letters for a living do you?