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It's official: global warming is guff
Scotland on Sunday ^ | December 10, 2006 | BRIAN BRADY

Posted on 12/10/2006 3:02:02 AM PST by MadIvan

AT LAST, evidence that global warming is a load of hot air. Cow flatulence has attracted the attention of ministers after emerging as an environmental menace to rival factory chimneys, Chelsea tractors and cheap air travel.

Bovine emissions account for around one million tonnes of methane a year in the UK and now the government wants farmers to change what they feed the animals to cut down greenhouse gases.

Scientists have already conducted experiments on different cattle feed to determine which one best cuts down gaseous after-effects, and ministers have not ruled out action to force farmers to change their cows' diet.

Officials have worked out that agriculture contributes 7% of all the UK's greenhouse gas emissions. The sector accounts for 36% of Britain's emissions of methane, and farm animals - chiefly cows - contribute the vast majority of it.

The problem is worse in Scotland, which has a higher concentration of agriculture, meaning farm animals produce 46% of methane emissions.

Methane has been described by the United Nations as 23 times more "warming" than carbon dioxide. A UN report reveals that: "Livestock are one of the most significant contributors to today's most serious environmental problems."

The answer, according to scientists at the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (Defra), is for farmers to alter what they are piling into their cows' front ends.

A Defra spokeswoman said:

"We do encourage farmers to look at this research and consider acting on it. There is no regulation [saying] they will have to change fodder, although that may be something we will have to look into in the future."

Britain's attempts to get to grips with the issue are in line with a growing trend in research into cows' digestive systems around the world. Scientists at the Rowett Research Institute in Aberdeen have recorded impressive reductions by introducing a mixture of organic sugars and a special bacterium into the animals' diet.

Belgian researchers have found that adding fish oil to fodder reduced methane emissions in cattle by up to 80%, while the Australians are even experimenting with a flatulence-reducing vaccine.

And the UK, too, is finally falling into line. In a parliamentary answer politely entitled "Bovine Emissions" last week, farming minister Ian Pearson said "recent research suggests that substantial methane reductions could be achieved by changes to feed regimes".


TOPICS: Front Page News; Government; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: climatechange; cows; globalflatulence; globalwarming; methane
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I wonder how they're going to deal with this one if the diet fails - send a fellow from the Department of Environment strategically inserting a lot of corks?

Regards, Ivan

1 posted on 12/10/2006 3:02:04 AM PST by MadIvan
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To: Mrs Ivan; odds; DCPatriot; Texican; Watery Tart; Deetes; Barset; fanfan; LadyofShalott; Tolik; ...

Ping!


2 posted on 12/10/2006 3:02:59 AM PST by MadIvan (I aim to misbehave.)
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To: MadIvan
That's a lot of cow dung to clean up.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." -Manuel II Paleologus

3 posted on 12/10/2006 3:05:14 AM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives On In My Heart Forever)
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To: MadIvan

I wonder how they're going to deal with this one if the diet fails - send a fellow from the Department of Environment strategically inserting a lot of corks?
Regards, Ivan


What is wrong Ivan, you can't tell that the plan is to turn us all into organic vegatarians? I can see that one coming from miles away.


4 posted on 12/10/2006 3:05:55 AM PST by Chickensoup (If you don't go to the holy war, the holy war will come to you.)
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To: MadIvan

Naw...don't you see it will be a call for vegetarianism, then we won't need to breed and feed cows. It is the demand for beef that caused global warming...


5 posted on 12/10/2006 3:07:39 AM PST by EBH
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To: Chickensoup
I'm a vegetarian for health reasons. I honestly don't think it would be a good idea if everyone became one.

Regards, Ivan

6 posted on 12/10/2006 3:09:50 AM PST by MadIvan (I aim to misbehave.)
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To: MadIvan
There was actually a television program a few years back, "After The Warming" I think it was.

It postulated that the UN would send its armies into the western US and Brazil to stamp out radical beef farmers because bovine flatulence was a lethal threat to mankind.

I got a good laugh out of that one.

Sending the UN Army into the western US.... My God the undertakers would be working three shifts.

L

7 posted on 12/10/2006 3:15:23 AM PST by Lurker (Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.)
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To: MadIvan
Why stop at cows? There are dozens of other feed animals, not to mention thousand upon thousands of wild animals farting all over the world.

Myriad study groups need to be set up - at your expense - to study just hoe elephants are destroying the Earth.

The whole problem stems from a strange perspective that we humans are not even needed or wanted here, but are barely tolerated parasites whose existence must now be controlled in every way or the sky will literally fall in.

Vladimir Lenin would be proud..
8 posted on 12/10/2006 3:23:00 AM PST by bill1952 ("All that we do is done with an eye towards something else.")
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To: bill1952; MadIvan
Why stop at cows? There are dozens of other feed animals, not to mention thousand upon thousands of wild animals farting all over the world.

The problem is primarily caused bu Ruminants (animals with 2 stomachs)

At one time the were more buffalo on the U.S. prairie than there are cattle now. Buffalo are ruminants, too.

The list of Ruminants isn't all that long. Perhaps someone with more knowledge can post a list.

Cats, Dogs, and Horses ARE NOT ruminants. (at least that's what I've been told)

9 posted on 12/10/2006 3:31:07 AM PST by Iowa Granny
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To: MadIvan

Huge bison herds used to roam the plains and the planet seemed to survive in good shape.

The article's title is misleading, IMO.


10 posted on 12/10/2006 3:33:24 AM PST by prairiebreeze (Unapologetically Celebrating the Birth of Christ!!)
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To: prairiebreeze
To be perfectly honest, there's not much we can do about it. Just like "climate change"; there has never been and never will be stability in weather patterns on an ever-changing planet. The weatherman can't predict weather a week from now; it's not bloody likely he's going to be able to figure it out years ahead.

Regards, Ivan

11 posted on 12/10/2006 3:35:29 AM PST by MadIvan (I aim to misbehave.)
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To: prairiebreeze

Huge bison herds used to roam the plains. While farting.

Glad I wasn't there. The campfire scene from "Blazing Saddles" pales in comparison.

Didn't enormous prairie fires occur frequently in those days?


12 posted on 12/10/2006 3:51:45 AM PST by elcid1970
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To: MadIvan

Okay, how about this -- Bean-O for Bessie?

I can see the government funding a marine program to study the impact of whale flatulence on the environment, maybe tasking a few subs to trail and sniff.

Or how about a rig like the tubes in "Matrix", except hooked up so farmers can capture and process the methane, thereby reducing dependence on mid-East oil.

Such a system could provide alternative employment for French vintners, who could apply their distinguished noses to the task of establishing the right mix of, say -- Guernsey and Angus flatulence -- for optimum energy use.

I'm sure the cows would get used to it after a while (the tubes, not the sniffing).


13 posted on 12/10/2006 3:51:55 AM PST by Quiller (When you're fighting to survive, there is no "try" -- there is only do, or do not.)
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To: Iowa Granny
The problem is primarily caused bu Ruminants (animals with 2 stomachs) . . . Cats, Dogs, and Horses ARE NOT ruminants. (at least that's what I've been told)

Maybe not, but what my dog lacks in volume, he sure makes up for in potency!

14 posted on 12/10/2006 3:54:19 AM PST by Quiller (When you're fighting to survive, there is no "try" -- there is only do, or do not.)
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To: Iowa Granny

True, cows and bison are ruminents, but that doesn't mean that other animals don't produce methane when they fart. Humans are included in this. In fact, as far as I know, all animals that fart, which includes all mammals (I think), produce methane when they fart. Meat eaters, plant eaters, and omnivores.


15 posted on 12/10/2006 3:57:39 AM PST by jim35 ("...when the lion and the lamb lie down together, ...we'd better damn sure be the lion")
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To: elcid1970

Bison sitting around a camp fire lighting farts?


16 posted on 12/10/2006 3:57:42 AM PST by JOHANNES801 (I have no tag line, cause I say nasty things.)
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To: MadIvan
My questions to them....

Why single out the bovines? Don't humans contribute to the methane problem?

Coming soon to the legislature near you....today it's trans fat...tomorrow beans and cabbage will be outlawed. ;^)

17 posted on 12/10/2006 4:03:35 AM PST by DCPatriot ("It aint what you don't know that kills you. It's what you know that aint so" Theodore Sturgeon)
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To: MadIvan
Watch out, Ivan.

They're coming for your cabbage. ;^)

18 posted on 12/10/2006 4:05:59 AM PST by DCPatriot ("It aint what you don't know that kills you. It's what you know that aint so" Theodore Sturgeon)
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To: DCPatriot
Coming soon to the legislature near you....today it's trans fat...tomorrow beans and cabbage will be outlawed. ;^)

Naw, congress would never pass legislation against hot, noxious gas. It would be too much like outlawing themselves.

Oh wait -- the ethics regulations and child protection laws they have passed don't seem to slow the congressthings down much, do they?

19 posted on 12/10/2006 4:09:06 AM PST by Quiller (When you're fighting to survive, there is no "try" -- there is only do, or do not.)
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To: MadIvan

WHOA there pardner, SOLAR ENERGY makes green grass, cows eat green grass, we eat cows; thus the environmentalists DREAM : SOLAR ENERGY into FOOD, ie, more methane = global warming = more seawater evaporated = more rain = more green grass = more cows = more FOOD from natural SOLAR ENERGY. WOW, are we onto something here?


20 posted on 12/10/2006 4:13:01 AM PST by timer
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